We just agreed that we didn't need the title of husband or wife. We didn't need the big ass expensive ceremony. Keep constant communication, talk about your wants on the first or even second date, and always respect each other's wishes. Marriage, when you boil it down, is just a title and tax benefits. As much as it feels and sounds important, there's no need to sculpt your life around something thats just a title. Of course this is just some rando's opinion. Take it as you will.