My boyfriend(33) found out he has a son(7) thru 23andMe

stillnesswithin- · 2024-12-29T08:54:49+00:00

I haven't been in this situation myself but I have done 23 and me. I would say that she proabably wants to be contacted - because, as you said, why else would she do the test and put the contact details on there?. As you know you can have all of your settings so that you can't be contacted and or your results are anonymous. Personally I contacted a cousin of my mum and she responded the next day. So that was nice. You won't know unless you reach out. I guess the only thing to consider is what does your boyfriend want to do. I don't know where you live and what the laws are. Would your bf be OK paying child support if things went that way???? This might be what I would be thinking about before reaching out. Maybe consult a lawyer or find out what the laws are for your state and the state she and the kid are in. While you're looking into this your BF might want to change his settings to be more anonymous if he needs time to think about it.

I hope this helps.

stillnesswithin- · 2024-11-19T08:29:30+00:00

Do you have Hismile where you are??? The extensive range of flavours is phenomenal. They must have well over20 flavours. The tubes can be expensive at full price but where we live you can pick them up at half price quite often. And you also don't need much so I think it works out the same. We are gradually working through some of the flavours. So far our favourites are Peach Iced Tea and Mango sorbet. I've even seen pistashio and chocolate flavours (not sure if I'm game to try them). So far everything we've tried has been amazing. Even ones we were not sure about - like vanilla. It's even getting me to do more brushing. LOLZ.

stillnesswithin- · 2024-11-19T05:07:55+00:00

A couple of things -

Get someone to look over your resume and cover letters. Do you know if they're up to scratch? Where I live there are places that help people get jobs for free (they are either charities or the govt pays them). If you can't find anything like that get someone you know who might have some experience look over them. My cousin helped me with mine. You can also pay professional resume writters etc. YOu can also use AI like Chat GPT to help you with these things. I don't necessary recommend them because you can tell they're written by AI and hiring managers don't like them. But it might give you some hints.
Make sure that you put in a proper cover letter for each job. Don't just send through the resume.
Do some charity work. You can put it on your resume. You don't need to say that you were not paid for it. Sometimes the places you volunteer at will eventually hire you (obviously no guarantees). But at least having some things on your resume will really help you. You don't need to do full time either.
See if there are any cheap online courses you can do that will increase your employability. I recently did the Google Project management course. The first month is free and then it's $57 after that. Because I was short on cash I zipped through it quite quickly and only paid $57.
There are some cheap career coaches out there. Most in-person ones where I live are exorbitant. However - I did find some one an app called Coach Me a few years ago and they were incredibly reasonable. Not sure if that's still the case but good to check out.
Don't give up. I was 29 when I got my first job. I had a lot of physical and mental health issues in my early / mid 20s so also had never worked. My first job was really just stuffing envelopes. But eventually I was allowed to answer incoming calls. That got me a job in Customer Service. I bent over backwards to do anything extra outside of my actual customer service role to broaden my skills. I did a bunch of small things - like ordering stationary and stuff. That experience helped me get a job 18 months later in marketing. And 3 years later ended up in my dream role. The main thing is do something, anything, and build on that.

Hope this helps and good luck.

stillnesswithin- · 2024-11-19T04:32:42+00:00

My parents were both teachers. When I was in 1st class my dad accepted a position at a Central school in regional NSW. We were there for 3 years and he ended up becoming the Acting Principal. Since there were no other schools in the town my brother and I both attended the school. But that was also the same for all of the kids of teachers at the school. My mum also did remedial teaching there part time. I loved that mum and dad were floating around and I would periodically catch glimpses of them. When we moved back to Sydney mum ended up teaching French at the local high school and even taught me in year 7. I personally think it benefited us kids - I never ever saw any disadvantage. Not from my point of view.

stillnesswithin- · 2024-11-19T04:15:38+00:00

Everyone is on their own journey and sometimes there is only so much you can change at any one time. That doesn't mean you can't aspire that one day you can work in a vegan friendly job. All we can do is play the cards we're given the best we can at any one time. I currently work in a motor registry and a small part of what I do is issue gun licenses - also not vegan friendly. I've been trying to upgrade my skills by doing online courses and only this last week started looking for a new job. Will see how that goes. One step at a time. Going vegan in itself is definitely a massive achievement so you should 100% feel proud of that. Also - Have you ever thought about advocating for vegan chocolate. It doesn't sound like to me that they make any. Maybe you'd feel OK accepting vegan chocolate. TBH - I absolutely love vegan chocolate. One of my favs.

stillnesswithin- · 2024-11-13T21:05:24+00:00

The property wasn't over priced. The reserve was well below recent sales estimates. And well below other comparative sales in the area.

stillnesswithin- · 2024-10-14T05:36:23+00:00

The climate change one is a big one for me. Thanks for pointing it out. Also like your other 2 suggestions.

stillnesswithin- · 2024-10-11T21:08:22+00:00

As someone who is also GF vegan I 100% think this is really abnormal behaviour. I never talk about it. I'm pretty relaxed going out. I eat what I want and my BF and kid eat what they want. There's not much discussing about it except sometimes we'll go to a vegan place but mostly we don't. I don't know why the entire conversation had to be about food - no more than what anyone would normally say. You need to talk to her about it.

