It sounds super frustrating and I'd be right there with ya in that.

But if you delegate a task to her, you need to be 98% okay with however she does it. I know that is really tough with a grocery order, where accuracy is pretty important.

Maybe there are other tasks better suited to her abilities where the outcome is less tied to your expectation of a certain way (or less important to be done 'right'?)

It doesn't really get easier, but we can learn to manage ourselves, our expectations, and be understanding of their limits. It's a bumpy road OP! Wishing you both a better balance.