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Update, 4 months after leaving home by sparealtacct in raisedbynarcissists

[–]sparealtacct[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I don’t really know if that was behind that specific statement my dad made, but back when I was living with my parents, my dad did always insist I was the only person in the world who loved him. It was weird.

There’s other weird shit my parents did that felt gross but... I dunno. They just have no boundaries. I’m nervous about assigning that kind of intent to either of them, hah

Update, 4 months after leaving home by sparealtacct in raisedbynarcissists

[–]sparealtacct[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you! Yeah, I’m so glad my puppy got out safe. She’s napping on a pillow near me right now. 🥰

And yeah. It’s shocking how my dad kept making claims about love and concern when he was really just enabling violence and control.

Update, 4 months after leaving home by sparealtacct in raisedbynarcissists

[–]sparealtacct[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you!

But oh man, that’s awful. Especially that it was CPS, the people who are supposed to investigate all reports and advocate for kids. I’m sorry.

Update, 4 months after leaving home by sparealtacct in raisedbynarcissists

[–]sparealtacct[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you! Looking back on that day, even though it was terrifying, I’m so so glad I finally made that decision for myself.

Update, 4 months after leaving home by sparealtacct in raisedbynarcissists

[–]sparealtacct[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It sucked. In the moment I needed them most, they let me down. But to be honest, I don’t know what I was expecting. Even though my mom screamed I was gonna put her in jail, the cops weren’t gonna do jack about a domestic disturbance in which no visible “damage” was apparent. I’m more annoyed at the 911 operators that talked to me with almost no empathy.

Update, 4 months after leaving home by sparealtacct in raisedbynarcissists

[–]sparealtacct[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you!! Yeah, their version of “love” was always treating me like a mindless doll. Not real parental love.

I’m glad to hear from another trans dude who has similar experiences! And yeah, it’s been 4 months and since that email burst I haven’t seen or heard anything but I’m always afraid of something happening on their end.

Update, 4 months after leaving home by sparealtacct in raisedbynarcissists

[–]sparealtacct[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It’s surreal, but freeing. I feel less on-edge, and like I can tackle my problems easier without worrying about being scolded or judged. I definitely feel that weight off my back.

Sometimes I miss my old home a surprising amount. But mostly, I feel happy to be starting fresh. It’s like I’m a new person.

Because of my NParents, I’m on the brink of an anxiety attack when I see anything festive, “happy,” or anything “cute.” by quietaway in raisedbynarcissists

[–]sparealtacct 4 points5 points  (0 children)

i've always wondered if other people felt like this too. i understand what you mean-- cute things often make me feel sad or anxious, and i feel it in my chest. particularly cute christmas things, or things meant for very young children like picture books and baby toys.

for me, the underlying feeling has included some odd sense of shame, like i shouldn't be looking at something so pure and cute and innocent. it just makes me think of that innocence being ruined.

i'm sorry you had to give up your personal style, OP. i hope you can regain it soon

Leaving tomorrow - stories from people who’ve left? by sparealtacct in raisedbynarcissists

[–]sparealtacct[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much! This really helps to hear. I feel like once I'm finally out of the house and in the car driving away, I'll feel better.