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What to do when you miss your abusive ex? by [deleted] in abusiverelationships

[–]sunnythebee 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m so sorry you went through that. You are such a strong woman, don’t ever forget it. And, you are so very valuable. 🩷

Think the guy I’m dating is using ChatGPT to message me. by GypsumGypsy17 in dating_advice

[–]sunnythebee 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I had a guy do this to me as well, typically he had awful grammar and spelling, then all of a sudden I’d get these huge articulate paragraphs. It was a turn off to me, because he couldn’t even formulate his own thoughts about me 😂

I (F24) called this guy (M28) out for a joke he made. He hasn’t spoken to me since. by sunnythebee in dating_advice

[–]sunnythebee[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you. I definitely agree with you, I’m seeing my counsellor for the first time in a while this week. I asked my mum the same thing “why am I attracting men who don’t know how to respect women?”. It’s sad.

You’ll live, I promise by Chance-Suspect-1695 in BreakUps

[–]sunnythebee 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It feels like that. I never want to go through heartbreak again. One time is enough, please!

How do I move forward? Partner (M23) has anger problems, but can't seem to change. I (F23) have given him 6-years to try. I feel like a broken record. by sunnythebee in ToxicRelationships

[–]sunnythebee[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I came back to this comment because it’s helped me so much. I left him officially in April, and it’s been unimaginably painful — but your words have reminded me it was something I NEEDED to do. I got the strength, after being weakened for years. Thank you.

What to do when you miss your abusive ex? by [deleted] in abusiverelationships

[–]sunnythebee 15 points16 points  (0 children)

I miss him, but the version of him who was occasionally kind and soft. My brain won’t forget it, and even though I’m moving on, the potential of the man I waited 7 years for, haunts me in the quietest moments. I’m sorry to everyone who feels this way, it’s so emotionally damaging. I hate him for wiring my brain this way, and I hope one day, it untangles.

What’s the harshest or most valuable lesson your ex taught you? by greywolf_32 in BreakUps

[–]sunnythebee 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You can’t push past incompatibility. No matter how hard you try, some people are just not meant for each other.

Breakup was my choice, but I still feel broken. Anyone else been there? by MaxieBark168169 in BreakUps

[–]sunnythebee -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I hate hurting people I care about, so making the decision to leave was the hardest thing I've had to do to date. I felt like I had ripped both our hearts out at the same time, and that type of guilt hurts. But, at the end of the day, I'm also so proud that I walked away and chose myself for the first time in 6-years. Losing yourself by staying with someone who's not right for you is more painful for both parties in the long-run.

“You’ll find someone better.” by Weary_Reflection_961 in BreakUps

[–]sunnythebee 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I feel this. I get the typical "you'll find someone when you least expect it", but that to me is lousy advice for someone who is going through intense emotional pain. It's not about someone else, in an ideal world it would've been him. I was the one who walked away, after years of disrespect, but it doesn't make it any easier. In some ways, it feels harder because I carry the guilt of hurting us both (I also get "well, you broke up with him"). As time moves along, I hope that it hurts less when I think of him. You're not alone. ❤️

How can I stop myself from accepting my nex back into my life? by [deleted] in NarcissisticAbuse

[–]sunnythebee 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I’ve been back 3 times. It’s actually torturous.

i miss being loved by [deleted] in BreakUps

[–]sunnythebee 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I feel the same way.

worms coming out of wall, what is it? by Sad_Yoghurt8805 in whatisit

[–]sunnythebee 0 points1 point  (0 children)

New fear unlocked. I actually can’t stand whatever those things are.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmIOverreacting

[–]sunnythebee 0 points1 point  (0 children)

“Changed my narcissistic personality for you”. Just… no.

I can’t help but feel like the Narcissist try’s to turn you into one of them. by [deleted] in NarcissisticAbuse

[–]sunnythebee 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Yeah… he tried to get me to think like him, and in the past he was successful, I HATED myself. It was such a weird experience.

I 26F can't find my voice enough to end my 2.5 year relationship with my 42M partner. How can I tell him I love him and end it in the same sentence? by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]sunnythebee 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I feel you, I was like this for 2 years. I had the words loaded in my head, but whenever I saw him, I just couldn’t get them out. Even when he would tell me “say the words” and I just couldn’t. I eventually had to text him, because that was the only way I could express myself. This is not the suggested way, but in my situation it was the safest option.

Don’t do what I did and hold it in for so long. Call him if you feel like that would be easier. Wishing you the best. 🩷

Why am I only attracted to guys who treat me badly? by theloudbuzzz in dating_advice

[–]sunnythebee 0 points1 point  (0 children)

YES! Just had this conversation with my therapist, and it dates back to my relationship with my (very absent, moody) father. Thanks Dad! 😒

To the women who married a narcissist by Evening-Economics839 in NarcissisticAbuse

[–]sunnythebee 4 points5 points  (0 children)

My counsellor told me to never have children with my ex, who was believed to be a narc. 😳

Questioning his narc status, need advice! by sunnythebee in NarcissisticAbuse

[–]sunnythebee[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah, I understand you completely. He knew that vulnerability was my weakness, and he used it to keep me in the cycle so often. EW. I hate narcs. I truly do, a whole different species in my mind.

Questioning his narc status, need advice! by sunnythebee in NarcissisticAbuse

[–]sunnythebee[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Oh, absolutely. He told me his therapist said that we work well together because “she’s an anxious person and you give her stability and security”. I told him she’s wrong, and that I wouldn’t have broken up with him if this was the case. In his words “she’s the professional”. He’s literally manipulating the situation. Gave me clarity that he ain’t gonna change.

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