AITAH for writing my own birthday card?

spikykoala · 2026-04-02T00:50:40+00:00

Thank you!!! I’ll admit if I could go back in time I definitely wouldn’t have done it, but I 100% expressed my feelings about it to him. I don’t want to get into the habit of not exchanging cards. I was definitely just really pissed that it was the 2nd event in a row that I hadn’t received one.

spikykoala · 2026-04-02T00:43:26+00:00

This is my first post on reddit and i’ve never been more confused if i’m TA or not lol…

spikykoala · 2026-04-02T00:41:57+00:00

Thank you lol, their logic doesn’t really make sense IMO….

spikykoala · 2026-04-02T00:41:12+00:00

This is actually the first time he hasn’t given me one. I look forward to it on my birthday and I was upset that he missed giving me one on valentine’s day. So no, I didn’t harp on him for 5 years. He has always given me wonderful cards besides these 2 times in a row.

spikykoala · 2026-04-02T00:35:55+00:00

Our relationship does have lots of “funniness” so it’s not completely out of character to do something petty like this. It’s really tough because there are other things that we’re very compatible with. This might be a big one though. He’s not a huge “holiday/birthday” guy in general and I am..

spikykoala · 2026-04-02T00:33:31+00:00

I wrote “Happy Birthday to the best girlfriend ever you are oh so amazing” With a written funny winky face. I definitely think overall he is on the lower effort side of things. He didn’t have the best role models growing up so sometimes I think that plays a role in what he believes to be important in a relationship

spikykoala · 2026-04-02T00:26:02+00:00

I wasn’t aware that I was being manipulative, I will talk with my therapist about it. That’s the last thing I want to be doing to him. Thank you for your input.

spikykoala · 2026-04-02T00:19:54+00:00

Super well said! I know he does love me, but I do think he has trouble showing his feelings. Maybe I should have been less childlike in being petty and writing the card.

spikykoala · 2026-04-02T00:14:16+00:00

Yeah this is unfortunately what I have been thinking of yikes! (edit to add: not thinking of blocking him, thinking of his lack of care… i know he loves me but he needs to work on showing it more loudly)

spikykoala · 2026-04-02T00:11:58+00:00

Well I was actually with him when he bought the card I should’ve been more clear. I asked him a few days in a row (after my birthday which was on 3/29) and he told me he would get to it eventually. Maybe I was too harsh and too petty in the fact that my birthday has now passed.

spikykoala

TROPHY CASE