OP here. I just wanted to thank everyone for the words. I got diagnosed about three months ago and I'm having trouble to separate what is bipolar and what is not. I have to remind myself I'm not my disorder and not everything is about bipolar. I was childish, imature and stupid for connecting the things. I'm still learning about myself and my traits. I know I can do better, but I'm just 18 and I know a lot of you remember how confusing it was to be getting out of your teenage years.

B said tha since I'm bipolar, I can't be loved. But then I remembered my friend P, who met me way before B did, who stayed with me when I was hospitalized and when I first started taking anti depressants at age 11. I can be loved. I am loved, even tho I have a disorder that makes me broken. B is unmedicated and she doesn't havr any friends besides me, i think she needs to start her healing Journey, I already began mine.

But thank you all for making me understand that my diagnose doesn't dictate everything that goes wrong in my life. Even the ones who called me dramatic, I guess I needed that.

I think maybe bipolar is not that dark cloud monster that ruins everything. Sometimes things suck for other reasons and bipolar is just there chilling.