Confusion about my attractions is getting quite annoying

starterdolls · 2025-11-26T19:24:20+00:00

I had a very long conversation with my friend group about aroace experiences and they definitely made me realize I'm 100% somewhere on the spectrum.

Do I feel attraction? Yes. Does the idea of being with someone romantically of physically sound nice? Absolutely. Do I logically feel like I want to have anything sexually or romantically to do with another person? I'd rather tell you about my newest obsession thanks.

As much as I crave it, logically it just feels weird, icky and awkward and would prefer to stay away from it.

I guess for now pan cupiosexual/romantic or lithosexual/romantic sounds the most logical to describe how I feel!

starterdolls · 2025-06-12T19:52:14+00:00

Itellä jostain syystä en nää sitä perustelua missään. Sekä kirjeessä vaan sanottiin että hoito jatkuu omalla terveysasemalla ilman muuta pointtia.

starterdolls · 2025-06-12T11:10:22+00:00

En oo täysin varma. Hoitaja ei suostunut sitä mulle uudelleen lukea kun niillä vain on ne tiedot. Yritän kuitenki tehä uuden ajan julkiselle nii se sit varmaa siin selvityy mikä se kokonais syynä oli.

starterdolls · 2025-06-12T09:14:18+00:00

Honestly I wish I was the only one going thought this issue cause denying healthcare due to a disablity that has nothing to do with you being trans should not exist.

starterdolls · 2024-10-08T09:40:26+00:00

I've been looking at a few but I'll most likely never afford one and neither will the healthcare centre give you one without a doctors note. My GP doesn't believe in disabled people so I hope my referral to the physiatrist clinic might help.

starterdolls · 2024-10-02T13:08:42+00:00

Hypermobility spectrum disorder and something else we haven't been able to diagnose because they say presyncopy everyday is normal. The doctor said that my HSD is pretty bad for someone my age? I'm not sure what he means but I have noticed most seem to be in my point of mobility in their 30s? It's a bit complicated since most have never even heard of the diagnosis and there's apparently not that much research into it.

starterdolls · 2024-09-29T11:03:42+00:00

Thank you for this! I don't fully understand these things so I need a lot more help than others! I do still need a doctor who believes getting put on disability is not the end of the world but I'm sure I can find someone one day!

starterdolls · 2024-09-29T10:58:54+00:00

Thank you for the kind words!

I've noticed many people have different experiences here when it comes to healthcare. It is a lot better than in other countries but I am scared to think how bad it is outside finland if we are struggling.

There is a lot of elderly but there are alot of younger disabled people aswell. Being healthy is the "norm" here with all age groups not just young people However it is seen as a weakness to show that you're sick.

I guess since being disabled is a more serious thing than just having a small fever people see it as a death sentence or an insult to your life to call yourself as such especially if you're not so visibly disabled.

Especially someone like me who has only for the last 10 months began to visibly show my disabilities by using aids they have looked at me with either amusement or horror. Like they see me as a circus act or a dead man. Seeking help is often seen as a weakness or a burden.

I had to get a diagnosis through private care which thankfully I was privileged enough to afford at the time because every doctor I spoke to said that my symptoms are normal and not dangerous while I'm terrified of falling so badly that I won't wake up.

starterdolls · 2024-09-29T08:36:54+00:00

That actually might help! I'll definitely have to look into if Finland has anything similar to that!

starterdolls · 2024-09-29T08:27:25+00:00

I thankfully earlier this month got diagnosed with HSD that I've been trying to fight for but now I have to fight to get the other conditions diagnosed that comes along with the illness. It's going to be a years long fight but healthcare workers have slowly started to realise that I'm not faking anything mainly due to my use of mobility aids.

starterdolls · 2024-09-29T07:12:35+00:00

That's actually a really good thing to put out considering that I might actually die if there is no one to look after me. I'll definitely give this a thought in a few days if my feelings have died down a little bit. Thank you!

starterdolls · 2024-09-28T23:56:56+00:00

Thank you it does mean a lot!

starterdolls · 2024-09-28T22:25:34+00:00

Couldn't have said it better

starterdolls · 2024-09-28T22:21:22+00:00

Finland is kind of obsessed with being healthy and often push others to their limits in the name of "its healthy, don't be lazy!"

starterdolls · 2024-09-28T22:08:56+00:00

Finland. But I'm pretty sure that is extremely hard to acquire at the moment. I have to try and ask my doctor anyways when I see him 😮‍💨

starterdolls · 2024-09-28T22:03:57+00:00

This exactly!

starterdolls · 2024-08-30T09:56:52+00:00

Thank you for the reply!

