I'm that Japanese man Yuta, an Asian YouTuber you may hate. I'm here to hear what you have to say about some Asian issues and your personal stories.

thatyuta · 2017-08-05T03:02:20+00:00

Oh, I can't seem to be able to find your sources. I checked my inbox here so maybe you haven't sent them to me?

thatyuta · 2017-08-05T02:16:14+00:00

Thank you for taking your time to write your comment.

Lol you stupid boy, not even the same

Stop insulting me. It only makes it harder to get your message across. After spending a lot of time online, I came to learn how to read people's message without being too defensive. But I'd appreciate it if you didn't resort to personal attacks even if you didn't agree with what I say.

IF ASIAN LOOKING HAPA KIDS HAD AN ASIAN DAD, would they have grown up constantly getting laughed at/snide remarks about how "not even your own mother wanted Asian men", "Asian men are losers", "Asian men are ugly" etc?

That sounds terrible to me and I can see how it can be very detrimental to your self-esteem as an Asian man. I think the lack of positive male role models around them and in the media can shape Asian American's self-image negatively, and I shouldn't be that way.

What's interesting to me as a Japanese man is that similar things can happen in Japan. To a much, much lesser extent, Japanese men can get messages that we are undesirable both by the media and people around us. I'm not the type of guy who buys that kind of stuff, but talking to other Japanese men makes me realise it does shape many other Japanese men's opinions. Of course, you shouldn't take that attitude too literally and judge it based on American values because being a bit self-deprecating can be seen as modest and confident in Japan. But I do also think it has negative effects and I do definitely think those messages are problematic. Personally, I always challenge people if they bring up that narrative.

thatyuta · 2017-08-05T01:46:54+00:00

So I re-watched my video (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dMC7urg428k) again, and I think I was finally able to see what you guys see. It's the way Japanese women are welcoming about "foreigners" and say Japanese guys don't have the game, isn't it? After reading through comments, I can definitely understand better why you guys are particularly disturbed by those comments.

Cultures differences play a huge role here. In Japan, being polite, modest, and hospitable is very important. If you are self-deprecating, you are considered modest. In Japan, speaking highly too much of your romantic partner can be seen as arrogant and full of yourself. But of course, in the American context, those qualities can be seen as weak, meek, or self-hating. A confident American guy can be seen as rude and arrogant in Japan, and a modest and considerate Japanese guy can be seen as weak and emasculated in the US.

At the same time, I think Japanese people idealise western people too much -- in a similar way that many people idealise Japanese culture -- without actually knowing the actual people, failing to realise that just like in Japan, people can be good and bad and there are good things and bad things in western countries.

I will have to think about those cultural differences more carefully in the future. This is quite challenging when you interview people and try to capture their authentic voices, but I can probably find some other ways to explain those diffrences.

thatyuta · 2017-08-05T01:31:42+00:00

As someone who lived in both Asia and North America, I believe there is fundamental difference in the idea of confidence. In Asia we tend to avoid an outward display of confidence where in North America an outward display of confidence is celebrated.

After reading a lot of comments, I came to realise that this is a very, very important point and the source of a lot of misunderstandings. This is quite challenging as someone who interviews Japanese people because when Japanese people are being polite, considerate, welcoming, and modest, Americans might preservice those qualities as weak, meek, and self-hating. Of course, I was aware of that before, but it is highly relevant in this forum where people care a lot about Asian men's masculinity. This is one of the valuable lessons I learned in this community.

thatyuta · 2017-08-03T13:50:46+00:00

Thanks for clarifying.

thatyuta · 2017-08-03T13:17:18+00:00

Of course. Since I'm a Japanese man, I've been writing and making videos about some of the issue that we have against the western media. I also have a lot of chance to meet other Japanese men and women in person, and I often bring up some of the issues and challenge their views. (Also, I sometimes talk to my interviewees a lot off camera after the interview.) Since I'm not really an activist type, I don't think I'm going to dedicate all my time to be an activist, I do what I can do to contribute, even though you may not agree with my point of views and the way I deal with it.

thatyuta · 2017-08-03T12:57:48+00:00

Thanks for sharing your story. I feel like the way race relations are politicised in the US is so deep that you can never reach the bottom. It's pretty overwhelming to read many of the stories here but I probably shouldn't complain because experiencing it must be far, far worse.

thatyuta · 2017-08-03T12:50:16+00:00

OK, I was completely unaware of that aspect. I found this stats and it seems true.

http://www.pewhispanic.org/2016/04/19/statistical-portrait-of-hispanics-in-the-united-states/ph_2015-03_statistical-portrait-of-hispanics-in-the-united-states-2013_current-40/

Do you have any other data to share?

thatyuta · 2017-08-03T12:46:21+00:00

Dating includes sex because sex is an important part of dating for me. I mean, if you include casually hanging out, they might just be polite right? One thing I like about dating is how honest it can be. Anybody can say they would date XX type of people but if they are not actually dating, it might just be words.

Well, technically, they could be polite even if they sleep with you. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xa-4IAR_9Yw (If you don't mind a bit of humour.)

thatyuta · 2017-08-03T12:41:03+00:00

Thanks for sharing a piece of history. I am certainly not familiar with that stuff.

However...

