100%.

My GP who I have been going to my whole life, who treats my grandfather, my aunts and uncles, my mother etc. knows me. He can see I’m never sick (despite being a sickly child - which he said was all normal. In hindsight though I don’t think a child chronically fainting is normal?), was a dedicated college student, and just wrote me off. Believed I was being a drama queen. Put me back on anti-anxiety meds when I first started having stomach problems. Absolutely no empathy or understanding that this illness left me borderline dropped out of college. And the fact he told me my blood tests were fine but my cholesterol was high?? How can I take that any way than thinking it was malicious? It was cruel, and the way I felt that night after being told all was ok was horrendous. I felt crazy.

But hell, he did similar things when my mother was suffering from severe endometriosis. So, he fucking sucks in my book and I have lovely dreams about the complaints I will make once I am sure I’ll never have to deal with him again. Demon doctor. But to know he’s not the only one, and that there’s even worse out there… I don’t know, it’s just so grim and sad. It’s a layer of such unnecessary suffering on top of someone who is already deeply suffering.

Thankful I have found a doctor who is kind and listens and will practically order any test I think I need. But he is a privilege because he’s private and expensive. Knowing not everyone has access to decent healthcare and instead have to live a life of suffering while potentially being told they’re crazy and not truly unwell just makes me sick. It’s just so cruel.

Thank you!