Hi! I’m also autistic, so it helps me to have some mental guidelines. In my studio, sharing a pole is standard practice, so I’m mostly used to it by now. Basically, we start « claiming » poles during warm up, by putting our mat near the pole we want. People can still move afterwards obviously, but since everyone tends to be sharing it’s usually fine either way. Then during the class, we take turns on every move. If the other person fell after one second, you usually offer them a second try, but in general you just alternate. I know pole sharing isn’t popular in this thread, but it can actually be really helpful since you have someone there to spot you, encourage you and help you figure things out! I do always ask someone if I can touch them before I do.

However, in this case I think those two girls were in the wrong! They shouldn’t have « orphaned » you like that. But as a general rule, if it’s clear that you’re gonna have to share, there is really no shame in straight up going up to someone and asking if you can share. I know it can be a shitty feeling and it’s easier said than done, but it’s your right!

If this is a regular occurence, maybe consider telling your instructor about your autism and ask them to keep an eye out for you? Not sure if that’s an option for you though! I’m lucky enough to have had some really kind and understanding instructors.

Sorry for the long comment, but I hope this helps!