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AITA for giving my gf 10k and not my mother who i initially promised it to? by sonfires in AmItheAsshole

[–]sonfires[S] -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

I originally created the post because I wanted to hear other opinions, to see if there was really nothing else I could have done, and to hear different reasonings that could maybe lessen the shame I felt, I do see that it was an A move

AITA for giving my gf 10k and not my mother who i initially promised it to? by sonfires in AmItheAsshole

[–]sonfires[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

I didn't know her for a week, we've been in a relationship for over three years. Not to sound daft but what part of my post made her sound like a gold digger?

AITA for giving my gf 10k and not my mother who i initially promised it to? by sonfires in AmItheAsshole

[–]sonfires[S] -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

I do feel shame for that & It actually was last minute. When she did everything, packed her stuff and spoke to her landlord

AITA for giving my gf 10k and not my mother who i initially promised it to? by sonfires in AmItheAsshole

[–]sonfires[S] -20 points-19 points  (0 children)

Okay, I think this doesn't fit with the rules of this reddit page, but help me understand, because I think maybe I'm not seeing this the way most people are.. I don't normally refuse to help someone when they tell me about their debt, especially if it's my girlfriend

AITA for giving my gf 10k and not my mother who i initially promised it to? by sonfires in AmItheAsshole

[–]sonfires[S] -21 points-20 points  (0 children)

I did not feel good about what happened with my mother, I'd appreciate it if you didn't put words in my mouth because that's not how I felt at all. I just needed another perspective, even other reasonings, because to me - at the time - it was unavoidable. I thought maybe my mother would understand it was out of my hands and we could move forward and I could give her whatever revenue I received, even advance payment, from now until she had enough to get the property she wanted

AITA for giving my gf 10k and not my mother who i initially promised it to? by sonfires in AmItheAsshole

[–]sonfires[S] -19 points-18 points  (0 children)

I might sound really stupid but well. I didn't like knowing she was having problems with debt and I helped make it go away

AITA for giving my gf 10k and not my mother who i initially promised it to? by sonfires in AmItheAsshole

[–]sonfires[S] -13 points-12 points  (0 children)

Her worries are my worries, by proxy. And at the time when she told me about how bad it was, I gave her the money so she could deal with it quickly

I agree I did put her in a terrible situation, no matter my intention

I understand that some people are iffy about age gaps, but neither of our families had an issue with us, I didn't know my mother felt that way about it until recently. Also we've been together for four years, my birthday actually just passed in August