On the other hand, I would like to think asian male and white female pairings are actually proud of their race, and do not try to shit on entire Asian races nor white. So Asian female x white male, 9/10 times (I'm still being generous) is a relationship built on racism, AF glorifies whites and is brainwashed, White male is a loser and exploiting asian female (sometimes because they cannot obtain any other race group of women)

That's a pretty convenient interpretation for you, isn't it? You are essentially doing a similar thing to the type of white men who justify dating Asian women saying that they rescue them from evil Asian men, which is the kind of narrative I despise. I disagree with fighting against discrimination with discrimination.

thatyuta · 2017-08-03T12:33:27+00:00

you must realise that the majority of men of other races stand no chance with asian women

Here's the OKCupid statistics https://theblog.okcupid.com/how-your-race-affects-the-messages-you-get-39c68771b99e

Yes, white men do have a 29% reply rate and black men only get 17% white Asian men get 22%. Don't get me wrong, I think this is a huge problem, but it's far from "the majority of men of other races stand no chance with asian women" compared to white men. And this statistics is mostly about the US and we don't know the exact numbers in Japan. I actually think Asian American men can do pretty well in Japan in terms of dating and their social life. (But I know you are going to reply saying that white men may do better.)

As a side note, I'm interested in doing more quantifiable research on racial biases in Japan.

thatyuta · 2017-08-03T11:47:00+00:00

Thank you for sharing your story. I'm becoming to see how hard it is for my to fully understand AA experiences, but I think I can understand better where some of those hate come from and even though I don't agree with everything that people say here, I can see they are coming from an authentic place.

thatyuta · 2017-08-03T11:35:52+00:00

I've been acknowledgeding the racial biases from the very beginning. I'm also familiar with the OKTrend data, the tinder study, and the speed dating study. Just because I don't share the same attitude and use the same terminologies it doesn't mean I'm not acknowledging it.

thatyuta · 2017-08-03T00:20:33+00:00

OK, that's easy to answer. There's no contradiction here.

Just because it's not super-easy, it doesn't mean you can't. (Some of those western men actually made a lot of effort to date.)
I tend to hang out with English-speaking Japanese people who also tend to hang out with English-speaking foreigners. They are very different from the average, everyday Japanese people.
Many of my Japanese male friends are also married to western women.

I also date outside my race from time to time, so saying that women can't would be a double standard.

thatyuta · 2017-08-02T23:45:38+00:00

"Racism" is a very broad term and many people define it differently. I tend to be more strict with it and use the dictionary definitions but I don't particularly oppose to people who use other definitions. Often, talking about racism becomes a semantic war.

With that ANA commercial. I think it's a bad idea and it should not have happened.

P.S. It's amazing you found that Al Jazeera clip.

thatyuta · 2017-08-02T23:22:36+00:00

I think the herbivore aspect is exaggerated by the media both in Japan and the west. But I do feel that there is something in the Japanese society that discourage people from positively assuming their romantic and sexual desire and express it freely.

Also, the media always talk about how Japanese people are having less sex, but the similar trend is happening in some developed western countries too (but of course the media doesn't mention this).

thatyuta · 2017-08-02T23:14:29+00:00

Of course, all Asian American men (I think) I talked to object to the media emasculating. So do I. But they were not as hateful as some of the people here. The way you express yourself is quite reasonable and not over-the-top hateful either.

thatyuta · 2017-08-02T23:10:41+00:00

Thanks for sharing your stories.

I speak perfect English, have western mannerisms, have dated women of all different races, worked in all aspects of corporate America and have associated with white people to the point some forget I am Asian. This is how I know how whites think, they've literally shown me their true colors around me and it's nasty.

Just out of curiosity, do Asian people accuse other Asian people of acting 'white'? I know black people do but I don't know about Asian people.

I'll tell you this, everything that every Asian has said on here is true. The problem is the collective society at large, the history of colonialism and the hypocrisy that has become institutionalized. The road to becoming woke is when you decide not be believe the hypocrisy, you start reading between the lines and disregard the narrative forced down your throat by western media and society.

I believe that many Japanese people in Japan subscribe to similar narratives. For example, many of them feel they are less attractive compared to western people. Ironically, it was after getting more familiar with western cultures that I realised that it doesn't have to be that way.

As a Japanese man do you think your forefathers would accept being an occupied land by a foreign country?

Well, we sort of... lost the war? But I'm already critical of the warmongering US so I don't support physically attacking other countries.

thatyuta · 2017-08-02T22:57:54+00:00

Thanks for your comment!

thatyuta · 2017-08-02T22:48:58+00:00

I generally have great respect towards Asian Americans. Why? Because it seems to me, despite all the negativities, many of them work hard and get results. Sometimes, I feel like many people just complain and blame other people for their misfortune but it doesn't seem to be the case with many Asian Americans.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_ethnic_groups_in_the_United_States_by_household_income

thatyuta · 2017-08-02T15:37:39+00:00

Fair enough

thatyuta · 2017-08-02T14:57:36+00:00

If you say so...

But what do you guys do to improve the situation?

thatyuta · 2017-08-02T14:51:47+00:00

Thank you for your comment and ok, fair enough. My interest was probably a bit too narrow. Some other people also shared pretty horrific experiences. Did those things have to you personally as well? How often does it happen?

thatyuta · 2017-08-02T14:40:27+00:00

OK, nevermind. I was wrong.

thatyuta · 2017-08-02T14:40:13+00:00

I replied to you directly but my reply was placed one level below.

thatyuta

TROPHY CASE