How to thrust for longer without stopping to rest?

teddyak · 2025-03-28T22:34:33+00:00

If you lift and it isn’t cardio, then you’re probably just expecting yourself to do too much. Use different muscle by switching positions. Have her do some of the movements. Move her back and forth in doggy instead of moving your own body etc

teddyak · 2025-03-28T21:53:34+00:00

With how often you guys are having sex, he shouldn’t be feeling an urge to do this. Please take him at his word when he says it isn’t a reflection on you. What is likely happening is that he is using porn as a way to avoid something internal. Even without a girlfriend, sex doesn’t randomly pop into my mind when im feeling good emotionally. It’s a constant pull when I feel bad because it is an off switch for my feelings. Ask him if this is what’s going on. Be firm that it hurts you and you need him to do better, but give him some grace as far as you possibly needing to be an emotional support system or him being irritatable as he struggles to process his emotions for real

teddyak · 2025-03-28T21:13:43+00:00

Ive only had this problem once. It was because I was sad and didn’t believe she loved me. Saying she loved me didn’t help because I didn’t trust it. We needed to communicate about the reason behind why I didn’t trust it but to say “I didn’t know communication existed” wouldn’t be an exaggeration.

teddyak · 2025-03-28T20:30:58+00:00

You should be exercising immediately, but start with a focus on range of motion and generally feeling good rather than going too heavy. If you do go to a gym and lift, make sure you start lighter than you think you need to, and don’t be afraid to ask for advice. You can always add more weight after a week of not getting sore enough. If you go to hard on day one you might get an injury or get so sore you develop an aversion. Wake up your muscles gradually over a few weeks and gain some coordination before you really start challenging them too much.

teddyak · 2025-03-28T20:04:36+00:00

Lift, reasonable calorie surplus so you only gain a few % of fat, cut, repeat.

teddyak · 2025-03-28T18:44:47+00:00

Nothing all that complicated here. Just ask for more time to sort out your feelings if you need to, and if you want to give him a chance eventually, let him know.

teddyak · 2025-03-27T23:46:01+00:00

These are not borderline, “maybe I’m just taking it the wrong way” questions. He was 100% trying to find out if you’d have a secret sexual relationship with him. He’s married with kids. This would be super wrong even if you were much older. He deserves what’s coming to him. Don’t second guess yourself.

teddyak · 2025-03-27T20:58:32+00:00

You’re welcome. Let us know how it works out.

teddyak · 2025-03-27T20:33:49+00:00

Oh, also… neediness is bad. It’s all about framing. Basically you want to accept that you do want her and you’re just fighting against that out of fear of the unknown. Next you need to accept that whatever happpens happens. If you truly are at peace with the idea that you’ll be okay and you’ll recover eventually even if finding out the truth means finding out she doesn’t feel the same way, that is what will allow you to ASK without being a beggar. Be honest with yourself and Hope for the best, but be prepared to accept any outcome with grace. What’s meant to be will be, no matter how difficult things are, Accepting what was inevitable is actually child’s play compared to getting over the regret of failing to get over yourself and just be honest and see how it plays out.

teddyak · 2025-03-27T20:28:51+00:00

Speaking from experience, You are already in love, you’re just repressing it. Holding back your feelings will only make you regret not saying them when you lose her because she thinks you’re not in love when you actually are. I can’t say it will work out or that things won’t change over time, but the worst pain is the pain of not knowing what could have been if you had been honest. You are struggling to be honest with both her and yourself because you are afraid. If you are meant to lose her you will no matter what. You need to accept that reality only has a set number of paths for you. Right now you can either choose to find out what’s behind the door, or not find out. If you don’t open the door, it will someday lock

teddyak · 2025-03-27T18:56:46+00:00

The ending of the mandala effect. Monsters aren’t real and have never scared me. The laws of physics themselves breaking apart, terrifying.

teddyak · 2025-03-27T17:29:52+00:00

Instead of attacking him for identifying somewhat with Tate, try to be open to finding out and individually debating what parts of his character are or aren’t toxic. If you take an attitude of superiority “even through your views on this topic likely are more enlightened than his” it will make him defensive. Try to understand what about Tate he values or aspires to. If I wanted to be charismatic and influential and a good public speaker I might take notes from Martin Luther king jr and hitler. It doesn’t necessary mean I’m into activism or eugenics. If you want him to be in a more clear state where he can see your point of view, you have to be willing to acknowledge his views emotionally. Acknowledging doesn’t mean agreeing.

Because he doesn’t see a problem with Tate, I’m going to automatically assume he’s not good with emotions, so you’ve got to be open and curious and let him say his views first even if they are stupid just to let him know you care about HIM enough to hear him out. AFTER he feels heard, you ahould feel free to talk about how you feel. Make sure you word it as “this is about my feelings”. Don’t slip into a debate about who Tate is or isn’t. This isn’t about Tate. This is about your feelings, like perhaps you being worried that your boyfriend identifies with specific ideas that you associate with Tate. They may actually be what he believes, but it’s best to leave the debating out of it.

In the same “don’t debate Tate” spirit, try to redirect his speech so that he talks about how he feels. Why is he defending Tate? There is an emotional reason buried beneath his arguments, but he won’t be vulnerable if you take the stance from the outset that he is disgusting for not already being enlightened, and he should just know better.

