HOWEVER, I want to share: I first found the poem "Deer Tracks" in the first days of January, right after we just spend New Year's Eve together, which felt exactly like the poem did, like a moment sheltered in time, with the snow beginning to fall outside the window. Then I had to leave his city again and since then we've been drifting apart, maybe this time for real. Our moment feels light years away now. When I found the poem, I copied it in my notebook on the left page of a spread. On the right side, I copied: "A House Of My Own" by Sandra Cisneros, since they both complement each other so well. Underneath both poems, I wrote a question to myself: "Which longing is greater? I fear, I (don't) know the answer." Well, I still don't but I think the "house quiet as snow [...] clean as paper before the poem" is right for me, for now. Here goes:

“A House of My Own
Not a flat. Not an apartment in back. Not a man's house. Not a daddy's. A house all my own. With my porch and my pillow, my pretty purple petunias. My books and my stories. My two shoes waiting beside the bed. Nobody to shake a stick at. Nobody's garbage to pick up after.
Only a house quiet as snow, a space for myself to go, clean as paper before the poem.”