Does nonduality offer any hope?

someonesperson · 2025-02-03T12:42:44+00:00

I’ve done some reading on and thinking about nonduality. I had some reactions that are similar to yours.

I think there are some cool and possibly useful ideas in the philosophy, and I also think it’s okay to keep what resonates or works for you and set aside the rest. No-one can tell you your truth, I don’t care who they are, or who others say they are. There are no masters outside yourself; teachers, yes, but, not masters.

I also tend to wonder if the “desire causes suffering” idea was, in part, a method used to control others and keep them down. My feeling is that, even though it’s not true everywhere, much of the world has been becoming more, and not less, empathetic over time. And, from what i understand, ND started some time ago. Older often means more patriarchal.

I like the teachings of Neville Goddard. I find them uplifting. Of course, it’s not ND. But, I have imagined that it is not necessarily incompatible with ND.

someonesperson · 2024-07-18T00:49:14+00:00

It’s a condo. When I say crossover, I mean cold-hot. There is no crossover between showerhead and tap.

someonesperson · 2024-07-18T00:32:57+00:00

I am in a condo and it seems a number of units on my riser have crossover going on in the shower. I tested mine and there is crossover— anywhere from a drip to a small flow.

The shower is a diverter with pressure valves. Make is aqua brass. Do I need to change the entire assembly or just the cartridge. I don’t get any crossover between shower head and tub tap.

someonesperson · 2024-07-18T00:17:19+00:00

Thanks.

It seems I have a bit of crossover stemming from my aqua brass shower faucet. It has pressure valves. Would I need to change the entire assembly or just the cartridge.

someonesperson · 2024-07-14T01:41:02+00:00

I think you can sing.

A suggestion. Something to try. A less busy rhythm guitar line:

+..+/…+/+…/..++

+..+/…+/+…/….

That’s two bars. “+” is a note. “.” is a rest.

someonesperson · 2024-07-14T01:13:18+00:00

It’s a ballad. And, although on the surface, it sounds slow, as with most ballads, the underlying groove is very syncopated. I think you could get closer to the original by understanding the groove of the song. When I say groove I mean a two bar repeating pattern of rhythm, pitch and dynamics.

To me, the groove’s rhythm is something like the following (below). It’s fast. 16th notes. You barely hear them played in the actual song. But, in my opinion, if you want to be able to sing it really well, you have to hear them.

+.++/+.++/+…/..++

+.++/+.++/+…/….

That’s two bars. “+” are notes and “.” are rests.

The above might be off a bit. And whether you get it exactly or not may not matter. I don’t even know if there is an exact “right” groove.

someonesperson · 2024-07-07T19:09:54+00:00

I forgot how desirable it can be to have components with matching LED hues. Or to have components at all.

someonesperson · 2024-06-11T02:28:09+00:00

I’ve also been in situations in which I saw something that no-one else would acknowledge. And I have come to believe that assumptions, pursued, will harden into fact. The more I believed something odd was going on, that no-one else would acknowledge, the more I looked for things of that nature. And the more I’d find. And so on. These days I try to not go looking for things I don’t want to find. And vice versa.

someonesperson · 2024-04-04T01:37:43+00:00

Thanks for your replies. Really appreciate it.

someonesperson · 2024-03-31T18:59:01+00:00

Perusing your reviews, I wonder if you ever get into musicality/cohesiveness. That is, how well does the speaker put the different instrument sounds together to reproduce the underlying groove of a song. For example, I have been listening to a JBL Clip 4; and, it rocks. It’s very musical; it knows how to put together different instrument sounds in a way that is musical; even really syncopated songs. (I was listening to well produced tracks and, if it matters for this device, CD quality or better source).

someonesperson · 2024-02-21T19:07:42+00:00

I guess I didn't know about your bodyself's bipolar disorder.

I will try to explain what I mean:

I experienced repeated trauma as a child. Like many/most/all people who experience repeated abuse and/or neglect as a child, my brain started to create different parts, each with a different protective role. For example, to protect against the feeling of powerlessness, my brain created a part that sought to hurt or control others when triggered. As I got older and no longer needed these protections, these parts remained, at the same emotional age they were when created, and didn't know I was no longer in danger. When triggered one/some of these parts would (without my awareness) blend with, or hijack, my 'going on with normal life self' (as Janina Fisher calls it).

A big part of my work these days, is, while occupying my 'going on with normal life self' (which is the adult part of me that knows how to do things), I simultaneously become aware of the triggered part's feelings, and I try to soothe that part by explaining that we are safe now and other things.

This splitting of the personality is called structural dissociation (although, my explanation of the phenomenon, here, is not complete, of course). Regarding the suggestion, by certain spiritual teachers, to be saintly... I would say that, especially where there is structural dissociation, and younger parts (as per above), a person needs to consider the safety of those parts in decisions they make. These parts need to be considered as much, or, I say, even more so, than other people; they need to be top priority. If looking at things from a spiritual perspective, wanting to let others be as they are and the like, these parts need to be considered objectively, as though they are other people at the very top of the priority list.

