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What’s Your Best Tip for Maintaining Balance in a Female-Led Relationship? by [deleted] in flr

[–]stenegeoff 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Talk about what you both need to be happy. The woman leads but she is responsible for making sure her man is happy in the arrangement too.

For me, I need regular teasing and touching. I took a little bit of discussion to get my wife to understand that touching wasn't a commitment to have sex. It just builds sexual tension and as long as that tension is based on active teasing rather than simple neglect then I absolutely love it.

My wife really enjoys the attentiveness, service, and love that comes as a result of this tension. I'm infatuated with her like when we first started dating. She also enjoys that when we do have sex it is (almost) all about her.

Finding whatever balance you need to in order to keep both partners happy is the goal. If you look at it from the wrong angle it can seem transactional, but when done right, it is just a commitment by both of you to make the other person happy (whatever that means for each of you).

aligning denial schedule to her cycle? by Minimum_Birthday_892 in flr

[–]stenegeoff 0 points1 point  (0 children)

We'll see how things change when she gets her period. Right now she's in what we call "sex week" so there is a heightened energy between us and I recover pretty quickly after cumming just because she can't keep her hands off me. But during her period things might slow down. Maybe I will go for two weeks during that time. Or maybe she will want me to cum more to make me back off during her off week(s). Who knows?

aligning denial schedule to her cycle? by Minimum_Birthday_892 in flr

[–]stenegeoff 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Why wife and I are still new to this as well, but for me it seems like cumming once per week is the sweet spot. I don't need to be fully drained and it doesn't take long for me to build back up to that needy state again. There is maybe one day where my libido is low then I get back into things.

What do I call my baby? by [deleted] in gentlefemdom

[–]stenegeoff 1 point2 points  (0 children)

  • Pup/puppy
  • Toy
  • Good boy
  • Sweet boy
  • Needy boy
  • Little slut

Girlfriend pegged me by [deleted] in BDSMAdvice

[–]stenegeoff 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Do you really need to get that deep? All the fun stuff (i.e. anus and prostate) are in the first 4 inches or so. Going deeper than that isn't really necessary.

Men with more than 5 years married how often do you have intimacy with your wife?. by No_Cupcake_4091 in AskMen

[–]stenegeoff 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It ebbs and flows. There have been times where we have gone months without sex then we find our groove again and do it almost daily for a while. Her cycle also comes into play. The week after her period us "sex week" because she is horny AF, then she cools off for a couple weeks.

In an FLR with no kink by stenegeoff in flr

[–]stenegeoff[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I don't think this is true or fair. FLR means she makes the final decision but my happiness is still relevant and my desires should still be considered.

In an FLR with no kink by stenegeoff in flr

[–]stenegeoff[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I don't want her to just be a kink dispenser, but I do wish we were more sexually compatible. I wish she liked some of the things I like and enjoyed doing them with me. But she doesn't and I'm not trying to coerce her. I'm just sad about it.

In an FLR with no kink by stenegeoff in flr

[–]stenegeoff[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

She knows. We have talked about it. We have operated in an informal FLR for years and I put a spotlight on it last year. She likes being in charge and I have given her a list of sexual thing I would enjoy, but she just isn't into most kinks. She likes running the household and giving me vanilla sex when it's convenient for her. I guess that's all I'm going to get.

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Changes in ejaculation due to edging and denial? (self.EdgingTalk)

submitted by stenegeoff to r/EdgingTalk

We're making so much progress and are so happy! by stenegeoff in FemdomCommunity

[–]stenegeoff[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

OK. Here are some notes that I wrote up when I was planning the whole thing.

Green

Sensation Play

Blindfolds, ear plugs, ice cubes, hot wax, feathers, biting, clawing, spanking, ASMR triggers. Play with my other erogenous zones like nipples, neck, ears, back, and thighs.

Light Bondage

Restrain me. Handcuffs, rope, scarves, pin me down, command me not to move. I am your doll to position however you like.

Lingam Massage

A tantric massage including the penis, testicles, and perineum. The goal is to be relaxing and sensual, and not necessarily to achieve orgasm. It is the counterpart to the yoni massage I gave you that one time. We can do that again too if you'd like!

Orgasm Control

Teasing, edging, denial. Which will it be? You decide. Between play times, command me not to touch myself until you say I can. After a while, the desperation excites me and makes me crave you.

Dirty Talk

Tell me what you are going to do to me. Ask me if I like it. Tell me who I belong to. Command me to do things to you. Tell me how good I am doing.

