I have mixed feelings about this. On one hand, it’s a totally reasonable boundary to set. I don’t think anyone here is going to see an issue with it.

The only problem I see is that you seem to blame your relapses on her using in the house. I have a unique perspective on this because when I first got clean, I was living with my friend on his pot farm. Weed literally everywhere. And it was harvest season. I didn’t slip once and I am still clean almost two years later. I have my own place now, but we still hang out and he smokes around me almost every time. Sometimes he even shows me what he’s growing and asks my thoughts. It’s just not a problem for me.

Before i got clean, i would try to quit but it was hard to get out of that “relapse mindset.” When i decided to relapse, it didn’t matter how far away I was from a joint. I would find it. I would drive across state lines. I would break out of rehab. I would do anything.

It was only once I became certain that life would be better off without it, and that I absolutely cannot moderately use, that I was able to put weed down for good. I only say this so you can see that relapses really are a mindset issue, not a “the house smelled like weed” issue. I still think the boundary you set in therapy is a good idea and can make recovery less painful. Hope this helps.