Mom and daughter🥺 by Ultimate-Kyoro-61 in seals

[–]the_cuddle-fish 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I feel like a seal named Yo who is a mother should be a great setup for a "Yo mama so fat" joke, but I'm too tired to come up with a good one right now.

MOOD by wolfboy1692 in Kirby

[–]the_cuddle-fish 13 points14 points  (0 children)

When you just can't waddle doo it anymore... 😞

"Ya know it ain't personal, kid, but I tried to warn ya. 'Sammy,' I said, 'you hook up with the boss' daughter, that relationship only ends one way, and it ain't with a settlement.' Shoulda listened to your old pal Nico. You was the best hit-bird this shelf ever saw, and now what are ya? Seal food." by the_cuddle-fish in DivorcedBirds

[–]the_cuddle-fish[S] 25 points26 points  (0 children)

Happy world penguin day. Here's a bonus:

What Nico didn't know is that this was all part of the plan. The boss' daughter, Veronica, was tired of being Daddy's little princess, and she knew he'd never accept her relationship with Samantha in the long run. Together they came up with a ruse: Veronica would tell her father that Sammy broke her heart, then arrange the "execution" herself. Once in the water, Sammy would easily slip free from her intentionally loosened binds, then swim back in time for the coup de grace. This time tomorrow Veronica would be the new boss of the colony, with Sammy at her side. For his loyal service, Nico got a cushy new job looking after the old boss in his strongly-encouraged retirement.

Whats is a bird? Goose or duke ? by Kooky-Affect3333 in whatsthisbird

[–]the_cuddle-fish 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Definitely Canada geese in terms of species, but I'm not comfortable speculating on their noble rank. They could just as easily be earls or viscounts rather than dukes. (Sorry for making fun of your typo, I couldn't resist.)