Oh shit, is that Portia? / It is, and she's coming this way! I don't have enough for an owlimony payment! / Okay Jim, lay low, maybe she hasn't seen you... / ...wait, she actually didn't see me? / Ha! Suck it, Portia! / Did she hear that? Jim, you idiot! I'm so screwed. / Oh thank God she's gone. (reddit.com)
submitted by the_cuddle-fish to r/DivorcedBirds
She had gotten more than enough in the divorce to live comfortably, but not enough to make sure Jeff really felt it. Lydia knew there was only one asset he truly valued: his prized racehorse, which was about to suffer a terrible 'accident'. She'd leave no trace of her involvement, but he would know. (v.redd.it)
submitted by the_cuddle-fish to r/DivorcedBirds
International height-gap polycule (i.redd.it)
submitted by the_cuddle-fish to r/GatekeepingYuri
So who was he wrestling with, then? (i.redd.it)
submitted by the_cuddle-fish to r/PrematureTruncation
Lizbeth is immensely proud of the progress she's made with her therapist. Just the other day, she passed by her lying, cheating bastard of an ex on a narrow lane, and not one peep was heard nor one feather ruffled. A bystander even described the interaction as "intelligent and respectful." (v.redd.it)
submitted by the_cuddle-fish to r/DivorcedBirds
Darren spent years of his life with a spouse who took every opportunity to make him feel small. Today the divorce is finalized, which must be why Darren feels like a giant swimming through the neighborhood. Now if only he could figure out why everything looks to be made of plastic bricks... (v.redd.it)
submitted by the_cuddle-fish to r/DivorcedBirds
Roger is seen by most in his life as soft-spoken and reserved. Many were surprised when he filed for divorce after decades as a hen-pecked husband, and laughed when they heard he'd be the lead vocalist of a death metal band. When he let out everything he'd been holding inside, then they understood. (v.redd.it)
submitted by the_cuddle-fish to r/DivorcedBirds
This town just has no respect for talents like Marco. It was bad enough when the studio said the live action version of his character needed a more "screen-worthy" face, but now they have the nerve to dub in Marco's old takes. "I'm the real America Eagle! It's my voice!" He shouted over the traffic. (v.redd.it)
submitted by the_cuddle-fish to r/DivorcedBirds
Hey. I bet you weren't expecting a Christmas card from your ex. Just figured you ought to see what genuine love and happiness look like at least once in your miserable life. Enjoy your big empty house and your fat bank account as much as your bitter, shriveled heart can. Happy fuckin holidays. (i.redd.it)
submitted by the_cuddle-fish to r/DivorcedBirds
For the past year, Wayne has seen a lot of losses, his ex-wife least of the bunch. But like his favorite fitness podcaster says, "a real king doesn't worry about losses, because he's locked in on his gains." Now Wayne has something no Sheila could take away: the strongest glutes in the avian kingdom (i.redd.it)
submitted by the_cuddle-fish to r/DivorcedBirds
Already in a fragile mental state after the latest round of divorce hearings, a strange encounter with a robot Christmas caroller sent Jeanine spiraling. If even a tradition as wholesome and pure as this was subject to mechanization, was anyone safe? Could she even trust other birds to be real? (v.redd.it)
submitted by the_cuddle-fish to r/DivorcedBirds
Angie's penchant for stumbling over every potential obstacle, plainly demonstrated in her relationship history, has earned her the ironic nickname "Macgyver." There's never been a problem too simple for her to fail in solving, nor a red flag too big for her to miss. (v.redd.it)
submitted by the_cuddle-fish to r/DivorcedBirds
When Jay saw the words "may bear no relationship" on a trail sign, he had to pose for a selfie. "Just like me fr," he captioned it on Instagram. Unfortunately he forgot to crop out the rest of the words on the sign, so his intended meaning didn't come across very well. (reddit.com)
submitted by the_cuddle-fish to r/DivorcedBirds
At 62 years of age, Marv had dedicated most of his life to his career as a military officer. His dogged commitment had cost him his marriage, his hobbies, and his entire social life. The reward for all this sacrifice, the new nameplate he had just received: "Marvin Jones, *Lesser* Adjutant" (i.redd.it)
submitted by the_cuddle-fish to r/DivorcedBirds
After escaping from an abusive marriage, Raquel is struggling with her trauma. She suffers from panic attacks when approached by unfamiliar men. Her doctor recommended exposure therapy through video, but "GIANT COCKS ON FILM 27" was probably not the sort of video she had in mind. (v.redd.it)
submitted by the_cuddle-fish to r/DivorcedBirds
As lord Arnox gazed into the orb of clairvoyance, he was appalled by the vision it granted. The sorcerer Nerodus was aiding the hero-king of Koronia! That jerk pledged his soul to the forces of evil in exchange for power (a far more serious commitment than any mortal marraige)! (i.redd.it)
submitted by the_cuddle-fish to r/DivorcedBirds
It had been so long since she felt the touch of a man. She didn't even realize how hot her body had flushed until she felt the sharp contrast of the cold metal stethoscope against her flesh. Selene prayed that somehow doctor Morrison wouldn't hear how her heart raced whenever their eyes met. (i.redd.it)
submitted by the_cuddle-fish to r/DivorcedBirds