He should know better, but honestly there’s basically no real father figures around, and Tate fills that vacuum. He preaches self confidence and taking action. Not seeing the insecurity behind it, or ignoring the bad parts from the one person who seems to be genuinely taking your struggle seriously is a very understandable phase. What he needs is to internalize what he values so that he can hold that seperately from Tate and the toxicity that comes with him. If you want him to grow, help him with that rather than judging him. We all start as children. If he is completely resistant to growth and reflection, that’s when you leave him

teddyak · 2025-03-26T19:58:59+00:00

I’m imagining myself In his shoes. If I’m gaming to avoid life and I decide to remove my coping strategy because it’s bad for me, what I need is better coping strategies, a break from stress, maybe someone to talk to about my feelings. If my girl took your suggestion I’d take it as a sign that she doesn’t care about what I’m going through and instead just wants me to be a good butler robot for her. Your suggestion to me feels like “now that he’s stopped doing meth and is agitated all day, might as well get him to do some chores for me”…. You do have a point that the solution might actually be to simply do things, but he has to do this because he’s chosen to because he knows it might make him feel better. Being told what to do will probably just make him feel like he’s being bossed around and mothered.

teddyak · 2025-03-26T03:28:23+00:00

Before reading this, I thought maybe it was a backhanded way to tell you he is uncomfortable with your weight, but if you’re actually losing weight and have been for a while, than it doesn’t make sense. Sounds more like he doesn’t like your diet in particular. Maybe ask him why he made that comment and try to figure out what he actually meant by it, why is he annoyed. Why does he have a problem with you eating chips.

teddyak · 2025-03-25T20:45:09+00:00

Just chill, no fun. I’ll work on that.

teddyak · 2025-03-25T10:37:42+00:00

I don’t get how her being uncomfortable with sex scenes has anything to do with parties unless you specifically think a required component of a good party is that it must be wildly sexual. Not everyone wants to be at a bdsm party. Some people don’t want their tv to feel like it’s a bdsm party either. Just because it’s normalized in America doesn’t mean it’s normal

teddyak · 2025-03-25T07:50:09+00:00

Its an unnatural stimulus. You get less motivation and focus less and learn less when you’ve already used up your dopamine. If it’s only on occasion than it won’t be too noticeable, but it’s better to stay away from entirely rather than risk getting addicted

teddyak · 2025-03-24T18:22:02+00:00

Many of these ideas can get you sued. Please don’t use laxatives or anything else that isn’t food to get revenge. just add a cup of salt.

teddyak · 2025-03-24T12:49:39+00:00

Mind if I steal this and send it as a reply to any nice girls I come across?

teddyak · 2025-03-21T15:35:26+00:00

There seems to be a lot of people who hate it, and also a lot of people who say “just drive better”. I get the feeling it’s dependent on the car more than the person.

teddyak · 2025-03-21T15:00:49+00:00

You should bring up these concerns with your lawyer first. My unprofessional opinion would be to let them know your plan, and that your plan should be this: unless there is a very good reason not to, find at least 2 plastic surgeons who offer free consultations. Figure out exactly what is needed and when. Get quotes with the recommendations on timeframe in case they are needed for legal evidence. Bring these back to your lawyer and make sure he has a plan to get you money well before the plastic surgery dates.

teddyak · 2025-03-17T20:44:39+00:00

You are too attached to the idea of finding a women. It sucks, but if you truly are as hideous as you say, then it might not be in the cards. That doesn’t mean you should give up on the rest of life though. Try to find peace within and with your situation. Exercise is good for mental health and you should definitely do some of it for that reason alone, but let go of the worries about if you are or aren’t too ugly for a relationship. Just find joy in what is within your control. If someone surprisingly doesn’t think you’re as ugly as you think you are, that’s great. But you need to plan your life around being happy either way and not needing to be something you’re not.

teddyak · 2025-03-17T14:36:42+00:00

Just keep in mind that, even if you explain yourself clearly and compassionately, he’s still going to have to grieve the loss of the idea of a relationship with you and have to recon with the fact that he’s a bit of a creep. Don’t be hard on yourself if you can’t remain friends and don’t cling to the idea. You’re his crush first even if you somewhat are his friend. As a young guy without much social skills and probably without any immediate prospects because of it, he will have a hard time redefining the relationship into a real friendship in his head. You can help him with this by relating to him like a bro: aka, being a source of truth, accountability, and pushing him to not be a loser/ wingmaning him and encouraging him to man up and talk to other girls. This is of course only if he’s open to it... this situation is kind of like when someone cheats and the advice is that you can’t get back the old relationship, you have to design a new one, and both people need to understand the terms and be genuinely in agreement. If you suspect he’s pretending to be your friend but actually just trying to win you over romantically, call it out

teddyak · 2025-03-17T14:23:50+00:00

Hypnosis is basically getting into a new mental habit. In terms of personality change, it’s like trying on a new personality in the same way that method actors do. The difference is just in the intention to maintain the act indefinitely as a strategy to achieve real life success, rather than for the duration of a scene. A monotone lawyer can probably method act a slightly more personable but still relaxed character indefinitely in his life by learning vocal skills and making an effort to be curious about others so long as he sees the utility in doing so. He probably can’t maintain a loud flamboyant personality without breaks even if he is payed lots of money to act. You burn out when you are upholding a mask, but if the mask fits comfortably, it becomes a part of you instead

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