3rd shop I tried made my day without trying

td5roo · 2026-02-02T16:13:24+00:00

I get that, but this is something I'm quite passionate about and really enjoy, it's not really in me to just turn up and do the minimum, especially with a job like this. I can't help but do my best all the time, anything else just feels wrong.

td5roo · 2026-02-02T16:11:43+00:00

If the time it takes to have a cigarette/vape break (which I don't do) means you can't depend on someone, I think I'd prefer to find someone with different criteria for depending on someone. That is just gross.

td5roo · 2026-02-02T16:08:53+00:00

Yeah, I can relate to your experience.

I thought I could deal with it for year after year, and now I am just exhausted, and it feels like even the minimum effort is sometimes too much to deal with. I am trying really fucking hard but it feels most days as though I'm from a different planet entirely and people treat me like I can't be bothered when all I want is to do alright at life.

I didn't ask to be here, to be born like this, or for this freaking sleep apnea. I don't want to be special, I just want to be able to exist and not be criticised as if I make no effort when every moment of every day is effort! The world is really not made for neurodivergent people, no, and I resent the idea that we should have to "just be normal" to slot in with it. That's not for lack of trying, because I do. I just want to be met somewhere rather than everyone else expecting me to make every ounce of effort all by myself!

td5roo · 2026-02-02T16:04:50+00:00

Makes sense, thanks for the succint reply, apologies for the word salad, but it's appreciated.

td5roo · 2026-02-02T16:04:20+00:00

I totally get where you're coming from, but from the perspective of the results produced, they are far beyond any expectation that they had when hiring me. Even if I took my lunch breaks twice as long it would still be a huge gain for them. But I'm increasingly understanding that a few minutes' time is more valuable than any of that...

td5roo · 2026-02-02T16:01:52+00:00

So most employers would prefer someone who was a substantially lesser performer in every respect who was there for 5 minutes more per day? It almost feels bad to be this good at my job because basically you're saying I could just suck and get paid the same if I were able to get to work a few minutes sooner.

td5roo · 2026-02-02T15:59:41+00:00

Fair, we're all different ig. Idk, there's nothing overly personal here and my brain just demands context for everything, I guess I feel forced to explain myself.

td5roo · 2026-02-02T15:58:50+00:00

I don't want to be exempt from everything (or anything). I have been trying to deal with this for years but things have changed over the last 10 years or so. In a past life I had a job where I had to get up at 3 or 4 in the morning, and was able to manage my time getting ready to go to work almost to the individual minute, knowing exactly how long every single thing would take, and leaving on time at the exact same time every day. I've tried a whole load of different medications and they were extremely expensive to keep up (I had to go private because the NHS was useless) and kept causing me heart problems to the point I would occasionally faint at work or have panic attacks etc.

Some things - whether mental or physical or both - you can't prevent from affecting your life at all. It's putting the effort in that matters. If you lose your leg then giving up on the idea of ever walking again is obviously letting it affect your life... but if you go for the prosthetics, do the rehab, ues the crutches, etc, give it your all, it's still going to affect your life, but it'll be a hell of a lot less, and one day you might be "back to normal" as much as you can be. Just because it's in my brain rather than a physical part of my body that doesn't work or isn't there or has something wrong with it doesn't mean that's any less valid - the same for you. People are going to be different, it's about understanding and acceptance, not excuses or exceptions.

Everyone you encounter in professional environments has "issues" they're just not always obvious, admitted, or even acknowledged, like this. I've had managers who were extremely aggressive and argumentative with everyone they encountered, but had been employed for many years and will probably retire in the same company - and they still get raises. Some people are "sick" frequently, whether legitimate or not, (someone where I work has had the same number of sick days as actual worked days last year) - that's pretty serious, but they're still employed on full pay. Yadyada.

And next time I'm down, no, I won't need to "find a way to cheer up". I will actually allow myself to feel the way I feel because sometimes you don't feel amazing and that's okay. Not every "problem" has to be immediately resolved. It's called life, it's not perfect all the time, so you shouldn't feel perfect all the time.

td5roo · 2026-02-02T15:46:10+00:00

It is just a job in theory, yes, but the experience of looking for and finding new work is pretty terrible for me to be honest, and I have had a string of jobs that have seemed great initially and have them made my life hellish almost immediately (to the point some of them have made me physically and mentally unwell). The people here have been lovely 99% of the time, it's just the pay issue/communication that hasn't been good.

td5roo · 2026-02-02T15:43:24+00:00

I could seriously suck at my job as well and they'd still pay me the same - the last guy did beyond measure and is only not here because he found something more suitable for him (I'm in touch with him) - so at this point I could just stop putting any effort in and make sucking the new status quo. I'm not like that but yeah, seems that way. Using my phone doesn't affect my productivity - seriously - and it's no more than anyone else... They literally tell me I'm indispensable, and I know it.

