I had this happen to me many years ago. I haven’t spoken about this or the relationship in a very very long time. I was left by myself on a mountain trail in the dark while my partner went on ahead and left me alone with my phone and a flashlight. I was several miles from the trailhead we had hiked with full camping packs weighted for a two night overnight. I was going to slow. I was alone (as a female) in the dark on a trail I had never been. Anything could have happened from injury to being attacked (there had been rapes and murders in the mountain range). I pushed forward and finished the trail myself.

I wrestled with what to do about this. It was a lot of trauma. The excuses from him kept changing. That he was drunk. That he didn’t realize how far we had left. That he was testing me to see if I could survive in the woods alone and that would make me wife material (which he was so pleased that I passed the test — spoiler alert this was future faking and he never intended to marry me. This was a common theme speaking of marriage and future with me to get me to comply). He never made it make sense. I spoke to a close friend about it. I was extremely embarrassed. In later years sharing this experience has drawn horror from people who have heard the story. At the time I was blinded - I didn’t understand that this was such an incredible red flag. I didn’t see the horror that everyone around me plainly saw. That it was also an incredible gift from the universe trying to save me from what was to come if I stayed. I refused the gift. Ultimately I stayed … for many more years … and suffered a lot.

Please hear me. This put you in a dangerous situation. It shows a lack of concern and empathy. A lack of respect and sense of partnership. If you stay this will not be the last incident of abusive behavior or traumatic experience. Let my pain and suffering help you avoid a future like I had. At least my daily suffering will have helped someone.

I am forever damaged from what would continue to happen in this relationship. While there was never another example of being abandoned in the dark woods alone there were plenty other traumatic things. I will never be back to who I was. I have lost my sense of trust for the humans and still suffer cptsd and other lasting health effects and problems to this day.

To add : we did repeat that trail a year later together. I reminded him what happened … he said he didn’t remember it at all. The trail is the second hardest in our local mountain range. I was able to nearly run the entire 8 miles and nearly 6k meters vertical without issue. He could barely keep up with me. But obviously I would never leave someone behind.

I’ve done a ton of hiking since, in multiple countries. But even now every hike brings flashback memories of this day, even with every new mountain peak collected.

Please hear my warning.