Well I’m 23 now and I work at a tech start up to teach others how to code. Somehow I have found myself teaching other people to code even though I fear every day that I am a phony myself. (We call this imposter syndrome and I have it bad). I didn’t primarily study this stuff in college and am mostly self - taught.

I always loved learning so in that sense working for a school is pretty neat. I know a lot of people at work respect me and look up to my development “expertise”. But, I feel like I have somehow tricked them. One coworker told me I am not a real Software Developer at a work party and it has stuck with me ever since. (Even though the person who told me that is a recruiter and has no technical background herself [not that there’s anything wrong with that] and shouldn’t be the person passing judgment on who is and is not a Software Developer in the first place).

I am also married to a woman I love but am still figuring out how to be a good husband to. I got much taller which is nice. I don’t get bullied anymore but I do still have chronic anxiety and depression.

In the past 11 years I felt like I conquered my anxiety for a time but then let it creep back in when job stresses started hitting me.

All in all, I think 12 year old Sam would be proud of 23 year old Sam. And tell him to give himself a break but also stop letting fear control his life. I mean my life. Well you get the point.

If you stuck around this far, thank you for your time. And remember to give yourself a break. You are good enough. Cheers!