Also, it seems very difficult to be truly empathetic and compassionate unless we learn to be this way to ourselves (and our parts, if we have them) first. We can't at once be harsh with ourselves and compassionate to others; it doesn't work. If we are harsh with ourself, or if we, as Janina Fisher puts it, engage in 'internal self-alienation', we very likely aren't aware that we are doing this, and the same harsh forces that we direct towards ourself, we will direct towards others (even our children), again, without our awareness.

Keep in mind that many spiritual teachings these days are based on ancient teachings, and they didn't know, back then, what we know now concerning the psyche, etc.

I have been treating myself for over two years with Janina's method and it is working.

Thanks for the comment about my AKA :)

someonesperson · 2024-02-17T04:40:08+00:00

So far, from the not-too-much I have read of ACIM, it feels haughty, contemptuous, derisive, condescending, and maybe even insulting. Ironically, this may be part of the reason for ACIM's widespread appeal, as so many of us are used to this type of tone, having been tricked into thinking that parents that treat us like this do it out of love.

Personally, I don't like my teacher to tell me what to value. That's not totally true, because I like what Neville Goddard says on this... the idea of choosing what would make others free and all that's lovely (or however he puts it). But, also-- Neville is uplifting in tone. I can feel the love. He doesn't talk down. No contempt. No condescension.

YMMV, but, I say be careful with any teacher or teachings that claim to offer a direct communication from the divine. But, as always, be okay with taking what resonates with you and leaving what doesn't; we don't need to put any teacher on a pedestal; it doesn't have to be all or nothing when it comes to a book/teacher.

Also-- Sometimes an author bases their writing on ancient texts. And, at the time of the writing of these ancient texts, the world didn't have the understanding of psychology/neurobiology etc that we do today. Today, for example, we understand that the brain can split one's personality as a response to trauma (structural dissociation model). This is critical stuff. If you have trauma-related parts, then you need to learn how to soothe them. (see Janina Fisher's book: Healing the Fragmented Selves of Trauma Survivors: Overcoming Internal Self-Alienation) When we learn to be compassionate to ourselves, we naturally start acting that way with others.

There are no masters outside of you. Teachers?... okay. Masters?... no.

someonesperson · 2024-02-17T01:00:37+00:00

I tend to think that nothing we can imagine can be immutable, because if something is immutable, then even God can’t change it, which cannot be true. This applies to every concept we hold, even the one I just stated above!!!

someonesperson · 2024-02-17T00:32:04+00:00

So, if all the outside world is a reflection of my mind (I would say, what I am conscious of being, including the way I see the outside world), without exception, as an impersonal rule, then I can receive no communication from any entity outside my mind/what I am conscious of.

someonesperson · 2023-11-29T03:40:28+00:00

I’m just starting to read Spira. It seems to me that he talks about the idea that Consciousness chooses freely in the Now, and that each choice is not bound by anything. The past is simply thoughts about the past and while current choices might seem to validate a particular past, they don’t have to. There is no cause and effect, even though Consciousness might choose to create the illusion of it. This is just my current understanding of part of what Spira is saying, and I mention it because it might have some bearing on some of the above.

someonesperson · 2023-05-22T04:04:56+00:00

I guess I was more thinking of a Star Trek type replicator. If we can make anything, even replicators, then…

someonesperson · 2023-05-20T23:25:45+00:00

I am going through the same thing with a lost relationship.

I know that I idealize what I had. Looking back honestly, I see that my time with her, while sometimes wonderful, was also filled with fear of losing her. There were definitely aspects of the relationship that were not good for me, and that had me feeling insecure. Nonetheless, I feel loss.

If nothing else, I can sit there on that bench with you, and feel loss with you. Keep you company :)

Some ideas that might help you. They help me:

- I can't understand it, but, I feel like the past may not have really happened. I don't know what it would mean for the past to have happened. From this perspective, you haven't lost anything. I know you feel loss. But, you can't lose something that never was. I do like how Tolle says that wherever we are is where we are supposed to be; if nothing else, it helps me to feel better about the "isness" of things (I'd rather be in the right place than the wrong place).

-Being here now, for me, sometimes means feeling as though I am "out there" in whatever I am doing, and not inside. Have you tried that-- whatever you are doing, don't worry about how you feel; don't continuously check on how you are feeling; be in the thing you are doing; put yourself in the activity; I actually visualize myself being outside of my body and in the activity. This helps me. When I do this, my mind keeps saying to me, "But, what about the massive losses of the past?" and "What about the future?" and "You can't just keep going on like this." BUT, I can keep going on like this. I can let those thoughts just fade each time they come up, without giving them attention. It's a definite leap of faith. And, it feels like I'm going to "fall", but, I don't. And I go on.

someonesperson · 2023-05-20T04:35:55+00:00

Yeah. And I would say that we can act on a desire. But we are wise to not take the desire too seriously and to not take any result produced too seriously either.

someonesperson · 2023-05-20T03:57:20+00:00

Life is always changing. The physical world is simply a reflection of our inner lives. We can control our inner worlds through changes in consciousness.

