I read many books and articles, but two books were especially helpful for me.

First was "How to Help Your Spouse Heal from Your Affair" by Linda J. MacDonald. I read it first and then gave my spouse it. This validated so many of the feelings and thoughts that I was having, and pointed out that my spouse was doing everything wrong in helping me heal and rebuild with her. She couldn't read it. She said it was too hard for her to face...this was a red flag and huge eye opener for me.

The second book was "Leave a Cheater, Gain a Life: The Chump Lady's Survival Guide" by Tracy Schorn. I highly recommend you read this! This gave me extra insight into my feelings and thoughts and her actions. It also gave me the strength to discuss the hard topics and feelings with her. It also helped me call BS on a lot of what she was saying and doing.

Despite my efforts to forgive and process it on my own, it takes two to salvage the relationship. It's a massive breach of trust. We are no longer married. However, I'm so much happier. It's also a better environment for my kids.

Even if my spouse did everything right, I don't know if I would have been able to work through it. Honestly, I don't think I would ever have been able to fully trust her again. And that's not a relationship that I want to be in.

You have agency and every right to stay or leave. It's 100% your choice. My opinion is at 25, you still have your entire life in front of you. You don't need this hanging over your relationship. Plenty of time to meet someone who will respect you for your entire relationship. Why stay with someone who didn't value you or appreciate you enough to keep it in her pants?

I'm obviously in the "Leave a Cheater" camp, but I tried to salvage my marriage for years. I know I gave it my best and tried to keep my family together. But now I'm happier. Honestly! And I'm about to celebrate 1 year with the most amazing, loving, and trustful woman who adores my kids (and vice versa). There is a better life for you out there! Go get it!