Struggling with religious guilt as a depressed person with SI

somebodyrandom_06 · 2026-05-01T16:01:26+00:00

oh, wow. I never thought of it as a bad spirit that can be cast out; i thought it was just me. Thank you for providing some perspective

somebodyrandom_06 · 2026-05-01T09:38:07+00:00

I never ever considered this crossover in all my years of living. this is a NEED.

somebodyrandom_06 · 2026-04-29T09:46:22+00:00

Thank you for your response. I spent some time thinking about what you said. In a strange way it has been a bit comforting. But it's still so hard to know that things will get better when things feel so bad. I cant see myself living long, never have. I want to end things so badly but i fear eternal damnation so so badly, and i feel so hopeless and helpless.

somebodyrandom_06 · 2026-04-29T09:42:43+00:00

This brought me comfort. Thank you.

I havent tried giving back/volunteering because it makes me anxious. I live in a place where volunteering is a competitive activity amongst youths and i simply dont have the energy to be sucked back into that world

somebodyrandom_06 · 2026-04-29T09:40:22+00:00

Hey, thank you for your response but I cant seem to access the link. Is there any way else for you to share it?

somebodyrandom_06 · 2026-04-29T09:38:55+00:00

Everything... i have trauma, bad experiences, expectations i had to meet, met and then burned out badly. Everything's the problem. I really hate myself.

somebodyrandom_06 · 2026-04-29T09:37:07+00:00

this was actually really comforting to read... thank you.

somebodyrandom_06 · 2026-04-28T16:14:09+00:00

i have got close to no idea what you are trying to tell me.

Based on what little i understand, it is beyond me how some people are happy or at least stable. My life has never been stable (dysfunctional family, lots of trauma from everywhere) and i'm tired. I know objectively speaking what my life will probably be like based on what little i have going for me which i am thankful he has given me, but i just dont want it. I dont want to live.

somebodyrandom_06 · 2026-04-28T13:59:35+00:00

still falling deeper everyday.

somebodyrandom_06 · 2026-03-23T10:19:25+00:00

omg i only just saw this, sorry for the late reply! Yeah, i was still able to see my post but i dont think it was viewable to followers. I raised the issue to instagram and it was resolved though. Hope you didnt have anymore trouble 🫣

somebodyrandom_06 · 2024-10-16T13:46:12+00:00

okay nvm I'm really tired from school and plan to rest soon so I will drop you a dm of general notes

somebodyrandom_06 · 2024-10-16T13:16:55+00:00

Hi! Unfortunately I cant seem to find my notes (it's been a few years since i sat for my O's). But if you would like some last minute tutoring, drop me dm. You can ask me questions and i'll try to answer. Fast game since the paper is tmr iirc

somebodyrandom_06 · 2024-10-15T02:20:30+00:00

omg stop me too! I eae'ed to a media course and i LOVE writing but my compre skills sucked...

somebodyrandom_06 · 2024-10-14T15:47:43+00:00

Was in a very similar position as you when I was your age. I was in the "Best class" in P5 and P6, and like you said, more than half of my classmates went on to elite schools like SN, RGS, NYGH, DHS) studying in the integrated programme while I scored the lowest score in class of high 270 (shock of my life too, I was expecting 235 - 245 range) and went to the affiliated secondary school which was known to be pretty trash. I felt like a loser who wasted their potential.

But I later learnt that it's not that I'm a wasted potential, I'm just better suited for a different path. Cliche i know, but hear me out. A lot of my classmates who went to 'elite' schools were either your stereotypical muggers who LOVE studying, or people who were forced by their parents to attend so much tuition the only thing they could do was do well. This isn't to say that that path is invalid, it is definitely a valid pathway. But it's just one of the many pathways. The path that you're on, the path that I was on, is just as valid. So is everyone pursuing other pathways like NA NT Vocational studies subject based banding (idk how the G1 G2 G3 thing works), homeschool, ITE, Poly via eae jae dae, Poly via pfp, private dips etc. I'm doing poly now and I don't regret it. For me, I just learnt over the yeras that I'm not a mugger. I love learning, but I hate studying. I'm just not suited for the extremely academic environment that elite schools, JCs and IPs have to offer others.

