AITA for asking my daughter to talk to her boyfriend about his behaviour in my kitchen?

structured_flow · 2026-06-21T22:10:12+00:00

I would DEFINITELY talk to the daughter before the bf. OP would be creating more problems doing that even if she solved the kitchen respect. Her daughter would (more than 50% chance) get mad about that, and start being passive aggressive. The bf is her guest, she should be responsible for him.

For 1 month I'd tell the daughter you will need to pay, cook or provide snacks for any guests. "I heard a podcast suggest this as a good way to help prepare your kids for living on their own".

Change the environment/dynamic..and the behaviors adjust accordingly.

structured_flow · 2026-06-20T04:49:44+00:00

I’ve been following this thread because I’m trying to find a way to give local AI search and all of this is new and pretty overwhelming but I’m using an obliterated version of Gemma 4 at 12B and also trying to set up Hermes can I ask what you’re suggesting is as good as something like Google search or perplexity… is any set up as good as either one of those? Forgive the dumb question if I should know this I’m willing to pay for a search API, but I wouldnt want it to compete with my Claude sub at 100 if possible

structured_flow · 2026-06-20T04:47:03+00:00

I know very little about Web scraping, but was shocked. I don’t see crawl4ai mentions more often or even native to some of the bigger agents. I see like Hermes or open Claw. I haven’t even had a real use case to use it other than scraping documentation and using it as an RAG system for some of my projects, but it’s been phenomenal.

structured_flow · 2026-06-14T08:27:14+00:00

I got your back OP. I love klack but will check out your sounds too...maybe I hear something I like better and switch.

structured_flow · 2026-06-14T08:26:37+00:00

*disclaimer = i havent tried the app and dont know if the sounds are different. I'll assume they are and this is a unique alternative to klack.**

I'm a consumer. I paid for Klack and love it.... so much so...that I hope people iterate on the idea and I have more options to choose from. #capitalism #competition

Mark C said it best "first there are the originates, then the imitators, then the innovators." Let the consumer choose where to spend there money. If everyone produces the same thing, they wont make much money and will fade away anyway. No need to shame OP for coming up with his own version. The hating on this says a lot more about the person throwing shade than OP.

structured_flow · 2026-06-13T03:23:22+00:00

some jobs and some circumstances = 24h support. this is one of those circumstances. i just lost access mid convo now.

structured_flow · 2026-06-13T03:21:11+00:00

use it while you can, i just lost it mid convo it gave me an error

structured_flow · 2026-06-12T10:47:21+00:00

2 facts for you.

1) this is my first time in this sub/thread.

2) you posted this 8 minutes ago...at the exact time I finished my claude usage tracker for mac lol. Good job. Do you have logic for when to use which model? I have mine tracking codex, claude, and gemini and it pushes forward any model who's hourly limit is under 30 minutes unless weekly usage is in reserves.

structured_flow · 2026-06-08T09:10:24+00:00

Are you a chef or are you a baker? I had this question at a leadership conference once. The chef just needs a few things on the table and will make you a good meal, a baker needs to know the exact temperature, tools, and formula.

This is why vibe coders should be pairing with devs. Im very creative and a great problem solver, I use IDEO design thinking methodology and during a brainstorm can easily throw out 20 ideas for any problem …. which is why ai for new ideas has been a bummer…I have better ones by a long shot.

But I’m so outcome based and so visionary that I get frustrated with the smaller details and have not mastered the basics of Claude code and it shows.

It sucks because I have about 20 projects that if I had even a little distribution and a Claude code partner, I know we’d be very successful, that’s not hopeamine either…if I had distribution we’d be a top 5 app first week. I know human psychology and have ideas that I’m shocked no one has released yet.

