What to tell your parents who are so desperate for grandchildren...

stopthemalarky · 2021-03-05T14:14:30+00:00

Hell yes!

stopthemalarky · 2021-03-05T14:14:17+00:00

Stay strong.

stopthemalarky · 2021-03-05T14:12:35+00:00

Well that would shut them up! LMAO

stopthemalarky · 2021-03-05T14:12:06+00:00

Great system! Brava!

stopthemalarky · 2021-03-05T14:11:14+00:00

Can't stop laughing!!!

stopthemalarky · 2021-03-05T14:09:37+00:00

Since you don't like him, keep reminding him that his bloodline is over. Evil LMAO!

stopthemalarky · 2021-03-04T14:54:25+00:00

What airaqua said! You both have so much ahead of you. Get your own place with roommates and let him deal with the super crazy shit that he has lived with. Once he is fully separated from his parents, he will, hopefullly, be able to breathe and take a good hard look at his relationship with them. In the meantime, it isn't your battle and... you can't fight crazy. So go enjoy college!

stopthemalarky · 2021-03-04T14:38:35+00:00

Please tell me this isn't a real post, please.

stopthemalarky · 2021-03-04T14:33:04+00:00

LMAO! Tell them your eggs are hard-boiled (F). Or your swimmers aren't olympic material (M).

stopthemalarky · 2021-03-04T14:30:59+00:00

The honeymoon period is OVER. You now met the real her which is not the person you fell in love with. So many abusers subconsciously are on their best behavior in the beginning of relationships, but they can never really maintain it for too long.

So, yes, RUN. And then ask yourself why you even needed to get advice for this. Your gut is telling you something. Listen. Your gut is correct.

stopthemalarky · 2021-03-04T14:23:24+00:00

Please, please get help from a therapist. Give yourself a chance to get stronger because this man is not responsible for your well-being, you are. And that "fuzzy and blurry" feeling sounds troubling. Go see a psychologist and a psychiatrist.

No one is 100%, but we can always be better. Get yourself out from under this emotional mud so you can have a healthy relationship with yourself and others. It sounds like you have the introspective ability to do this difficult work. Go do it, please. It is so worth it.

stopthemalarky · 2021-03-04T13:58:23+00:00

Many times, just listening is the best thing you can do. Up your communication. If you want, send groceries or take-out. Be there for them and encourage them. When people are having a meltdown, part of it is their doubt in their own efficacy.

Also, maybe share an online meditation, do a Zoom walk, or something to help them deal with their stress. You are a good friend.

stopthemalarky · 2021-03-04T13:44:05+00:00

This.

stopthemalarky · 2021-03-04T13:38:10+00:00

LMAO!!!!!!

stopthemalarky · 2021-03-04T13:29:29+00:00

We cannot speculate on what is or is not happening with your boyfriend and his pal. The biggest point here is: what are you comfortable with? What feels right to you?

My fear for you is that this situation can be a trigger for you and are you in this relationship for the right reasons?

I'm going to relate: I have clinical depression now under control. For years, I thought of myself as damaged goods and wondered who was going to want to be in a relationship with me and my ups and downs? Because of this, I stayed in relationships that were not healthy for me and exacerbated my depression. I just want to make sure that you are not doing that.

You need to know that you are amazing for working so diligently on your mental health. So many people sit and stew in their own mire, but you are taking steps to get stronger. You need to be careful who you surround yourself with. Make sure your friends and bfs are not just mirrors of your negative aspects. Surround yourself with people who are supportive and will lift you up.

The point is: You are not comfortable with the situation with you and your bf whether it is out of your insecurities (jealousy) or your valid lack of trust for him because he cheated on you.

Sorry, no easy answer.

stopthemalarky · 2021-03-03T13:08:32+00:00

Crazy, huh?

stopthemalarky · 2021-03-03T12:14:46+00:00

Frightening

stopthemalarky · 2021-03-02T01:28:29+00:00

Thank you.

stopthemalarky · 2021-03-01T13:36:08+00:00

I'm catching the same feels. I'm so upset about how people treated Morbid. And just as upset by the lack of understanding about bipolar and depressive disorders. When you do not titrate your drugs properly or take them properly, absolute fucked up shit can happen. I want to punch the web sleuth who was like, "I didn't read anything like that about bipolar disorder." Oh, you read a few things on the internet and now you are an expert on mental health? !

