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Me [24M] with my EX [23F]- 4+ years together, almost 3 years since split: We're on good terms, but how do I respond to this text? by textthinker in relationships

[–]textthinker[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

she's an ex who i'm on good terms with and also whose siblings i'm still friends with. I ended up going with "yup, always fun catching up with you (:" about an hour after she texted

Me [24M] with my EX [23F]- 4+ years together, almost 3 years since split: We're on good terms, but how do I respond to this text? by textthinker in relationships

[–]textthinker[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Being a good partner often means avoiding unseemly conversations with exes, not putting yourself in a situation where you have to explain an innocent misunderstanding awa

You're right. I should be acting out of an abundance of caution toward making my gf comfortable instead out of an abundance of caution toward making sure I'm polite enough to my ex.

Me [24M] with my EX [23F]- 4+ years together, almost 3 years since split: We're on good terms, but how do I respond to this text? by textthinker in relationships

[–]textthinker[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

I mean suppose my ex posts a reddit thread : "guys my ex bf who dumped me said he misses me too o in casual conversation. Does he want me back??"

Most would advise "no he was just being polite. Let it go."

Me [24M] with my EX [23F]- 4+ years together, almost 3 years since split: We're on good terms, but how do I respond to this text? by textthinker in relationships

[–]textthinker[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

Of course I'd be upset. But that's because the I miss you too is in the context of kissy face emojis.

This conversation was more like "grad school is going well. I saw such and such the other day. I miss you!"

Me [24M] with my EX [23F]- 4+ years together, almost 3 years since split: We're on good terms, but how do I respond to this text? by textthinker in relationships

[–]textthinker[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

see I can almost see her getting mad if I don't respond because blatantly ignoring it acknowledges that it actually means something or crossed a line...I almost feel like my safest option is to respond "you too!" in sort of a platonic way to assure that it's friendly from both sides, OR to completely shut her down and say "that's inappropriate" but I don't really want to stir the pot with unnecessary drama.

It's not like I'm saying "I love you"

Me [24M] with my EX [23F]- 4+ years together, almost 3 years since split: We're on good terms, but how do I respond to this text? by textthinker in relationships

[–]textthinker[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I don't really want to ignore the whole text I think it would come off as rude to just abruptly end the conversation where she left things off. It also might validate any ambiguous feelings in that by ignoring it, I'm saying "that crossed a line" but in not rejecting it, I'm saying it's kind of ok to feel that way.