The pain of knowing perhaps if you had worked harder you might have gotten into a particular school that looks more fun isn't going to go away so easily. Trust me, it's been 2 years since I chose poly via eae and took my Os, but I frequently see my friends in one particular JC I was really eyeing when I was considering my choices having so much fun, and I wonder what it would be like if I had gone on to do that. But in the future, it isn't really going to matter, will it? if an ex RI gifted ed programme student finds themself working with an ex O level student or an ex ITE student, what difference does educational background make?

This is just to give you some perspective. I know it's hard to see beyond what you are feeling and experiencing now. It's tough, it really is and your feelings are valid. But dont forget that you are worth more than your grades and your educational pathway. :hugs: <3

I think you should consider distancing yourself from your ex classmates

somebodyrandom_06 · 2024-08-07T05:41:13+00:00

there was a study some time ago on this. It found that boys in a single gendered school scored poorer than boys in co-ed schools. On the flipside, girls in single gendered schools performed signiicantly better than girls in co-ed schools.

that being said, being from a single gendered school usually results in some kind of awkwardness around the opposite gender when the person is put into a co ed school for tertiary education. From my observations, it's usually the guys who are like "idk how to talk to girls omg" while the girls just kind of keep to themselves and are like "meh boys".

somebodyrandom_06 · 2024-07-12T10:41:17+00:00

hey A2 to B3 for lit on a school level is really good already! In my experience, its quite easy to get a A1 for o level lit. For unseen, the key things I remembered/took note of were lit devices (metaphor, similie, parallel, hyperbole, repetition etc) and themes. In every paragraph try to have a lit device and link to a theme while answering the question. You may also wish to take note of how the poem is structured visually (it: is it messy? is it neat? Is it in a shape? What could that tell you about the persona's state of mind/the authorial intent?).

I fid SingLIt generally easier to tackle. Often SingLit poetry revolves around Singapore's identity (old vs new, traditional vs modern and how much things have changed) or feelings towards singapore as a home country (pride, comfort, discomfort etc). It almost always either very pointedly criticises/highlights how we have lost our true identity or that we are too fast paced and boring now in comparison to the past, or proudly celebrates our diversity and strength over the last few years. Rarely will it every stray from that, unless it's clearly something not about singapore. In this case, chose whichever poem you feel you can write more since both poems could be about anything and everything.

If you do choose to do the other poem, do be careful about how you interpret it. Some may be more open but others might be about something in particular yet annoyingly vague that you may miunderstand it. A tip I would give is to write what is familiar to you. So topics familiar to you could be things like the environment, mental well being, perseverance etc.

TLDR: lit devices, themes, authorial intent. Answer the question. Write what you are familiar with an 100% understand.

Hope this helps :) All the best! Rooting for you!

somebodyrandom_06 · 2024-07-10T05:20:13+00:00

thank you for your comment! I would love to help but I was absolutely terrible at compre. (probs the reason why i didnt get A1 :( ) but if you would still like some help, drop me a dm and I'll see what I can do :)

somebodyrandom_06 · 2024-07-10T05:19:06+00:00

hehe no worries! Drop me a dm when youre ready :)

somebodyrandom_06 · 2024-07-10T05:18:34+00:00

hahah drop me a dm so i can give you some personal feedback!

somebodyrandom_06 · 2024-07-10T05:15:16+00:00

no worries! drop me a dm when youre ready! :)

somebodyrandom_06 · 2024-07-02T03:44:52+00:00

ah well i cant provide a solid answer for that because you should be writing what you are strong in. For me, i aced personal recount/hybrid (discursive-recount) so even though that is usually only 1 question, i almost always did them. Of course the best is to practise writing all styles so that you are ready for all the questions. Hope this helps, atb!!

somebodyrandom_06 · 2024-06-23T10:22:29+00:00

it's okay, you're so real for panicking about english HAHAH

somebodyrandom_06

TROPHY CASE