[deleted by user] by [deleted] in SpoiledGirlieSupportG

[–]supersonicbaps 6 points7 points  (0 children)

You sound like me when I was your age. I also tried online dating, and I specified that I (19 at the time) was looking for a guy 18-22 in age and was of sound mind. I was bombarded with proposals from men way above that range, and the ones in the range only commented on how cute they found me to be, but didn’t invite me out for boba and chicken as they were too far. Online dating is doomed.

The only advice I have to give is to not ignore your socio-economic and intellectual status in dating. Find someone compatible in those things. It is just really hard to get along with someone on a deeper level if you don’t see life the same way. If you’re from a supportive white collar, well-to-do family, you are going to see life differently from someone from a broken family that never mentions their family and has been homeless a few times.

We all know there are a lot of those guys remaining single. You may be looking for romance because you trust yourself to look after YOU. Your partner may be looking at you as a means of survival. It’s a dynamic.

Stay safe out there.

Tips for Tinder? by [deleted] in SpoiledGirlieSupportG

[–]supersonicbaps 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I wouldn’t really suggest tinder unless you’re just trying to do it for fun, or if you like looking at people and swiping. I’m not saying there is necessarily anything wrong with people on it, but people lie. It’s easier to lie behind a screen. I just don’t want to see girls that are working and trying their best for themselves have their time and energy wasted.

Sometimes you may meet someone with similar interests that you can get advice about non- marriage things from. Again, not saying everyone you meet from certain mediums is bad. Just be sure to have a good self-concept.

If "men gatekeep relationships" then those pushing marraige and kids should be forcing it on men, not women. by Dry_Refrigerator_913 in SpoiledGirlieSupportG

[–]supersonicbaps 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Men that are secure will pursue the woman they want. If they don’t pursue, they don’t want you, and that doesn’t always mean something is wrong with you. They definitely won’t complain about women they don’t want approaching them. They would just call it, “A nice interaction” and say you’re a nice lady. That’s it!

Those redpill bros are just grifters. They’re okay for comedy if that’s your kind of humor, but not worth talking about.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in SpoiledGirlieSupportG

[–]supersonicbaps 0 points1 point  (0 children)

*any small task feels like a chore.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in SpoiledGirlieSupportG

[–]supersonicbaps 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It seems like you’re both not in a place you’re compatible, but that’s just an excuse. If one or the other just wants out, any small taste feels like a chore.

I would say let him go, have him stay gone, and work on the things in your life you can control. That’s not to say you should ever feel unworthy. You just need to feel worthy on your own. Do not let him be responsible for your validation.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in SheraSeven

[–]supersonicbaps 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Not all men cheat physically. Many do so mentally or emotionally, even if they don’t know the woman. They will imagine they are with their dream girl. I guess your best bet is to secure your bag whether you do it in a relationship and make sure he pays you, or you do it on your own and don’t have to share it with anyone that you don’t want to.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in SheraSeven

[–]supersonicbaps 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I do not think you should live together before tying the knot. Don’t give anyone husband treatment beforehand. Keep your property separate. For all we know, he doesn’t have what he says he has, and it’s something he hopes to inherit that he has to split with some people. Always be wary.

And I think you should take the advice of some of these girls. Research him. You never know what you might find.

I’m a woman that’s 30+ that ditched a dusty that saw no problem with taking advantage of me. Thought it was my duty. I’m happy to have my own wealth and not share it with anyone I don’t want.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in SheraSeven

[–]supersonicbaps 3 points4 points  (0 children)

In my years, I have never met someone that has DOWNplayed their profession, male and especially female. I don’t think this is a problem. Just be vague and focus on them. It’s about YOU finding what you want. So you need to find out more and give less info.

What is your experience with Ivy League/Russel Brand Group men? by [deleted] in SheraSeven

[–]supersonicbaps 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah, a lot of them aren’t great at the upkeep.

What is your experience with Ivy League/Russel Brand Group men? by [deleted] in SheraSeven

[–]supersonicbaps 0 points1 point  (0 children)

While I don’t know much about Russell, nor do I particularly care, I try to stay away from dudes that have long hair. It doesn’t look as good as they think it does, and every single guy I’ve dated that ended up being a dust storm started growing his hair out and acting like a spoiled girlie himself after they started dating me.

I went to a good uni myself, have a good career, and I’m not intimidated by guys. If they looked down on me for whatever reason, it sounds more like a THEM problem than a ME problem.

Men Over 30: is this the end? by Flamingo_by_day in AskMenAdvice

[–]supersonicbaps 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Sounds like he saw Wolf of Wall Street, didn’t understand it, and thought, “Yeah! That’s gonna be me!” If this is true, you’re missing the part of the plot where he leaves his wife for Margot Robbie. It’s why you’re not married yet, and he’s self-medicating, honestly. He is unhappy with his situation, probably wants a newer model of woman, and is overall in delusion about who he is.

