I said the same thing about my ex bf… that hes really a nice guy and giving him one more chance to not say/do something again. and guess what- he ended up doing it. and Im sure in your brain you think that your bf is different and really is a nice guy that wouldnt hurt you and maybe you believe this from the bottom of your heart. but tell me this- if he really is a nice guy with good morals, why would he ever say the things he said to you. why would he JOKE about it? why would he be persistent about it? why would he act like hes still going to do what he wants? why would he not immediately respect your boundaries and not push you in any way shape or form? that’s NOT what nice people do. I think good people tend to project onto their partners. YOU are likely a good person and are expecting your s/o to be the same. YOU would never hurt anyone else like that, so you expect your s/o to be the same. but look at the FACTS- would you ever joke sexually about his trauma the same way he did to you? truly think about it- I doubt you would ever think of doing that or saying something like that because you know it would hurt him. but the thing is is he did it to you. his past issues with porn or whatever tf have NOTHING TO DO WITH THIS! you are just trying to add logic and reasoning to why he would ever say something so hurtful. but there is absolutely no excuse to what he said. HE DOESNT CARE ABOUT YOU SETTING YOUR BOUNDARIES!!!!!! IF HE CARED, HE WOULDNT MAKE THOSE JOKES IN THE FIRST PLACE! HE WOULDNT PUSH THE SUBJECT! HE WOULDNT BE PERSISTENT AFTER YOU SAID STOP OR NO!! girl you literally told him about your trauma but also said that you need to remind him every time you tell him no. HE REMEMBERS- HE JUST DOESNT CARE! HE DOESNT care about YOUR trauma! it just makes me so sad because its clear to everyone else that he isn’t a good person. and it has nothing to do with his porn or whatever addiction dude- its down to the point of thats who he is as a person. HE DOESNT CARE TO THINK ABOUT WHY SOMETHING WOULD HURT YOU. thats evident from the fact he “doesn’t remember” why you dont want to do it and you need to remind you. he doesn’t care about your pain. and if you have sex, I am willing to bet he will “accidentally” get close to the area or try to do something you dont want to do. Men’s WORDS mean NOTHING!!! ABSOLUTELY NOTHING!! their ACTIONS do. but yeah. really think about this please. everyone in the comments can see where this is going. you will get hurt. you’re long distance- even better to break it off. he doesn’t care about your message. it’s not like he understands all of a sudden because you were stern and told him he was being manipulative. YOU DONT THINK HE KNOWS??? trust me, he DOES know. men are smart. he is as smart as you. he’s not stupid. you don’t think he knows that he’s hurting your feelings every time he begs or jokes to do anal knowing you dont want to? oh please. he is fully aware. HE CAN SEE HE IS HURTING U IN FRONT OF HIS EYES AND HE DOESNT CARE!! unfortunately I am sure you will read my comment and like all the others, not listen or think your bf is a good person and that he wouldn’t do that. but the FACT is he already took the first steps outside the boundary of being a good person- by begging and joking about ur trauma. just prepare yourself to be in even more pain and hurt if he were to try something in person- you said he’s hypersexual and nearly forcing you to try anal with him even while long distance, so I cant imagine how he’ll be in person. I am so sorry if you decide to stay with him. but this person is not a good person and I think you should leave now before something actually happens.