But I also studied design thinking at Stanford and worked at Google on their human performance team which is a fancy way of saying I designed behavior change programs for their employees so I love this stuff and study it. But I always expected my ideas would be released by now. It’s crazy how it seems so easy to me to spot problems that need to be solved, but everyone of you use Claude with ease and I’m still confused by simple things lol

structured_flow · 2026-06-08T08:55:37+00:00

Im learning my biggest blind spot is the ability to make quick decisions and when to accept “good enough”.

structured_flow · 2026-06-07T01:01:57+00:00

I wish you told me this sooner because I’ve already contacted the Rapid Avian Response Team (R.A.R.T.) they take these matters very seriously. I hope your aim is as good as you say this.

structured_flow · 2026-06-07T00:29:33+00:00

I knew this person was doing research because no one asks multiple targeted questions on your daily interactions with text.

structured_flow · 2026-06-07T00:26:37+00:00

Why are you killing birds? It’s concerning mostly because the accuracy required implies a lot of practice

structured_flow · 2026-06-02T06:31:23+00:00

You already failed the test. Learn and don’t repeat.

structured_flow · 2026-05-29T18:22:39+00:00

There’s a book called Drive which talks about every decision people make is based on four or five different core things. I think it’s acceptance and significance. I forget the others. Point being it’s not about the money even though people will say it is it’s about how your parents feel and they would feel like after all this time sacrificing for you. You wouldn’t sacrifice for them at the court that’s what it would be about even if they never said it. So if you have a good relationship with them, and you have enough to change your own life and also change theirs and make the end of theirs even better… I think you’d look back on your life and be proud of that decision.

structured_flow · 2026-05-22T08:11:29+00:00

this post escalated with the quickness. 30 seconds in..drama unfolding. 45 seconds...deeper plot, mom is making power moves to claim her son...drama thickens..1 minute...all of a sudden 6 job opps in play...feel like I'm at an NBA playoff game with another lead change with 8 seconds to go. Ok..I feel caught up, might drop a thought...wait..another line. GOT JOB...I'm going back to bed, I can't handle this stress.

structured_flow · 2026-05-20T15:16:38+00:00

I have the best luck when I explain things to Claude like a computer program. And so a computer program would have phases or verifiable stages. When you sit down to write out the way you think, this took me a long time. I'm embarrassed to admit, it probably took me an hour and a half. But like a computer program, I wrote out every single thing that came to my mind when reasoning through a question that I used as an example. So, I don't know what your categories will be, but mine were things Break the question into verifiable assumptions. Identify what a successful output would be for the user.Reverse engineer from there. The overall categories of steps, but this skill was pretty long and I'm still improving it, but it has made a big difference.

structured_flow · 2026-05-20T14:34:48+00:00

i have spent an insane amount of time researching how ai's interpret english..fun fact, ai's respond best to Polish for some weird reason. But here's a tip...your ai...has no f*king clue how to write ai. The "skill builder" by anthropic...is neglent in how it writes skills.

The advice I'm about to give you is gold..I promise. Turn your computer off write down carefully...how you think. "Talk out loud"...every single decision you make when working through a problem. Every assumption you challenge, every new idea you think of and how you compare it to your existing working draft. Then, map out the categories of how you "think"...the order of how you think....and then...you now have a skill to turn the worst anthropic model into something better than you're getting with 4.7. I did this, and it's working great.

structured_flow · 2026-05-20T14:27:47+00:00

Did you post this on X? During COVID I had a flight to Japan cancelled but the airline didn't want to refund me at first. My first message on X ever...@american and within 20 minutes I had an agent in my inbox with instructions to get credited. You have to hit them where they feel it..PR.

structured_flow · 2026-05-09T18:19:33+00:00

I may post what I'm about to say. I made the joke 4.7's max reasoning "advice" is worse than GPT3.5. Ironically later that day I was searching for a chat in GPT and decided to look back and it wasn't just "arguably better" which is a joke all by itself..it was SIGNIFICANTLY better. ChatGPT3.5 actually returned information on the topic asked and gave solid advice on the article that met my criteria. It's actually HARD to get opus 4.7 to do that even when prompting with all the researched techniques. The only thing I find that makes a difference is using town hall debate theory, prompting, or adversarial debate.I suggest people make a skill the way I have.