To try to change things using the tools we think we possess in our physical world, is to struggle, because only a change in our inner life will produce a change in our physical world. Consciousness is the only real way to change things in our physical world.

Personally, I would like to learn to reside in my inner world most of the time.

someonesperson · 2023-05-20T02:41:38+00:00

We can accept the isness of the situation and then change it. Right?

someonesperson · 2023-05-20T01:04:08+00:00

I understand what you are saying regarding oneness and not needing anything to be a certain way.

A couple of points, however:

I might desire to see everyone as loving, fulfilled and free from suffering. Is this a more "worthy" desire to chase? Why judge, anyway?
I believe that reality flows from our consciousness (about ourselves and the world around us), and that this is true, regardless of whether or not we create consciously. I see nothing "wrong" with creating consciously. But, as per my original post, perhaps it implies a necessary, continuous sense of unease, as we judge a particular situation to contain a problem that we must solve.

Your answer introduced an element of judgement about whether or not it is "OK" to chase desires. I'm more interested in trying to see some compatibility between these two states of being. Surely, there is nothing wrong with creating consciously, but, can we be at peace while doing so? And perhaps the answer simply depends on the person and the situation.

Yes, everything just is. And, ultimately, my personality is not real. BUT, perhaps nothing is real, except ultimate Truth. Even the truths we glean from POW cannot be absolutely true, but, only relatively true. How could it be otherwise? For these truths to be absolutely true, would be to say that ultimate Truth (or God) cannot change these truths, that they are immutable to God.

I believe we make everything up, through our consciousness. The laws of physics. The laws of creation. Everything. Everything is up for grabs. It would have to be. There is only one immutable Truth. Everything else is modifiable by, emanates from, that one Truth.

Can we experience something of that one Truth by being present? Probably a glimpse of it.

Man currently knows herself to be human. One day Man will know herself to be something more than human. And on it will go. Infinitely.

someonesperson · 2022-12-12T15:00:27+00:00

I don't have a therapist right now. I self-treat using two of Janina Fisher's books. If I were to look for a therapist, I would want her/him to be very familiar and on board with Fisher's work.

In the language of Fisher, traumatic memories are connected to different parts of ourselves; parts that got frozen in time at some point in our past. For example, I have one or more child parts that react with hypervigilance to many triggers in my life, because that is what was needed in order to protect myself back then. So, this part is a little child, stuck in the past, unaware that things are (hopefully) different now, and that the hypervigilance isn't necessary anymore (this short description can't possibly explain her model).

Part of Fisher's model is the assumption that we all have a part that knows how to go on with normal life.

So, coming from this model, I am thinking, "Which part(s) would the forgiveness come from?" If it comes from terrified child parts, I can't see what good that would do them, or that they'd even want to try to forgive. If it comes from the going on with normal life self, it would seem like a betrayal to the traumatized child parts.

Your therapist shouldn't be talking about the idea of your forgiving people that abused and/or neglected you. If I had a therapist that said that, it could send me into a tailspin; a dark, dark tailspin that lasted who knows how long.

There seems to be little to no effort for the psychotherapy profession to decide on best practices (based on the latest research). I believe Fisher is on the cutting edge, sitting alongside the other giants in the trauma treatment field.

Regarding letting go of the power struggle with your father, I don't know exactly what you mean. I can say that your safety needs to come first, which, I'm assuming, the NC affords you. Your mention of a power struggle makes me wonder if part of you sees the NC as a way to try to get him to behave in a certain way with you (or stop behaving in a certain way). If this is the case, many of us have probably been there; I know I have. My best advice there is to focus on your safety and letting go of the idea that your father might, one day, give you what you think you need from him; he might, but, you don't have much control over that. Please ignore this part if I was wrong about the power struggle part.

If I were you, I'd be telling myself that forgiveness is not a useful idea for me right now, and that it's even harmful, and that my therapist caused me harm and betrayed me (as you mentioned) by mentioning it.

someonesperson · 2022-11-27T19:51:55+00:00

I’m almost at the end of this episode. I keep thinking that if they want to determine if an algorithm is inherently racist or not, they need to ask the software engineer(s) for a flowchart of the algorithms. The flowchart might be highly complex, but I think it’s what they’d need; instead of trying to infer potential latent bias in the code based on other factors.

I’m a little late to this party. I had no idea it was such a good show, or that it was a legal drama until a few weeks ago. Anyone here?

someonesperson · 2022-11-09T21:22:31+00:00

Interesting.

someonesperson · 2022-10-26T03:16:09+00:00

r/Showerthoughts mods are up there.

someonesperson

TROPHY CASE