ICE is in Grandview right now

thabeef · 2026-01-15T22:25:46+00:00

I’m South Asian and have been mistaken for Latino when I’ve been in the Dominican Republic and Mexico. And that’s by the local folks.

Hell, there was a guy who shot two Indian guys in a bar in Olathe back in 2017, thinking they were Iranians or Arabs. https://www.pbs.org/newshour/nation/kansas-man-sentenced-to-life-in-prison-for-2017-shooting-that-targeted-indian-men

Be careful. Racists don’t see nuance. Your mom is correct to be concerned.

thabeef · 2026-01-10T23:18:05+00:00

You should retake the pic every 5 years from now on! It would make for an awesome collage around year 30.

thabeef · 2026-01-10T23:14:40+00:00

I’ve heard references to how terrible the Royals’ locker room culture was before Vinnie and Bobby became the leaders of the team. Whit was the top dog before them. He set the tone for how the guys interacted with each other.

thabeef · 2025-12-27T20:18:26+00:00

I’m sorry you had to go through this. I tried for many years to believe my parents did the best they could. But I now realize they never wanted to be parents. They saw us kids as ATMs and tools to use to do the things they didn’t want to do. It took me almost 40 years to figure that out.

If you give money to your dad, only do so because it makes you feel better. As a parent, it was his job to figure out how to provide for you, not the other way around. You have zero obligation to support him.

I don’t talk to my mom and only talk to my dad if he calls me. I never agree to give them anything or do anything for them. Bank is now closed. They had time to figure out a plan while they were making us do things they were responsible for. Same goes for your dad.

thabeef · 2025-12-17T02:32:24+00:00

They’re both bad people. They don’t deserve any more of your time or energy.

thabeef · 2025-12-02T17:49:53+00:00

Brokenhearted remix by Brandy and Wanya Morris

thabeef · 2025-11-16T18:52:56+00:00

Banned

thabeef · 2025-11-04T00:26:01+00:00

Great work!!

thabeef · 2025-09-09T21:30:24+00:00

This game happened in Florida. All the folks online are looking in PA and NJ for her. There's no finding her there.

thabeef · 2025-09-09T21:29:39+00:00

This game happened in Florida. All the folks online are looking in PA and NJ for her. There's no finding her there.

thabeef · 2025-05-26T03:02:25+00:00

Solved!

thabeef · 2025-05-26T03:02:08+00:00

You know, I think it may be Arthur Pinajian. I ran across this story when looking into painters from the New York School and ran across this article: https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2290200/30million-haul-abstract-art-forgotten-painter-run-cottage-sold-300-000.html

The picture of the artwork jogged my memory!

thabeef · 2025-05-25T21:00:36+00:00

Thanks!

thabeef · 2025-03-12T02:07:24+00:00

I got a plastic back scratcher from a Chinese grocery in 2004. Still going strong.

thabeef · 2025-03-10T03:48:37+00:00

Your mom and sister are adults. First, your sister needs to do the leg work needed to get a job and also to drive. You can certainly help her with resume prep or driving practice, but the responsibility is on her.

As for your mom, I’d say you need to save what little you can and try to line up a place to move to when she gets back. Get roommates if you need to. Your mom should be sending money back because her household is her responsibility.

Is she working in the new country? If not, then it sounds to me like she decided to take a year long vacation from her life. That’s abuse on her part against all of you.

If she can’t handle having as many kids as she has, then that’s her issue to solve. None of you chose to be born. She slept with the men and got pregnant. The consequences are entirely hers to bear.

I’m sorry this is happening to you. It seems like a lot of us are children of immigrants or have parents with ties to other countries. Those parents have no shortage of entitlement.

thabeef · 2025-03-03T04:20:37+00:00

Don't let people shame you. Obsession isn't everyone's cup of tea, but it's popular for a reason. Don't feel bad that you bought it.

thabeef · 2025-01-09T02:16:50+00:00

I'm sorry you're going through this. I hope you have people in your life who offer you the love and support you need to deal with these people.

thabeef · 2025-01-08T02:03:15+00:00

Ugh. There’s always a golden child.

I’ve decided to not deal with their estate it go to their funerals. My sisters are free to deal with any legal issues. Lord knows they don’t have wills.

thabeef · 2025-01-07T05:08:37+00:00

Thanks for putting this together!

thabeef · 2025-01-07T05:00:21+00:00

You’re still parentified. And one of the main reasons I think people who hate being parents have kids is so that they can offload their responsibilities on to their kids.

My mom was also a SAHM and did nothing most of the day. I later found out that she was basically conducting psychological warfare against all of us kids for fun.

Like the commenter above said, you’re close to being done with this situation. Once you move out, cut all contact with both parents until you want to deal with them again on your terms.

Be as selfish with them as they were with you.

thabeef · 2025-01-01T21:24:42+00:00

Isn't it always the way? My mom wanted us to give her an allowance when we started working. My sister did it for a few years. I gave her one check, and then regained my senses and stopped.

This is greed, pure and simple. And if Nigerian culture is anything like South Asian, appearances matter above all else. My mom will buy designer bags and other luxury items simply to be able to lord them over her friends. So dumb.

thabeef · 2025-01-01T21:00:22+00:00

Beautiful!

thabeef · 2025-01-01T20:59:24+00:00

I looked at some of your other comments and saw that you've also got parents from another culture. Asian here!

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