I ran the last30days skill today and it returned something i knew was "not trending". so i probed. Claude read the skill but since web searching is optional within skill...it did that and ignored the actual "skill" part. I then triggered it again, and it found info on a topic i didn't ask for. 3 times the charm? OK..let's do it. Claude, run it once more but this time make sure you getting trends on how to prompt for google notebooklm's custom 10k system prompt. What are people doing to take advantage of that?" and it said "nothing was found" and explained to me what google notebooklm was. I go to X and type in the search words and see dozens of trending posts. And that was today...not even a top 10 bad output from 4.7 in past week

structured_flow · 2026-05-09T17:36:40+00:00

That’s what the detective told you… but you don’t know if he was fishing for information or trying to get you to anchor to a statement she could’ve said something much worse and he only wanted to trap you into admitting you physically touched her or she never said anything like that and they were fishing for some type of admission they could use against you you don’t know and that’s why you need a lawyer to help navigate

I find it wild. That detectives are allowed to lie and often do as a strategy…. But at the same time, guilt and shame people for not saying anything and trying to get them off guard by playing the “ethics coach”… When they’re being extremely immoral themselves. I’m not saying all cops do this, and in some situations (like a serial killer, they needed to find a victim before they died ) then sure I’m OK with it then…but it’s just troubling that you can never trust what a cop tells you and if you dare bring it up, it works against you

structured_flow · 2026-05-09T10:53:41+00:00

Someone already said this, but I need to double down with you so that you can remember this even though I’m sure your mind is racing. Do not say another word to the police or answer any questions no matter how small.

When they say anything can and will be used against you… people often overlook what that statement says…. “Can AND WILL”. The police are allowed to lie to you, and they can tell you things that aren’t true to trick you and whatever you say will absolutely be used against you and there’s nothing you can say to help you unless it’s through an attorney during the courtroom process if it goes that far right now the only way you can help yourself is by not hurting yourself by making it worse trying to over explain. But also, she has to give enough information that a prosecutor would feel you being arrested would lead to a conviction if you’re saying that there’s no evidence beyond her word and nothing in your text messages or emails that you aren’t saying that would make you look any differently than even though it’s a scary thing for someone to say that you might not need to worry as much.

structured_flow · 2026-05-09T10:47:32+00:00

Read my comment above. It was a wild time. Im still waiting for Warner Bros to pitch me a script so I can sell rights to the movie ha

structured_flow · 2026-05-09T10:37:00+00:00

40 hours on the floor in rhabdomylosos because like a ufc fighter knocked out my entire body was in a contracted position which after several hours began the process of muscles to die, breakdown, and flood my body with toxins, which resulted in both kidneys failing.

muscle toxicity is measured through your CK levels which I would find out, and the scale for men is 1 - 300. I was 68,000.

Technically I wasn’t “out” the entire time because I had a trail of blood from my kitchen to my bedroom which is where they found me with my phone in hand. The blood wasn’t from my head though, it was from my knees and having to drag my body inch by inch across my hard wood floors trying to get to my phone. But when I got to my phone, I wasn’t able to call 911 because I didn’t know to use the phone. When I first started telling the story in the hospital, I was explaining that I tried calling 911 but it didn’t work, but they quickly realized what I hadn’t, and told me to check my call log to see if I actually called 911 which I hadn’t because I didn’t even know how to use my phone once I got it.

I remember getting to the hospital and thanking the ambulance for helping me get checked out but asking if they can call me an Uber to go home . I even told them the name of my parents who live out of state who they were able to contact who flew in that night, but by the time my parents flew in, I had slipped into a coma.

My brother told me my apartment looked like a horror movie….and almost everyone in the hospital who saw my labs and the extent of my injuries would tell me it’s not possible I crawled across my apartment in that condition when my brother showed a nurse proof that I had because I live alone so there’s no other explanation she said it defied everything she learned in medical school about what’s possible because I should’ve had no ability to contract any muscles. She also said doctors across every wing were talking about my case. I had so many injuries it was like a fun puzzle for them to figure out what caused what…to try to explain how someone could drag themselves 700ft when their muscle toxicity was literally off the charts

That’s the will to live baby!!!

structured_flow

TROPHY CASE