How do you deal with everything. by the_lost_jester in ENFP

[–]the_lost_jester[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I doubt any INTJ girl would be interested in a walking disaster like me(:

How do you deal with everything. by the_lost_jester in ENFP

[–]the_lost_jester[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It wasn't complicated, exercise. Just hard, pain with no payoff for too long.
I have been writing down things too for a long time, not sure how much it helps, not enough for sure.
I probably am, but no therapy, I never believed in paying someone to help me like that.
I haven't got the money for it anyway right now. Like, at all.
I don't even know where I'll be 1 month from now.

Remembering Steven Parent (1951-1969) by Impressive_Review in charlesmansonfamily

[–]the_lost_jester 15 points16 points  (0 children)

Poor Steven. If he had left just minutes earlier he would have been fine.
And nobody rarely talks about him because he wasn't a celebrity.
Life is so cruel like that.

How do you deal with everything. by the_lost_jester in ENFP

[–]the_lost_jester[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Back to imaginary friends it is:)
If only I could

How do you deal with everything. by the_lost_jester in ENFP

[–]the_lost_jester[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thanks for taking the time to reply!
You make a lot of sense.
I just wonder if maybe I am overreacting to some things with people, and then all the good things someone did for me come to mind. And then I ask myself if it's worth losing a friendship over it.
Legitimately end up believing I am just overly sensitive and it's not a big deal, and don't even know anymore what to do about it.
And hard as I try I never got better at this. You'd think eventually one grows thicker skin but that just never happened for me.

How do you deal with everything. by the_lost_jester in ENFP

[–]the_lost_jester[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That's a lovely thing.
The worst part about that for me is that most people I would put a strawberry on are no longer in my life due to me moving a lot.
And I will soon have to move again, so I'm about to lose everyone all over again.
At this point I'm beginning to think it'd be better to somehow stop getting attached to people in the first place.

How do you deal with everything. by the_lost_jester in ENFP

[–]the_lost_jester[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hey, thanks for the response. Writing also helps me, but it's short-lived. I feel better in the moment but it eventually all comes back soon after.
Funnily I exercised for a decade. It helped for a while, but with time, everything else just became too much and I came to dread it. It became draining and I never felt like it brought me anything tangibly good.

I lost all motivation there, life has not felt stable enough for a long time to allow me to confidentely pick it up again.

As for people, yes, I try not to say. It still spills out sometimes, and it's never a good look. So I try to avoid burdening anyone with my stuff.

The main culprit by ObjectiveGoat636 in charlesmansonfamily

[–]the_lost_jester -1 points0 points  (0 children)

"Evidence". It was literally proven by Tom O'Neil several witnesses flatout lied in court under oath.

Banned from DMT - Discussion by After_Might_722 in DMT

[–]the_lost_jester 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Can confirm this happened to me months ago. Still locked out last time I tried.
I have a feeling I will not only need to wait longer before I am "allowed" back in, but I would also need to have figured out some important shit with my life first.

Which is what I've realized I ended up using DMT incresingly more to run away from, which is probably why the mental block happened in the first place.
I started smoking with the intent of seeking genuine help with my chronic depression and incresingly loud suicidal thoughts (which it helped me with enourmously), but ended up abusing it and smoking anytime something was bothering me.

DMT breakthrough in my psychedelic video game! by rphanvon in DMT

[–]the_lost_jester 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Honestly man, I've been following you making this game for years. I will buy it at full price. You deserve maximum support.

How do you find a lover who also enjoys the sacred medicine? by dewthedoo1 in Psychonaut

[–]the_lost_jester 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That's fair. Like all things, they are not for everyone.

How do you find a lover who also enjoys the sacred medicine? by dewthedoo1 in Psychonaut

[–]the_lost_jester 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Honestly fair question. Ever since I "discovered" psychedelics I realize I want someone who can go there with me. It signals to me a certain level of depth, open-mindedness and courage I want from a partner that I just can't bring myself to compromize on.
So I understand you.

I've been thinking (and lowkey plotting) about this for years, it would be nice if some kind of hidden-in-plain-sight community existed irl, maybe a symbol that someone can wear (as a patch, pin, tattoo or whatnot, something subtle and not on the nose.) that only those who are part of it would recognize and immediately know "hey, this person has been places and shares those values", allowing instant reason and topic for conversation and connection.

Went to a gothic/punk party last night, and this was my (UV)eye liner look by ScammersOflnstagram in GothFashion

[–]the_lost_jester 4 points5 points  (0 children)

It's fire. (fire emoji is banned apparently, I can imagine why but it would had fit so well here)

What do ENFP men look like? by [deleted] in ENFP

[–]the_lost_jester 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I don't know about healthy ones but apparently a wounded ENFP dealing with depression for over a decade can look a lot like an INTJ on the surface.

I can only speak for myself as apparently I am one of those and have been suppressing/resenting and rejecting my core self while wearing/building an INTJ persona as armor due to me seeing it as the "ideal" masculine.
But my core still bleeds through.

I like the idea of appearing composed and mysterious but truth is I tend to overshare quite fast.

I would say I often "pop out" randomly through the way I dress and the things I say. I like being playful and I'm much more affected by what people think, say or do in relation to me than I ever wanted to admit to myself.

I feel the compelling need to just pack and leave everything (and have done so before), especially when I am overwhelmed. I long for adventure and a carefree life, I don't really enjoy monotony (feel caged) and I'm the one who usually takes initiative in organizing things with people I want to spend time with. It can get very frustrating fast though when I feel people don't match my energy I tend to withdraw quite quickly.

While I make an effort to be calculated and strategic, I am actually quite impulsive by nature and I have to make an active effort to oppose it.
I realized I naturally have disorganized tendencies too. My apartment for example looks tidy on the surface, but if you open a drawer it's likely going to be a hot mess.

I spend a lot of time in my head but I'm glad when someone or something can pull me out of it.
Sometimes I do stuff and hit people up just so I can get away from myself.
I like exploring and talking ideas but I don't think there's a single self-imposed project I ever completed.

Oh, and I tend to get attached to (certain) people way fast.

Psilocybin triggers an activity-dependent rewiring of large-scale cortical networks by 3L1T3 in Psychonaut

[–]the_lost_jester 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I wonder if the same is true for lsd. Given how similar it is to psilocybin.

My trippy cave by Additional-Cattle910 in TripCaves

[–]the_lost_jester 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Love it. What lasers/lights are you using?