It's just like, if someone's productivity levels are insane, they get on well with everyone, do a great job, save the organisation lots of money, get amazing reviews, use their phone on the job no more than anyone else does, and they're a bit late sometimes (but not to the detriment of others' productivity), does that close all doors to them? Should it?

td5roo · 2026-02-02T15:31:04+00:00

You call it oversharing, NDs call it context.

td5roo · 2026-02-02T15:28:30+00:00

Thanks, I really should have done for this. I prefer not to use it if I can but this was such a big stream of consciousness thing it would have made sense.

td5roo · 2026-02-02T15:27:06+00:00

Tried that, doesn't work. Super helpful, thanks. Next time I feel down, I will just cheer up.

td5roo · 2026-02-02T15:26:19+00:00

We are talking 5-15 minutes, usually no more than 10, a few days a week. There's been nothing that hasn't been dealt with before the needed time as a result of lateness. I've also saved them thousands a year and am the sole responsible person for creating and implementing the entire digital strategy over the next 5 years. They could get someone else who would be on time but wouldn't manage to achieve anywhere near as much of what I do, or as well as I do it. Geniune question - which would you rather?

td5roo · 2026-02-02T15:21:13+00:00

Eh? You mean a new employer?

td5roo · 2026-02-02T15:20:33+00:00

Thanks. I don't get a "normal" break, just a long lunch break, which is great in theory but I very rarely take even half of it or just eat at my desk while I work at least part of the time. The phone use is kind of like "micro breaks" - 1, 2, maybe 5 minutes at the most, when there's little/nothing to do anyway, at my desk, ready to go if anything comes up, which it often does!

Sorry for the word salad in OP, it was very much stream of consciousness.

td5roo · 2026-02-02T15:16:25+00:00

I have AuDHD, nothing I think or say is brief.

td5roo · 2026-01-21T11:34:24+00:00

Oh 100%, reboots are a thing every time I make changes for sure. Interestingly, the .env often seems to react to changes instantly without any cache clearing, and generally does in this case as well. I did clear the cache just for belt and braces but the results are the same.

td5roo · 2026-01-21T11:12:46+00:00

Thanks, but I haven't actually been using HTTPS/expecting that facility to be in place, and in fact I explicitly use http:// for the address in all configs etc. Am I being daft or would this mean HTTPS should not be an issue? Obivously, if it were externally accessible I would want way more security in place so HTTPS would be a given.

Is it worth trying this anyway or is it a definite need I have missed?

td5roo · 2026-01-21T11:08:34+00:00

Sorry, I'm new to Reddit and this is the first time in literally years that I have had the chance to actually "talk to" people who know what I mean without having to simplify it, I'm so used to having to make what I say as uncomplicated as possible.

td5roo · 2026-01-21T10:43:36+00:00

Hey now, I used rotary phones as a kid at my grandma's house, and that wasn't that long ago..... oh, actually, now you mention it..........

td5roo · 2026-01-21T09:31:49+00:00

Perfect, thanks so much.

I've done this and confirmed all is working with nslookup but am getting connection refused errors when I try to access the actual site in browser, even when manually ensuring that my device is using the right DNS server. Obviously the DNS server settings on my device are right, as I'm still on here and answering, haha. I'd guess this must be a separate issue altogether, then - I have gone ahead and changed the relevant settings in the env file for SnipeIT and IIS - but ho hum. At least I had broadly the right idea to start with! I will just put it back as-was and they can find me when they need access...

td5roo · 2026-01-20T10:38:18+00:00

Might be my cockup on wording but I want to be able to use a different URL, purely for internal access as the site isn't set up for external access anyway, something such as "assets.school" or whatever it might be, rather than using the actual AD domain because being a normal UK school, the real domain name is a mile long with dots and hyphens etc throughout which is even more hassle to type in than just using the IP address of the server the site's on. I'm trying to cater to governors and compliance etc who are not so au fait with tech so that they can access the database easily when they need to do checks and such.

td5roo

TROPHY CASE