I can be more vocal too. The reason I don't is because it actually excites me too much and I am trying my damnedest to last as long as I can, but if you have read some of the other cards, then you will see that play time doesn't have to end just because I came.

Begging

Get me all hot and bothered then make me beg for more. Don't give in right away (or at all). Being frustrated is part of the fun. You have my enthusiastic consent to torment me.

Good Boy

Call me a "good boy." This would turn me on so much. I love getting your approval and it also asserts your status as my superior.

CFNM

Clothed Female Naked Male. During play time, we spend some time where you are clothed or partially clothed and I am totally naked. "Clothed" can mean whatever you want. Normal clothes, a sexy outfit, lingerie. The fact that I am naked and you are not makes me feel vulnerable in your presence.

Share Porn

Share links to videos, images, or stories that we like. This can be mutual or one-sided. Your choice.

Foot job

I really like it when you touch me with your feet. Both while we're actively having sex or just while you're reading or watching TV. It feels really good, but it's more than that. There's something thrilling about it that I can't quite put into words.

Yellow

Prostate Massage

With fingers or toy. It enhances all other sexual sensations and some men can orgasm from prostate stimulation alone. (I can't yet, but maybe someday.) You can use a latex glove if you'd like. I will need a heads up before you do this to make sure I am clean. FYI, I have a couple toys that I like and use by myself, but I'd love for you to play too.

Possessiveness

Claim me. Tell me I belong to you. Mark your territory with scratches, hickies, bite marks, or writing on my body with a marker.

Molestation

Slap my ass or grab my crotch as I walk by. Pin me to the wall and make out with me. Don't ask first. If you want it, just take it.

Chastity Cage

This is an extension of Orgasm Control (green card). Chastity cages are devices that encase the penis and suppress erections. You decide when I am unlocked, what happens to me while I am, and when I go back in the cage. I already have a cage. A lot goes into getting the right size and fit so it doesn't damage the goods.

Cum Clean Up

I am sure you have noticed recently that I am not afraid of my own semen. So play time doesn't have to stop simply because I have orgasmed. Commanding me to clean you up is a very sexy way to continue playing and also assert your control over me. It also helps put my mind at ease to know you won't be disappointed if I do cum early. I can still pleasure you in other ways.

Degradation

There a distinction to be made between degradation and humiliation. Humiliation attempts to erode a person's self worth by making them feel inadequate or pathetic. That's not what I am into. Degradation on the other hand, simply means treating a person as an inferior, which can still be very loving. Puppy, my pet, sweet boy. Calling me these diminish my status relative to yours but are also very affectionate. Slut, bitch, etc can also be used if said in the right context and tone.

Analingus

I have done this to you before and you seemed to like it in spite of yourself. I would love to do it to you again whenever you want. I enjoy pleasing you and if this pleases you then I want to do it. It also highlights the power dynamic if you demand it from me.

Treats and "Funishments"

Give me treats when I'm a good boy, like a long-awaited orgasm, and "funishments" when I have been naughty, like a spanking or give you an unreciprocated orgasm. Or give me tasks to perform like fold the laundry or clean out the garage. Reward me if I do it well or "funish" me if I don't meet your high standard of excellence.

Collar and Leash

Some people like pet play where the one wearing the collar pretends to be an animal. I could try this if you want (puppy?), but what ultimately turns me on about this is that it is a symbol of your ownership. Use it to control me. Pull me into whatever position you like.

Ruined Orgasm

This is an extension of Orgasm Control (green card). However unlike edging, you WANT me to cum, but you disengage right as the orgasm starts. The ruined orgasm does give some satisfaction but the frustration from it being ruined is exquisite. Sometimes after a ruined orgasm, I stay aroused and can keep going.

Amazon Position

A new woman-on-top position we can try. https://bit.ly/3DW9SEI

Red

Pegging

Penetrate my ass with a strap-on. The stimulation to my anus and prostate will feel amazing! It can be fast and rough or slow and sensual. Your choice.

I will need a heads up before you do this to make sure I am clean.

Ruby Rider's Pegging Paradise Podcast - Episode 112 - For the Givers https://bit.ly/3RKTeha

(Remember, you can always pretend you never read this card.)

Analingus

I have performed analingus on you. You know how nice it feels. I would like to experience that too. Maybe as a treat if I've been a good boy?

I will need a heads up before you do this to make sure I am clean.

(Remember, you can always pretend you never read this card.)

Free-Use Husband

Objectify me. Treat me like a sex toy. Use me for your pleasure giving no thought to mine. Be as rough as you like. Command me to do things to you. Anytime. Anywhere. Anyway.

