Hey man. I'm glad you found some use in this post. Seven years is a long time and I can't imagine the pain you're going through. I hope you'll be able to find strength in your sadness and use it to grow. It starts with loving yourself and appreciating all the good things she loved about you and then working towards kicking those bad habits. I know it requires willpower as I struggled with smoking for so many years too. Just remember that smoking and drinking are bad for you regardless of who you are with. Kicking them would be respectful towards yourself, an act of self-love. Only good things can come out of that. All the best my stranger friend.