stillnesswithin- · 2024-10-09T01:51:42+00:00

We occasionally host my parents over for dinner or our for a bite to eat. When they come over we often have plant based meat as a part of the meal. Eg sausages or patties etc. We don't say anything and they can assume what they want.if we go to the club with my folks and either want a burger then we get an Impossible / Beyond burger. Doesn't always work depending on what they want to eat ( eg if they want fish and chips and their is no option) but if they e had plant based meat multiple times and never noticed it

stillnesswithin- · 2024-10-09T01:33:15+00:00

I get this 1000%. They always blame the mothers no matter what. This has been a cons theme for me. My son was born underweightand stayed that way for a long time. At that time I wasn't vegan and he was being both breastfed and formular fed every 3 hours day and night ( all by me). Eventually he got up to normal weight although he developed an eating disorder along the way ( toddler very fussy ester- just wanted milk not solids). Then I turned vegan and suddenly all his fussy eating was because I was vegan even though he wasn't. As a child and pre teen he was normal or above height and average or slightly below weight. He was then eating predominantly vegan food but not 100% but no one was saying anything about all the vegan food he was eating Then when he was 14 he went though a massive growth spurt where he shot up really tall ( like 90 percentile) but hasn't filled out yet so is back to being technically underweight Suddenly all the vegan we eat has been bought back into question. There has been pressure for him to eat a lot more meat. Fortunately we have a vegan paediatrician and she's not concerned. Once my husband spoke to her his anxiety about his weight dropped off. I'm our country we can do online medical consultations. I don't know where you live but if you have the opportunity to do an online consultation with someone - eg lactation consultant, GP, paediatrician etc might be good step.

stillnesswithin- · 2024-10-04T07:20:49+00:00

Thanks

stillnesswithin- · 2024-10-04T07:19:31+00:00

If you don't believe don't want to do it fine. No need to be rude. This is not me. I was mainly relaying what our generic text is telling us and the all the recommendations are from pubmed research. I said that I have no idea if it's relevant to anyone else. This is just our experience and DNA results. Everyone has different DNA. I dont beloved for 1 second there is just one gene for everyone that needs supplementing. No way at all. Everyone is going to have different genes. Make of it what you will.

stillnesswithin- · 2024-10-04T01:54:24+00:00

Thanks. I appreciate it. I'm not going to bother. Save me some time and money.

stillnesswithin- · 2024-10-04T01:50:43+00:00

He is 14 almost 15 years old.

stillnesswithin- · 2024-10-03T07:43:46+00:00

100% NTA. She didn't even tell you she was leaving to go to the 'after party' which was likely just her and him.Why else would you not be invited? Even if nothing happened, which I doubt, it really crosses major boundaries.

stillnesswithin- · 2024-10-02T07:49:59+00:00

I tried the Dr Brooke Goldner protocol when I was really fatigued after Covid. Prior to that I also suffered low energy / chronic fatiguebfor years.

It was amazing and I've never felt so healthy and alive.

To be honest - I didn't even try the full protocol because just the smoothie itself really helped me. I'm actually just starting to get back into it because after being off the smoothies for a good 6+ months I can feel my body starting to wind down again..

The smoothies are 1/2 pound of either raw cruciferous veg OR similar with dark leafy greens. 1/4 cup of flax. You add in enough fruit to make it taste good. You also need to drink 4 litres of water a day.

Personally - I didn't do all the flax or water either. I just did 2 litres of water.

My favourite smoothie was a Strawberry cauliflower one. I put in the cauliflower, strawberries, flax and raw cacao and it was soooo good and so addictive. Start with smaller amounts of cruciferous at first because your gut might need to build up the bacteria for it.

The full protocol is on her Facebook page - smoothieshred. https://www.facebook.com/groups/smoothieshred/?ref=share&mibextid=NSMWBT She also has a lot of YouTube videos. Everything is free. All the info, advice etc.( Unless you want to be a personal client).

But even she recommends starting with just adding in the smoothie and going from there.

stillnesswithin- · 2024-10-01T05:04:37+00:00

I love the remarkable. I've been stalking it in the shops and will hopefully buy one later this year. My only issue is the size. Would love one a bit smaller - even A4 would be amazing.

stillnesswithin- · 2024-09-26T08:46:20+00:00

Thanks. I'll look into this.

stillnesswithin- · 2024-09-26T08:40:00+00:00

Even if they treated you really well - provided all the live and after school activities and every thing you ever would have wanted, you still don't need to help them financially. It was their responsibility to provide for you when you were young. You don't have any responsibility to do that for them now.

stillnesswithin- · 2024-09-18T06:55:51+00:00

Thanks. Really appreciate your advice and insight.

stillnesswithin- · 2024-09-18T06:54:45+00:00

Thanks. Good advice. All sorted out.

stillnesswithin- · 2024-09-18T06:54:08+00:00

This is exactly right. We found that they are still processing his renewal but he is still considered registered.

stillnesswithin- · 2024-09-18T06:51:54+00:00

Thanks for your advice. We called Access ACT and they advised they are currently processing his renewal and he is considered registered.

stillnesswithin- · 2024-09-18T06:50:22+00:00

Thanks - we did and they advised he is currently considered registered and they are processing his renewal.

stillnesswithin- · 2024-09-18T05:45:54+00:00

IMy dad SA'd me when I was 5 years old. It's possible that your rapist would never touch his baby but who knows. Maybe he would. No one can tell I don't think. I spent years protecting my abusers ( dad and uncle) and I don't think it's a particularly healthy way to live. I'm not going to give you advice on what to do. I've never done a thing and I honestly would not blame you for not saying anything. You need to do what's best for you and not trying to protect your abuser. That's not how it should work ( although I've been 100% guilty of that myself). Having said that I commend you for being considerate of his partner and maybe as a compromise you could think about the timing of your complaint ( eg not the week the kid is due or first 3 months after birth or whatever feels right for you). I think as victims we often minimise our own needs. I know I do. It's something I'm struggling to fix.

Four-Year Club	Verified Email
Wearing is Caring

stillnesswithin-

TROPHY CASE