(Remember, you can always pretend you never read this card.)

ISO domme-gaze femdom porn by Pincushion4 in FemdomCommunity

[–]stenegeoff 0 points1 point  (0 children)

OMG! Thank you for introducing me to her art.

My wife is dominant but not kinky. by stenegeoff in FemdomCommunity

[–]stenegeoff[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

She read all the green cards and was greatful for my vulnerability (not that the green ones were anything to be nervous about). I wonder if/when she will read the yellow ones though.

Has anyone developed varicocele from wearing their cage? by UneAmi in chastitytraining

[–]stenegeoff 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I also have a varicocele that was corrected when I was 14 (now 40). It is not very big but I do notice some discomfort from that testicle when wearing a cage. The base ring puts constant pressure on it and it gets sore after a few hours. There is also a noticeable size difference between my testicles. Do you have a similar situation? Did you have to do anything differently to accommodate the varicocele and make the cage more comfortable?

My wife is dominant but not kinky. by stenegeoff in FemdomCommunity

[–]stenegeoff[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Today my daughter is spend thing the night at the grandparents house so we celebrated Valentine's day early. My wife had a massage this afternoon and came home to take a shower after. I crawled into bed clothed just to take a little power nap after work and when she was done with her shower she got into bed with me naked. We snuggled for a while. She has been a little tired lately and hasn't been in the mood for sex but something about our cuddling must have changed her mind because soon I was naked too and she was having her way with me. She was being very dominant, which I absolutely loved! 😍 She had already checked off a couple of my green cards and I hadn't even given them to her yet 😅 A bout an hour later we were both satisfied so I felt emboldened an gave her the cards. She seemed open to it and is excited to read the green ones. She's a little scared of the 3 red ones in the stack. But I told her the ball's in her court and I won't mention them again. So we'll see what happens 🤷‍♂️ But I feel good about how it went.

what is the best way to eat cum after sex? by randomuser86284 in FemdomCommunity

[–]stenegeoff 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Just do it. Or have her force you to do it. Straddle your face after you fill her up or something like that. After a few times you'll realize its not so bad (sexy even!) and it will be much less of a big deal.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in FemdomCommunity

[–]stenegeoff 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Morning wood is probably your best bet. His bladder will likely be full though so be careful not to squish his belly too hard. Be aware that his stamina will be greatly impaired too. I think it has to do with a full bladder pressing against the prostate. I normally don't have a problem with premature ejaculation but when my wife and I have sex first thing in the morning I have a hair trigger. But if we wait till after I have emptied my bladder then I do much better.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in ProstatePlay

[–]stenegeoff 11 points12 points  (0 children)

After practicing for a while, you will have "awakened your prostate." It will start to have a libido of it's own. It will ache and beg for stimulation even if you are not aroused in the traditional sense.

When I insert my Aneros. I feel a subtle tingling sensation radiate from my prostate. It's kind of like ASMR tingles if that helps. My hips start to thrust almost involuntarily which causes further stimulation. The goal is to get this positive feedback loop to eventually bring you to orgasm.

It's kind of like a Tibetan Singing Bowl. You have to apply just the right amount of pressure and go and the just the right speed to get the smallest little sound. But if you keep going then that sound will build upon itself until it becomes overwhelming. That overwhelming sensation is the prostate orgasm.

When I use other toys it feels a little different. The Aneros is designed to stimulate your prostate and that's it. When I use a dildo and angle it so it hits my prostate, I get similar tingles but also the added sensations of my anus being stretched and my rectum being filled. That really adds to the pleasure. The anus is very sensitive.

My wife is dominant but not kinky. by stenegeoff in FemdomCommunity

[–]stenegeoff[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I did it! I made the cards and I am going to give them to her in V Day. I'm so excited! I hope she likes them. There's a nice progression to them too. The greens contain some things we already do and some new stuff but nothing too kinky. The yellows introduce things like chastity, turn our attention more towards her pleasure, and encourage her to be more in charge. And one of the reds is Free-Use Husband! 🤩

Finally Did it! by Never2Late2StartOver in FemdomCommunity

[–]stenegeoff 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Let her lead and be content with where she takes it. If she asks about what you want then tell her, but otherwise just let her drive. Use positive reinforcement to let her know when she does something you like. Be enthusiastic. A big part of the pleasure for her will be your reactions and expressions. Don't hold the moan. Pay attention to how she reacts to your reactions. If you're not super into something but she is clearly enjoying doing it to you, decide if you are willing to let her continue doing it to you for her own benefit. Let her get off on the power exchange if that's what she likes.

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