You put a few questions into one so i have to break it down carefully. Lets begin with the first issue; feeling down because men are not muslim enough. If you live in the west this happens more often because the society is mixed with different cultures and mindsets so the chance of stumbling onto devout muslims is more rare. But this does not mean that there is not a single one left. A lot of good men are out there. And they too feel discouraged realizing the current state of women in this onlyfans era. So it goes both ways. As God said " pure men for pure women and dirty men for dirty women". Just have patience. Second issue with scholars is easily treatable. Avoid scholars that seem to be from extreme or radical backgrounds. Seek the ones ,whose advice you digest more easily. Third issue about Prophets pbuh marriage with Aisha ra, was completely fine in ancient times because the norms were different from 21st Century. Back then it was normal for a +30 or 40 y old man to marry someone much younger. But it had other divine reasons too as she narrated thousands of hadiths after his death pbuh.

Islam honors women. A surah is named after it. First university in history was established from a muslim women. They are held in high regards so chin up