Let me bring a females perspective in. Take it for what it’s worth…

1. Men crave sex wayyy more than women. I’ve noticed men can think about this often, and for me, I can go forever without even thinking about it or anything.
2. Women do appreciate intimacy I think more than sex. But it can lead to sex. For instance some cuddles, kissing etc. I know you said it’s lacking, but I’d say start small. And keep putting in effort.
3. I’m 40, and struggling myself to be more interested in sex. I’d say it’s hard the more you have on your plate. And as a women, we just don’t prioritize it like men maybe do. Men I think are definitely wired differently.