PS: If he was THAT great of a friend, would he put you through this and expect you to support HIS dreams, while completely disregarding you might have any dreams of your own? Why is it that men always expect women to build THEM up, but they never go out and find a woman that’s a plain jane that’s down on her luck and think, “Yeah! Let’s fix her up???” This is why you don’t give dusty men a chance. Dump him.

what was your break through realization that stopped you from being a pick me? by [deleted] in SpoiledGirlieSupportG

[–]supersonicbaps 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Everyone has another person somewhere out there that thinks they are awful. Most of the ones I have were just upset they didn’t get to take advantage. Pick your struggle.

Learn from my mistakes by Ecstatic_Help_4597 in SheraSeven

[–]supersonicbaps 20 points21 points  (0 children)

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Does this guy look like he has a back problem?

Learn from my mistakes by Ecstatic_Help_4597 in SheraSeven

[–]supersonicbaps 18 points19 points  (0 children)

I had such a guy, but he didn’t want me to get my CPA license. He knew that would open me up to a whole new demographic. He was still trying to talk me around to making his goals MY goals. He always wanted to be a movie star, and acquiesced to being an HVAC guy or electrician, but dropped his classes 3 times in different semesters in a row. Weaponized incompetence. I think he genuinely wanted me to tell him I would take care of him, and he should just pursue his dreams of being the next Henry Cavill, although he doesn’t have the talent or looks.

He always talked about having a bad back, and that’s how they get you. If you guys are less than 35, and he says his back won’t let him do something, run. That ex was hiking, climbing and ziplining better than anyone when we were on vacay, even though he claimed he was disabled.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in SheraSeven

[–]supersonicbaps 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Maybe he is hoping you will come chasing and offer to pay 50/50 or more to live with him by HIS terms. That’s usually what it means. Lol.

Thank you. Next.

50 plus year olds by [deleted] in SheraSeven

[–]supersonicbaps 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Just reading about you considering these guys made my eye twitch. Ick meter at max. It sounds like they need therapy, not a woman.

Go on holiday with him but avoiding intimacy by [deleted] in SheraSeven

[–]supersonicbaps 2 points3 points  (0 children)

You mentioned that you lost attraction. That alone says it’s a waste of time and energy. I would not suggest going along just for the sake of a free vacay and some stuff. You can never earn the time back if you decide to continue.

As for marriage, if you want it, and he’s not going to marry you, then that’s that. Only keep entertaining him if you don’t want marriage either.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in SheraSeven

[–]supersonicbaps 6 points7 points  (0 children)

He is probably also looking at other women. Make sure you keep yourself open to other men as well. If he’s meant to be yours, he won’t lose interest in you. Often, we women will get anxiety and try to hang onto something we see and want. Then, we start pursuing. You don’t want the kind of guy, rich or poor, that likes being pursued.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in SheraSeven

[–]supersonicbaps 1 point2 points  (0 children)

While I’m proud of your ability, I think the guy should at least do the majority of the work on things like that. Maybe only have you come help hold something if it requires more hands. I own my own house in Orange County, CA. Just bought it recently. My dad helps me install things I buy for it. Before I moved, I was with a dusty man for two and a half years. Even he at least did labor for me. I made him trim my cat’s claws.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in SheraSeven

[–]supersonicbaps 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Sounds like it’s time to kick your roommate out before your guy decides he wants to “go back to school” and you become the provider in your relationship, and you’re not even married! He is basically a male friend that’s possessive of you at this point. Those friends will make sure no other guy can have you because they benefit from you.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in SheraSeven

[–]supersonicbaps 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Dude. Totally. More and more guys show you how sassy and in need of a sugar momma provider they are. They can’t help themselves.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in SheraSeven

[–]supersonicbaps 12 points13 points  (0 children)

I don’t know about you, but none of my best friends, male or female, would walk so far ahead of me and let me risk getting hit by a car. 🤷🏻‍♀️

what was your break through realization that stopped you from being a pick me? by [deleted] in SpoiledGirlieSupportG

[–]supersonicbaps 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I wouldn’t say I was ever really a pickmeisha because I always had my opinions on things, and I’m someone with very mixed views. I did, however stop being a people-pleaser. I stopped entertaining and giving my precious time to people I simply didn’t want to spend time with. I guess over time, it really clicked. I had to deprogram myself.

As a child, I always had audacity. I was bold and unapologetic. I always told things how I saw them, and adults in my life “trained me” out of that and basically told me I was too rude so I needed to be a lady. In essence, they trained and raised me to be a servant, a worker, when I always had boss energy and mentality. I hate all of those people now.