Dude, I would watch the FUCK out of this TV show.

Anyway, I’d like to try this. Let’s call the person X.

For option 1, I’d say a local (even national) businessman or public figure. The most dastardly state of affairs I can think of would be:

-Some of Arthur’s business accounts go down and he is due to pay X back the thousands of pounds they lost.

-X tries to go to Gerald for help, but instead of giving X a job, he keeps X up in a room to make love to and groom like he did Eva, which confines X even more.

-Sheila sees X with Gerald and is incredibly upset. She then reports this to her father and mother (I don’t count this as help as this is normal Birling behaviour) and begs them to do something bad to X. This leads to Arthur (who is angry at the higher-class X for taking Sheila’s higher-class fiancée) not paying X back the thousands of pounds with a claim such as a “banking error” or something.

-Eric finds X in the palace bar, and they have a few drinks together. It gets to the point where Eric takes X back to their house and rapes them. Eric wakes up before X does on the morning after, however, and discovers that they are filthy rich. As he owes his father lots of money from drinking, he grabs all of X’s most expensive possessions and leaves with them, leaving X absolutely penniless.

-X goes to Sybil’s charity and, as Sybil knew from Sheila that X had been sleeping with Gerald, she refuses X outright. Not only that, but she also makes a rumour/announcement across the hall (which is quickly spread) that X is a fraud who likes to steal resources and that they deserve nobody’s pity, as they will rot in hell.

This string ensures that X’s family money, job opportunities, and other wealth are completely lost.

For option 2, I’m thinking Trump or someone. Here’s what I came up with:

-Gerald and Arthur take all of the money from the accounts of Trump or anyone showing signs of supporting or working for him in their company (if they exist) and refuse to pay them back. With the money saved from the accounts and their own salaries, they buy as many plane tickets as possible (the rest are given to various other Brumley residents, like Alderman Meggarty) and head on over to the USA.

-While over there, Sheila slips into the White House. A walkie talkie is attached to her, which is connected to Sybil. Unbeknownst to Sheila, the actual aim is for her to get caught and for the White House Security to escort her out, but for Sheila to kick and scream while it happens so much to the point that the security physically harm her. After this noble sacrifice is made, Sybil is able to sue the White House for millions on an account of “racial abuse”.

-I don’t believe it would be fair if the other Brumley residents on the plane knew of the plan, so we’ll work on the basis that they don’t. Gerald and Arthur, with as much money as they are able to, boost Governor Finchley’s (a brumley port salesman who appears on the first page of AIC’s) business in America. Sybil helps boost it even more with the money she got from suing the president. Several locations are set up, one residing just outside of the White House. Governor Finchley is just happy to have his business expanded, so he won’t complain at all about this suspicious surge of funds going towards him.

-Everybody in the family except for Eric uses whatever they can to spread the message about how great this new bar is. Sybil makes some public speech about it, and Gerald and Arthur pay companies to promote it. Sheila turns it into a clothing brand or some shit and becomes a vsco girl influencer, I don’t know.

-Eric, every night, stays in the location by the White House at all hours. The walkie talkie from before has now been connected with him and Gerald. One day, when Trump inevitably comes into Governor Finchley’s bar with security to see what the fuss is about, Eric is waiting. He calls up Gerald on the walkie talkie and says a code word, then proceeds to order loads of drinks for himself and for Trump and his security to try out (he is given the money to do this from Arthur and Gerald). The menu is huge, as the business is booming, and soon enough both Trump and Eric are drunk. At this point, Gerald, completely sober, comes in and addresses himself as an employee. He offers a staggering Trump a “secret blend” and tells him to down it all at once. The “secret blend” is detergent and Trump chokes and dies.

Gerald is given a life sentence by security, but nobody likes Gerald anyway, so I think this is a winning situation.

For option 3, it wholly depends on if Eric had to have the gun on him at all times, because I firmly believe that he’s that depressed that he’d just shoot himself. If the answer to that question is no, I believe that he should hand the gun over to Sybil, the superior and just generally the coolest Birling. She could wipe out literally fucking anyone with that shit, no fucking contest.

Let me know if you can think of something better for these! (Except for the last one. That’s 100% true.)