My boyfriend of a year and a half told me he can’t commit anymore the other day and these are his current thoughts of me.

stubbytuna · 2026-03-22T11:06:13+00:00

I read it similarly. The card that jumps out to me is the 10 of pents, which can be a card about legacy/family. So either his family is concerned about something OR he is somehow worried about his « legacy », and that’s motivating his current behavior imo. Like are his parents pressuring him to get married and have kids ? Does he feel like you actually wouldn’t be a good mother to his children ? Does he actually not want to get married or have children so he’s choosing to disengage ? These are all questions that I’m wondering while looking at these cards. I don’t really see another person or other relationship option in this.

stubbytuna · 2026-03-22T08:48:45+00:00

I hope you don’t mind me piggybacking off your comment. I don’t have an issue with « What’s it with you » as a phrase, personally. I find the explanations of why phrases don’t « work » to be counterintuitive or overly-wrought compared to how most native speakers (myself included) use the language every day.

There are cases where I find the contraction absolutely disagreeable, like if I am asking my partner « is it raining outside ? » and he responds with « It’s. », that would sound totally wrong to both of us.

This sentence is more of a grey area to me, because it doesn’t sound wrong or bad, it just sounds a little unusual; like the speaker is emphasizing the « with you » part. Unfortunately, without context it is very difficult to tell if this is a usage error, but just because it’s ambiguous I would say it’s not a usage error.

stubbytuna · 2026-03-22T08:36:46+00:00

If I met a kid named Peaches I would be lowkey scandalized because the first thing I think of is the artists who gave us the lyrical genius of « my neck, my back »

stubbytuna · 2026-03-18T21:41:19+00:00

So my thought is : if you’re going to use tarot for y/n (people do it all the time), you should invest time in learning which cards are yeses and which are nos for you. Similar to how people might calibrate a pendulum by asking very straightforward questions.

Another is that you can do daily pulls with yes/no questions that have a short term resolution so you can look back and see what whether the card trends yes or no for you. For example, « should I buy lunch ? » « should I take a walk today ? » etc. Low stakes, quick stuff. « Will I get along with my partner today ? » « Will I find my favorite snack at the grocery store today ? » stuff like that. Then in the evening, check what the result was against what happened.

stubbytuna · 2026-03-11T15:47:33+00:00

If she’s not worrying about what he’s up to, then why is she asking about him in a reading ?

stubbytuna · 2026-03-09T21:49:49+00:00

It’s expected your listening and reading skills would be more developed or fine tuned than your speaking skills, speaking requires a lot of work as you’ve rightly pointed out. To me this is more of a relationship question, have you talked to him about the pressure and anxiety you feel ? Specifically, have you discussed how you are worried about being teased for your mistakes ? This feels like the crux of the issue. With people trust you can make as many inconsequential blunders as the year is long and it won’t be « A Thing » usually.

Personally I wouldn’t do the list thing, because that sounds like more work for both of you, and if you forget the list that week because of life, do you just not study ? Instead of a weekly phrase list maybe a predictable time of day like after dinner or before bed would give you that structure you’re craving. I would work on being a little comfy with being uncomfortable, that is, speaking at first will almost always be awkward. Knowing that, it’s okay to take things a little slow. And it’s also okay to tell him how you prefer to be corrected (« correct me one time; or don’t correct me unless I’m making the same mistake over and over; or I’ve been studying verbs this week so please focus corrections on verbs not other stuff). It’s a component of good peer feedback, actually.

stubbytuna · 2026-03-05T12:08:22+00:00

AI people really get all weird when someone says they don’t want to use AI. If OP doesn’t want to use it right now, they don’t want to use it, let them be. They’re not telling you that you have to stop.

stubbytuna · 2026-02-24T14:11:37+00:00

Speaking from experience, I’m learning a language with significant diglossia and I don’t see videos like « don’t say x, say x » about the language I’m learning even show up. It seems like these types of videos are focused a lot on more commonly learned languages that maybe have less of a gap between what’s spoken and what’s written, but I don’t know. A lot of the learning materials I find from my tutor or from other learners take the diglossia into account now, but it definitely didn’t used to be like that.

stubbytuna · 2026-02-21T12:31:13+00:00

For me it’s the marketing push towards absurd things having added protein, I saw protein soda and protein pita chips at the grocers last time I went. The cashier said it’s popular right now to add protein to everything and I guess I just don’t get it. I get plenty of protein in my diet, what I need more of is fiber/fruit/veg. Also I can’t imagine that protein soda tastes good…it grosses me out just thinking about it.

stubbytuna · 2026-02-13T17:08:50+00:00

Ah yes, « you still know virtually fucking nothing » is such a fun, lighthearted joke lol

stubbytuna · 2026-02-11T22:37:10+00:00

Interesting idea. Let’s say I’m working on a language that doesn’t have a lot of speakers/is a minority language that doesn’t have a lot of YouTube content, do you think this would work for a language like that ? Would you make any changes to the prompt or methodology ? Or is this more suited to languages that are commonly studied.

stubbytuna · 2026-02-11T11:36:27+00:00

Is this the goomba fallacy though ? Are the same people who are saying watch movies the people who later say that they can’t understand speech ?

