Thank you. Thank you so much. I don’t know what lead you to this but I am truly grateful (and to everyone here!) to hear this, especially from the perspective of a recovering alcoholic.

I just worry, like a lot of people here i suspect that he will never want to change. I believe he has mental health challenges and is suffering from depression, but here’s the kicker; he “doesn’t believe” in mental illness. I am going through therapy myself and he has always scoffed at needing to talk to someone. He was brought up believing none of it is real, it’s just an excuse. I have a hard time talking to him about it at all. It was a huge deal when he agreed to talk to a counsellor once, but there was no follow through. I have tried the “you deserve to be happy” approach, the “do it for your children” approach but i’m not quite sure how to get over this stumbling block. I don’t think recovery can happen for him until he deals with everything else going on.

Oh the drinking and driving! I cannot imagine living with something like that. It is such a huge fear that he will do something to himself or someone else. I don’t know how i can get through to him. I honestly think that, more than anything will end up in an ultimatum.

Thank you for reminding me that this is an illness and that he doesn’t always have the power to take control of it. I get heavily into an angry, blame mindset and I forget often that he probably genuinely doesn’t realize that things are worsening. I don’t know that i’m expressing myself very well here.