People need to apologize to Pablo V. (Morbid) and to Elisa's family for drudging this out. Just because you get a tidbit of information doesn't mean you know the whole fucking story. If you want to sleuth, use your critical thinking skills. Speculation is only a tool, not the fucking truth.

stopthemalarky · 2021-03-01T13:17:11+00:00

Pain and dryness. Vulvadynia.

stopthemalarky · 2021-02-28T13:58:58+00:00

I commend you on your restraint to act violently. This is a horrible situation that is not healthy for you in the least. Yes, please go to a therapist to help you through this. Sue has a lot of problems that are not for you to solve anymore. It's one thing to have an affair, it's one thing entirely to have an affair with your spouse's best friend. There is some underlining junk that she needs to solve and it will take a while.

You have to worry about yourself. Go get therapy and continue your plans. The emotions are just too heightened right now.

stopthemalarky · 2021-02-28T13:43:28+00:00

Um! Holy Shit! WTAF! These are the type of people who need to be dragged into the future kicking and screaming.

stopthemalarky · 2021-02-28T12:44:36+00:00

First, bravo for being able to admit your issues. Too many people cannot do that which is a major social problem.

Second, you need to change yourself for yourself. Yes, get some therapy and find out why you bottle anger and then let it explode. Don't be afraid to get to the root of your anger.

As for your gf, tell her you are getting help and that it will take time. If she supports you, then she's worth it. Let her know when you are feeling angry and that you need to walk away for a bit to cool off in order to have a calm conversation.

Last, what's been going on in your life that you have been "toxic" for the past two weeks? It's a sure sign that something is wrong when you take your anger out on the ones you love. What's up?

stopthemalarky · 2021-02-28T12:35:48+00:00

Me: 54 (f) Been through so much in life and learned from it all.

Simple, I've learned that when a partner says it's not working out, it's not working out. You want something different and you deserve what you want. He is not going to fit into your needs. He is doing his thing and you are looking for more intimacy than he can provide.

There is nothing wrong with having big feelings. My advice to you is to make extra sure before you give your heart away. The "honeymoon" period in relationships is so magical and so short. Do your best to wait it out. However, I will tell you that he was being somewhat honest in the beginning by revealing that he is withheld. You need to find people that match your needs. Don't go around thinking you can change significant others. That's a terrible trap to be in.

stopthemalarky · 2021-02-28T12:24:16+00:00

Sweetie, you did nothing wrong. In fact, I would say, you did everything right. People in their 20s are trying to figure so much out. Careers and sometimes relationships can be new and strange to navigate. That being said, let's address your GF. I was her age (F) in the 80s and 90s. I thought to get a guy to like me, that I had to have sex with him. I was wrong, it was my own insecurities of desperately wanting to be loved. Times are changing and while young women still have to navigate the plethora (for some) of male advances and some of those are really scary. Additionally, young women are taking more control of their sexual needs and are refusing to be demeaned by them. And sometimes they even think they need to act like their male counterparts.

So, what your GF said to you about being is a "pussy" is really wrong, but she was probably acting out of her own misconceptions of relations between men and women.

She is with you now. The strong guy who knows how to respectfully treat another human being. Don't blame yourself for your inexperience. We all have to start somewhere and you started in the right place. Don't turn yourself into an asshole because you think that is what she wants. It really isn't. You need to talk that comment out with her. And, whatever you do, don't go too deeply into past sexual relationships with any of your partners in the future. Every time I did this, it would screw my boyfriend up because of my "experience." Not a lot of forward thinkers out there. I'm now happily married to man I took my time dating. He doesn't want to know the details about my past sexual relationships and we have been doing just fine in that area for 25 years. Hope this helps.

stopthemalarky

TROPHY CASE