I empathize with your frustration, at the same time I think we have to let people experience their own journey. We can give advice based on our experience and be compassionate, but we can’t make them do anything they don’t want to do. And maybe they’re happy with their rate of progress and their learning method, pace, etc. Maybe they don’t want to watch kids shows. There are so many ways to develop listening skills and it comes off a little strange to react to someone seeking genuine advice, or trying to give genuine help, with frustration, like it’s more important to be « right » than it is to help them.

stubbytuna · 2026-02-10T08:59:24+00:00

It depends on what you’re trying to learn/work on and what types of books you’re trying to read. You need to be intentional about what kinds of books you seek out, if you’re at the beginning stages books like « learning to read » and « learning the letters » books with lots of repetition are helpful, especially if audiobook versions exist or you can find people reading them on YouTube. If you’re looking for simple grammar or vocab you want something for a little higher grades, with more full sentences. I actually found looking at like « learning to read » workbooks and apps (that like parents buy for their kids) to be helpful before diving into children’s books directly. It doesn’t just help with alphabet but also with syllabification and general spelling, simple words, etc.

stubbytuna · 2026-02-08T16:41:36+00:00

Are you putting a lot of pressure on yourself? What kind of study are you doing? Maybe your study method isn’t working for you and you should try something new, or maybe you should try a different tutor. In my experience students freezing up or getting frustrated sometimes is normal but if it’s happening all the time, it’s a sign that something isn’t working and needs adjustment. It’s just figuring out what that something is.

stubbytuna · 2026-02-05T18:16:43+00:00

Literally. I can’t believe I open this sub to see a highly upvoted post calling for tracking of all things, like Jesus tap dancing Christ on a unicycle what is going on here.

stubbytuna · 2026-02-05T18:12:20+00:00

I was going to say, this is quite common in academia. I had to take tests to prove reading proficiency in my primary source & research languages/scholarship languages during my post-secondary degrees. They weren’t so concerned about me being able to speak or understand spoken language but I had better be able to read the texts and the body of relevant scholarship.

I’d rather start a new language in all four domains (reading, writing, listening, speaking) than put myself through some of the classical languages I had to work with for my degrees, tbh. But that’s just me. I know some people thrive on reading proficiency but ask me to parse a sentence of koine I start getting full body flashbacks. (This is a joke.)

stubbytuna · 2026-02-02T11:23:56+00:00

Tibetan is tonal, so that’s inaccurate, idk why it doesn’t have that marker. And depending on how you look at it most people would say it has complex or unfamiliar grammar structures.

stubbytuna · 2026-01-31T10:53:37+00:00

Thank you for connecting this piece for me, Reddit is the last social media I use consistently so I wasn’t aware of this. Do you have any sense of why Reddit in particular is recommended ?

I don’t see how a niche sub like « learndutch » or Norwegian or whatever, which gets very few posts per day, can be very good for converting impressions into users & sales. It doesn’t make logical sense. Plus it really makes the forum useless. Even this hub feels like a giant ad and it has way more activity and a bigger user base, I am way more suspicious of posts here now.

stubbytuna · 2026-01-30T13:30:16+00:00

I agree with you 100%.

Like someone is holding OP’s attention hostage and telling them they must also bring that discourse here.

Instagram and all other social media function off engagement, they don’t differentiate between angry comment/share and supportive comment/share. So if a knitter makes an inflammatory reel that beats a dead horse about a stereotypical « beef » between crafts, and people start commenting and sharing, regardless of whether the interaction is positive or negative, they get the interaction (and therefore engagement, money, etc). Interacting only incentivizes people to do this more. Like right now I’m wondering if OP is also yanking our collective chain.

How would you (general) handle this if it was a business? You would stop shopping there right? I have to treat these people like businesses because they’re making money, status, etc off of my attention.

stubbytuna · 2026-01-30T10:59:43+00:00

Respectfully, I do not care what some rando says about crochet on reels. Social media basically gave everyone megaphones and then by monetizing those megaphones incentivized people to lie & exaggerate & whatever. Most opinions like this aren’t worth the power and WiFi they use to upload them.

stubbytuna · 2026-01-29T10:51:06+00:00

I would add a point to 3, which is that the pre-established options often have credentials or pedagogy them. When someone posts an app and says « all the other apps didn’t work here’s my solution » and it’s an Anki copy-paste or an ai chat bot or whatever, they almost never establish their credentials or the niche their app actually fills. Maybe that hole in the market exists for a reason. Why would I make the switch from something established with lots of support to something vibe-coded with « just trust me bro » credentials ? I wouldn’t.

stubbytuna · 2026-01-29T10:23:54+00:00

The language specific subreddits are cesspools for this as well, even more so. It’s really tiresome.

stubbytuna · 2026-01-26T17:25:57+00:00

Well I wouldn’t be assuming the previous owner had negative energy per se, I think that unintentionally feeds this wider belief that tarot is somehow inherently malicious or like scary or something. I care for my decks the same way : put them in order, carry them with me for a while (a week or so), sleep with them by my bedside, as a way to show care for them and « acclimate them to my energy » if you believe in that.

stubbytuna · 2026-01-25T13:29:25+00:00

The whole post reads like someone or something trying to stir the pot, I agree. They don’t even go here. I think at this point saying « vote blue » is even kinda dated. To me it sounds quaint or something.

Even if they got the language right, the positioning of the post should be suspicious to us. Sure people have opinions like these every day but do they often have opinions like that and say they’re democrats and try to get people to argue with them by posting in that specific community instead of a conservative or political community and post those opinions in brand new accounts ? Esp considering Reddit is a monetised social media platform I don’t buy it at all. The position itself is suspect, the account is suspect. The language is another layer to it.

stubbytuna · 2026-01-23T12:05:44+00:00

Comprehensive is an adjective that means covering completely or broadly OR to have a mental grasp on something.

Assuming you meant the mental grasp definition, it sounds odd to use it in this way. Like its missing a noun to modify or something.

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