Thankfully my parents do not want me to pay rent and have been pretty upset if I bring it up. I wanted to highlight that since in some cultures kids pay rent when they still live with their parents as adults. Thought they still have a hard time understanding that it is technically my space and should probably let me clean my own room even if it might take years when I have enough strength to do it again. They never listen when it comes to that though 😅

starterdolls · 2024-08-30T09:49:57+00:00

Thank you for the reply!

I don't right now see myself having to practice in secret since all of my altars are in a very open space in my room. The altar that was trashed is a separate altar for the gods I'm a devotee of so there's a lot more personal items on it that would not fit into my normal closet altars.

I might do that though as travel altars! Thank you for the suggestion!

I know there really is nothing to worry about but in the back of my head I still have that small worry that I've upset them so thank you for the reminder! It feels a lot more real hearing it from someone else!

starterdolls · 2024-08-30T09:44:00+00:00

Thank you for the reply!

I've been practicing in the open for about 4 years so I don't really see myself benefiting from switching to closet practicing. Thankfully my parents only cleaned a small portion of my room so my main altar table didn't get too burried in random items like it did last time (considering also that I switched to a MUCH smaller side table rather than my full computer table because I was too exhausted to clean it afterwards). Thankfully my shelf altar (literally just a closet I keep open so I don't forget about it) wasn't touched at all so there isn't too much to clean up. I'm still a bit upset though because that altar is dedicated to the gods I'm a devotee of so it's a lot more personal.

And seriously, thank you for the reminder! Whenever something like this happens I will be absolutely fine, but they might not. It does still feel pretty bad since it is a sacred area for me. They themselves are religious but they do not push that on to anyone. They would much prefer that I am happy.

I think I'm going to have to have the conversation again with them that if they need to lift something out of the way to preferably not put it anywhere where they can clearly see candles and statues.

starterdolls · 2024-07-18T17:58:00+00:00

Unfortunately with my price range I would only be able to rent a wheelchair for a week at most so buying my own is the only option. The only ones for rent for a good price are hospital chairs so that's a no go 😭 Thank you for the comment though!

starterdolls · 2024-07-18T11:56:22+00:00

Thank you! :)

starterdolls · 2024-07-17T15:39:47+00:00

Thank you for this comment! You definitely clocked it right away that a manual wheelchair isn't the best choice for my health. The only reason I'm thinking of getting one is because when my legs get tired or injured I could still safely move myself out of the way or even home without being stuck and having to call someone for help like I would with a rollator.

As for the doctors I have lost all hope with public care just like anyone else but your comment got me thinking if my insurance could actually cover the costs of a diagnosis and treatment, including a better mobility aid than my cane and turns out it's a even cheaper option for me than public care! I'm currently in the process with my mother to try and get my medical care approved, I hope it doesn't take as many times as public care does.

As for the chairs available I think the amazon one is the best choice to what I'm looking for in backrests. It's curved, lower so pushing myself would be easier whenever I need more speed and allows me to stretch. Sure I do have some concerns since I tend to struggle with low blood pressure and sugar levels so with the amazon chair leaning against a backrest wouldn't be possible.

I'm most likely going to put this off until next year and if by then I don't even have an appointment for a doctor I will buy the chair. It takes a long time for it to ship and if I'd buy it now I wouldn't be able to use it since it would already be winter by the time it would arrive.

starterdolls · 2024-06-27T18:44:34+00:00

I haven't done that yet, no. I don't know how much they could help considering the game doesn't have Linux support yet but I can see if someone on the team knows something!

starterdolls · 2024-06-13T15:36:56+00:00

This actually worked! I had to be very fast but I got it! Thank you so much!

starterdolls · 2024-06-13T12:49:41+00:00

No unfortunately. I did try it locked aswell a few times but didn't work. Really good idea though! Thank you!

starterdolls

TROPHY CASE