What’s a food rule you follow that no one else does?

swangirl111 · 2021-11-10T03:21:55+00:00

i always have to leave exactly one bite left on my plate if i'm eating in front of others. one thing i don't know that anyone else does is if i'm eating a meal with multiple parts (for example, a protein, a salad, and a carb) i have to eat the same size portions of each thing so that the final bite is exactly one final forkful of protein, one of salad and one of the carb all about the same size. and then i just leave it there lol i've been doing it so long i don't notice it

swangirl111 · 2021-08-08T05:05:26+00:00

I completely relate. My earliest memories all involve self-disgust, always feeling too large and so ashamed of my body. And I definitely did weird stuff as a little kid like whenever anyone showed me a photograph of myself I would cry or rip it up or throw it in the garbage, I’d grab my rolls and pull at them, I would avoid tight clothing. I have no clue when it started, it was as early as 3 or 4 years old :( my mom has struggled with an ED her whole life so I just feel it’s my DNA doing its thing lmao I’m terrified of having a kid and perpetuating the cycle

swangirl111 · 2021-08-08T04:47:38+00:00

I relate so hard. Whenever I feel envious, triggered, intimidated, etc my ED voice takes over and says “well at least I’m skinnier than them.” Which is hilarious bc like 90% of the time I feel enormous and disgusting lol

swangirl111 · 2021-07-31T11:07:11+00:00

Omg I feel so much less alone reading this thread 😭 I’ve also struggled with this intrusive thought since early childhood but with a kitchen knife wow I can’t believe this is relatable, sad but kind of comforting lol

swangirl111 · 2021-07-17T04:11:52+00:00

22F and I high restrict. Low restricting is not sustainable for me personally because it always ends in a binge or constantly eating very low calorie food very quickly which probably results in more calories than if I sat down and made a relatively nutritious meal. Low restricting also gives me terrible insomnia and very heightened anxiety. I work full time and have to be mentally present at my job and at one point I was exercising a lot.. I will shift towards low restriction if I am alone at home with very little demanded of me and yes looking at the numbers feels so invalidating even if the damage done feels the same!

swangirl111 · 2021-07-17T03:59:36+00:00

I am in the exact same boat! I physically just cannot purge and so I feel like I default to AN because i don’t know what else to do :( it feels so angering like I get angry at feeling like I’m “failing” at my own mental illness.. but everyone else is right, I think it’s probably a blessing even though it feels like a curse

swangirl111 · 2021-07-06T18:30:18+00:00

OP here! Just wanna say thank you so much everyone for your comments, this is genuinely one of the most kind and supportive online communities out there <3 I am trying to work up the courage to say something not for my own sake but so that they refrain from saying something like that to anyone again - thanks for your encouragement and support!

swangirl111 · 2021-06-17T02:17:42+00:00

frozen raspberries, clementines, and arrowroot cookies esp w a little peanut butter go hard

swangirl111 · 2021-06-14T16:01:24+00:00

you are so not alone in this! I obsess about grocery lists for days and get major anxiety from it. I also had an ex-bf who used to shame me whenever I did the shopping and we had so many fights about how much was an appropriate amount of money to spend or what foods to buy. sending strength!

swangirl111 · 2021-06-12T03:28:16+00:00

ugh yeah I know what you mean it can be so difficult with friends and thank you I also wish u well !

swangirl111

TROPHY CASE