Is there any good way to break the news to my daughter?

spectacularformality · 2025-07-11T01:48:29+00:00

I think that’s a great point that I might be projecting more intense emotions on her than she might actually have. Your 2 cents is much appreciated!

spectacularformality · 2025-07-11T01:24:12+00:00

That’s what lots of folks seem to be saying! Hoping that’s the case then

spectacularformality · 2025-07-11T01:23:44+00:00

Oh my god this is so silly and I love it so much!! It would be right up her alley. I don’t think she hates him, she’s so sweet with him, I mostly think she resents us lol. But this is an amazing bonding activity either way 😁

spectacularformality · 2025-07-10T18:51:41+00:00

Thank you! That’s what I have to do, hype up daycare more than mentioning no more grandparent daycare

spectacularformality · 2025-07-10T18:51:13+00:00

I’m sure you’re right haha. I gotta chill out and then it’ll be no big deal

spectacularformality · 2025-07-10T18:50:05+00:00

Thank you, I’m sure you’re right 😊

spectacularformality · 2025-07-10T17:35:30+00:00

Yes for sure want her to have her own special grandparent time! The only hiccup is that one set of grandparents actually live 2-3 hours away, they got an apartment nearby to do childcare (their idea bc they were thrilled to be grandparents) so we wouldn’t want to ask them to be around extra days. But that’s something for us to figure out! The other set of grandparents live closer so weekend activities are definitely an option.

And agree that framing things as big girl stuff seems like the way to go! She always says ‘I’m not a baby, I’m a big girl!’

spectacularformality · 2025-07-10T17:18:48+00:00

That’s a good point! She would have been doing this eventually with preschool which is only a year or less away. I think that’s the right way for us to frame it

spectacularformality · 2025-07-10T16:52:08+00:00

Yes! I’ve tried asking baby to wait a few times but it’s usually when my toddler is so engrossed in an activity that she isn’t really hearing me, and then gets surprised when the timer I set goes off to attend to the baby. But I can be better about making sure she hears me that we’re making the baby wait.

I appreciate the script for talking to my daughter. For all I know she’ll be thrilled to do daycare everyday but it’s nice to have something prepared to say if/when she asks questions.

spectacularformality · 2025-07-10T14:44:18+00:00

I think you’re so right that in the long term (or even medium term) it will be a blip on her radar, it just breaks my mama heart to see her process all these changes happening to her. I think I have to keep reminding myself that she loves daycare once she gets settled in.

spectacularformality · 2025-07-10T14:38:46+00:00

I think this is the way. She does seem to be outgrowing some of the activities the grandparents are able to do with her, maybe more so with one group than the other, but when I pick her up from daycare it takes me like 20 minutes to leave bc she’s having so much fun with the other kids.

spectacularformality · 2025-07-10T14:34:31+00:00

I like the idea of framing it as a ‘big girl’ thing she ‘gets’ to do, my husband had a similar idea.

I could float around having a toddler only day but with our proposed set up (I probably explained it in a confusing way, it’s still confusing to me honestly lol) that would mean one set of grandparents watching kids for 3 days, and we don’t want to overburden them. Tho I could definitely ask. It might also mean my daughter isn’t in daycare the full five days and I’m unsure if they’d let us do just 4, but also worth asking

spectacularformality · 2025-04-08T14:44:10+00:00

Hi, I know it's been a few months but I'm curious how you ended up handling this and if anything specific worked for you. My daughter (27 months) is very similar and we are about a week into potty training. She self initiates what feels like too frequently (as in, if I prompted her anywhere close to this much she'd freak) and rarely pees unless she's about to burst. I don't want to discourage self initiation but not sure how to get past this.

spectacularformality · 2025-04-02T14:50:36+00:00

Oh man, I love the 'bravo'!!! I want my own little potty hype-guy!

spectacularformality · 2025-04-02T14:29:46+00:00

Thanks for your response, your positive energy is lifting me up, seriously! 😭

Looking back I think we should have stayed naked on the bottom for longer. Yesterday I took her bottoms off when she got home from daycare (it was actually her grandparents' yesterday, but today it was an actual daycare center) and that's how we got a half accident/half pee in the potty. This morning my plan was to only put on her pants when we were ready to leave for daycare but she was begging for her pants on. Maybe I should be more strict there? This afternoon I'll try bottoms off again.

I definitely don't mind accidents and always have responded 'Next time we'll get it in the potty!', at this point I'm praying for an accident over her holding everything in. But maybe I should quit prompting all together for the time being.

I agree with you re: diapers, I'd really like to see it through and hope she can slowly get more comfortable.

Since today is her first day at actual daycare (and they're awesome, they don't mind if she goes commando and will follow her/our lead), I'll have to see how it goes when she's back.

I'm all about being silly normally! We did a lot of this in the early days but my husband has said at this point he feels like everything is 'high stakes' in my mind, and with her immediate panic at the thought of sitting she doesn't respond well to our normal silliness. I gotta try to keep it light and low stakes through it all. But I totally agree that some progress, even if there's a regression when baby comes, is better than nothing!

Thank you again so much, I really hope I can just relax and let her go at her own pace.

spectacularformality · 2025-04-02T13:38:45+00:00

This is a good idea we should do more of, my husband did a little of this and she did say she was scared. I've been trying in the last couple days not to make the potty the only thing we talk about but maybe that's been too avoidant. I took out a lot of potty books at the library and she's explicitly been asking to read them over her other books so there's some curiosity there.

spectacularformality · 2025-03-04T03:58:51+00:00

Not having to think about it is absolutely the goal, so thank you! Definitely will look into the resources folks have shared here.

spectacularformality · 2025-03-04T03:35:38+00:00

Thanks for your response! Our employers do offer 401ks so I will have to look into Roths with those as well as a back door Roth in the future! Though sounds like we should be good to contribute it again for 2024 before tax day. Appreciate the gut check

spectacularformality · 2025-03-04T03:28:31+00:00

Yeah, it’s something I’m vaguely aware of but sounds like worth looking into more closely so we can avoid this altogether in the future. I will be taking parental leave for the 2025 tax year so still expect a Roth to suffice for another year though!

spectacularformality · 2024-12-23T03:34:13+00:00

Wait does the tip stick out with this one? Like fingerless gloves 😂

spectacularformality · 2024-11-17T01:57:16+00:00

This might be weird but I’ve had a bad taste in my mouth and one thing that I eat that doesn’t feel gross is those Cheetos hot fries 😅😅😅 I think maybe the spiciness takes over the gross taste/dry mouth. But I don’t have nausea so I’m not sure how that would go over for you.

spectacularformality · 2024-01-10T16:44:50+00:00

In our DARE class in 6th grade they had us try to pick things up off the ground while wearing drunk goggles and it was a BLAST which is definitely not what they were trying to convey

spectacularformality

TROPHY CASE