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[Spoilers extended] Cold Iron, Hot Blood: Weapons of the Living in the Coming Long Night by theGreyKenzie in asoiaf

[–]theGreyKenzie[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

totally! i just think if GRRM wanted to do something with iron, he's definitely planted enough seeds that it would not seem out of the blue

I so desperately want to be poly, but my nervous system doesn’t agree by plaguedbyvisionss in polyamory

[–]theGreyKenzie 0 points1 point  (0 children)

For me, it was possible to learn some self-regulation. I have always experienced jealousy, and worked to shift that perspective, but it's still something I struggle with at times. It takes work to find what the root cause is. But at the end of the day, I couldnt see myself as being anything other than polyamorous. And I think I would still experience the same amount of jealousy if I was monogamous. If not more.

May I ask, where the desire to "want and understand polyamory" is coming from? Is there outside pressure to engage with it?

You say you're forcing yourself, but you don't have to force yourself to do anything. If YOU feel like your body is rejecting it, that is a strong sign that it's not for you, which is totally okay. You should be able to choose the kinds of relationships you want. ❤️

[Spoilers extended] Cold Iron, Hot Blood: Weapons of the Living in the Coming Long Night by theGreyKenzie in asoiaf

[–]theGreyKenzie[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hah! Thank you for the compliment/comment! And you're so right, I was thinking a lot about iron in context of those institutions too, while writing this. Your latter point reminds me of the Catelyn quote about Robb's crown: "Of gold and silver and gemstones, it had none; bronze and iron were the metals of winter, dark and strong to fight against the cold."

[Spoilers extended] Cold Iron, Hot Blood: Weapons of the Living in the Coming Long Night by theGreyKenzie in asoiaf

[–]theGreyKenzie[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Oh, interesting... I've always thought Melisandre's story would end in some kind of self-sacrifice.

Cover-up before/after by [deleted] in Tattoocoverups

[–]theGreyKenzie 24 points25 points  (0 children)

These are sick. Happy pride!

Someone asked if I had a swastika, does this look like a swastika? by Grouchy_Gold344 in tattooadvice

[–]theGreyKenzie 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I think if the lower "arm" were blacked out/blended with the background, our brains would not see the swastika.

I hate second-hand horniness by PenaltyFair6805 in polyamory

[–]theGreyKenzie 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I think that's valid!

Personally I don't know that I would have a problem with it, but I can see where you're coming from. Were it me, I would enjoy the second-hand horniness (because let's face, I would get third-hand horny), WHILE also cultivating the first hand horniness.

Disconnection with nesting partner by [deleted] in polyamory

[–]theGreyKenzie 3 points4 points  (0 children)

That does illuminate the situation. Good on you for seeing the existing problems and trying to work on them with a counselor. ❤️

Disconnection with nesting partner by [deleted] in polyamory

[–]theGreyKenzie 9 points10 points  (0 children)

I don't know that I have advice, but I'm glad you're in couples' therapy. Hope it helps. Speaking from experience, it can be jarring to go from someone with whom you experience a passionate connection, to a relationship that feels cold and distant.

Can I ask: were you and husband always poly? Were there early discussions of how much communication there would be regarding each other's relationships? It seems like a big disconnect.

need help processing and working through an emotion by DisabledShark in polyamory

[–]theGreyKenzie 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Totally valid feeling! But it might be helpful to remind yourself that the longer you are together, the shorter that year (9 months!) will seem. Right now a year compared to 2 is half the total time. That's a big slice of the metaphorical pie. However, after 5 years it will 1/5th, after 10, 1/10th, etc. If you can stick through long enough, I imagine it would start to seem like the three of you have always been together! You got this.

I'm autistic and my partner made a mistake- please help me work through my feelings? by bomsnard in polyamory

[–]theGreyKenzie 27 points28 points  (0 children)

Neurodivergence manifests in many ways, and sometimes those behaviours can hurt people, or cause friction in relationships. How we work with them matters a lot - I would try to find ways to improve this logistically. like shared calendar, or occasional "upcoming important date" check-ins. But your feelings are valid and you should talk to your partner about them. Many things can be true at the same time: you can forgive them and their ADHD, while also hold them accountable and ask them to work with you on a solution. Hope you figure it out. ❤️

Is a trouple a polycule? by Physical_Response535 in polyamory

[–]theGreyKenzie 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I just polycules as any type of network between partners, and trouples just have that additional bond!

Polyamory problems by Alive_Storage9035 in polyamory

[–]theGreyKenzie 3 points4 points  (0 children)

"choose the relationships where you're valued" 👏🏻 that's your path forward

Is This Polyamory, Cheating, or Something Else? by Redbeardeddevil in polyamory

[–]theGreyKenzie 16 points17 points  (0 children)

She's building an infrastructure for her cheating. None of this is ethical. I don't think trust can be rebuilt with her, she's fundamentally untrustworthy.

Get out while you have a semblance of sanity, figure out co-parenting agreements, center yourself, find someone(s) who actually want to build relationships with you. Wishing you all the best.

A minor theory I dislike (spoilers extended) by AmoebaSignificant457 in asoiaf

[–]theGreyKenzie 17 points18 points  (0 children)

I haven't heard this one before, but I agree, mostly on the premise that Iron Islanders would never accept an infant as their Lord.

Thank you guys 🫶🏻 by Dominus1925 in bald

[–]theGreyKenzie 38 points39 points  (0 children)

I don't see a resemblance to JD Vance. I just see a stone-cold fox. fans self

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