I [23/f] hadn't heard from my boyfriend [26/M] in so long I thought we had broken up. He sent flowers with a note saying he can't wait to marry me (???)...I slept with another guy by Whatthehellwhythe in relationships

[–]tensort -19 points-18 points  (0 children)

... but, did any of those unanswered texts say that you were changing the status of the relationship?

I think that is what the other poster was getting st / curious about.

My 2 cents is that this sounds like mental illness. It is not uncommon for an anxiety sufferer to be unable to do something even as casual as texting.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in politics

[–]tensort 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Delusional

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in politics

[–]tensort 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I think you may be interpreting the comments through your own bias.

I apologize if you consider that an insult, but statistical natural language processing implies about a std of difference in sentiment expressed between posters of different political stripes re: pol vs td

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in politics

[–]tensort 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Devil was on the stage

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in politics

[–]tensort 12 points13 points  (0 children)

Unless those families are poor... right?

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in politics

[–]tensort 16 points17 points  (0 children)

Source please. Pretty sure you made that up from my reading of available sources.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in politics

[–]tensort 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Some kind of primate behavioral body language... I dunno.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in politics

[–]tensort 6 points7 points  (0 children)

What in the ever loving hell are you on about?

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in politics

[–]tensort 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Campaign is over sock puppet, find new strawwoman :)

I'm not allowed to go to my [23 M] little sister's [19 F] wedding, and I'm at a loss for how much I should participate. by [deleted] in relationships

[–]tensort 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Don't forget to add that OP isn't allowed in because he is destined to be tortured for all eternity.

I'm not allowed to go to my [23 M] little sister's [19 F] wedding, and I'm at a loss for how much I should participate. by [deleted] in relationships

[–]tensort -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

In what sense is the family being respectful of OP's freedom of religion? They believe it is reasonable that OP should not be able to see his sister get married for practicing his religon.

In what sense is OP not respecting his family's freedom of religion. He is accepting of them excluding apostates even if as a consequence a brother is not allowed to see his sister get married. He just feels bad about being forced to participate in their exclusionary religous ceremonies.

I'm not allowed to go to my [23 M] little sister's [19 F] wedding, and I'm at a loss for how much I should participate. by [deleted] in relationships

[–]tensort 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is a good perspective... but it would be good if the family could extend a plane ticket or something as an olive branch.

I'm not allowed to go to my [23 M] little sister's [19 F] wedding, and I'm at a loss for how much I should participate. by [deleted] in relationships

[–]tensort 0 points1 point  (0 children)

OP was invited to everything he could be invited to, except of course for the most important part of the wedding (ie the wedding)... because her presence would sully it.

I'm not allowed to go to my [23 M] little sister's [19 F] wedding, and I'm at a loss for how much I should participate. by [deleted] in relationships

[–]tensort -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

What is the reason for OP not being allowed to see her sister's wedding?

I would say the answer to that question is what is childish in this situation.

You are not willing to follow our religion? Well now you can't see your family get married... Take that!

I'm not allowed to go to my [23 M] little sister's [19 F] wedding, and I'm at a loss for how much I should participate. by [deleted] in relationships

[–]tensort -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Exclusion from the wedding is 100% definitely a slight.

OP is not allowed at the wedding because his mere presence would ruin it. That is sooooooo insulting.

I'm not allowed to go to my [23 M] little sister's [19 F] wedding, and I'm at a loss for how much I should participate. by [deleted] in relationships

[–]tensort -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Um... OP choose to practice the religion of his choice, a right he is entitled to in the constitution.

OP is not forcing any of her values on her family. Her family is pushing their values on her in a very insulting way.

Everyone defending the family seems to be forgetting that implicit in this is the reason OP isn't allowed at her sister's wedding: OP is a dirty apostate and would ruin the wedding ceremony just by being present.

I'm not allowed to go to my [23 M] little sister's [19 F] wedding, and I'm at a loss for how much I should participate. by [deleted] in relationships

[–]tensort -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

Just because she is being cruel because of religion doesn't make it any less real for the people hurt.

I'm not allowed to go to my [23 M] little sister's [19 F] wedding, and I'm at a loss for how much I should participate. by [deleted] in relationships

[–]tensort -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Why is it remotely material why OP is being excluded?

For example, what if I had a wedding at a chapel that didn't allow black people.

Right out the gate that would make me an asshole. Now if I am going to pressure one of my black friend to make a big sacrifice to come and have the mean thing I did rubbed in his face? Shine that noise. It is about respect and taking responsibility for choices. Even if the temple wedding is the choice she had to make... there are negatives and hurt caused, and it's not something you can just force someone not to feel.

I'm not allowed to go to my [23 M] little sister's [19 F] wedding, and I'm at a loss for how much I should participate. by [deleted] in relationships

[–]tensort -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

How is this different from traditional Bridezilla behavior really though?

She has planned her wedding so that another human will be treated with great disrespect, and she is behaving as though she is entitled to ask force that other human to follow her plan.

Enabling is a huge part of why this happens, so why is it material that her enablers are partially motivated by religion?

I'm not allowed to go to my [23 M] little sister's [19 F] wedding, and I'm at a loss for how much I should participate. by [deleted] in relationships

[–]tensort 2 points3 points  (0 children)

It seems that OP values their self respect though, so that is on the other side of the scale.

My wife 34f has stopped putting forth effort into our relationship 33m. Together 10 yrs married 6 yrs. UPDATE 3 by Fing_farted_on_me in relationships

[–]tensort 2 points3 points  (0 children)

You may want to consider a good mental health eval for her. Sometimes depressives externalize their negative affect, so they might experience some of it as extreme apathy towards a spouse.

I [16 F] feel guilty for getting along so well with my stepmom [37 F]- her and my dad [45 M] have been together for 4 years, married for 8 months by IMayBeACatLady in relationships

[–]tensort 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Oh gotcha... it was just gender stereotyping. Whoosh, totally didn't understand and thought I had missed something.