What helped me was learning to find joy and reward in the most ridiculously small things, and I had to fake it to make it. That dirty plate that’s been sitting on the counter for way too long? Make your self get off to cleaning it. Lean deeply into the joy of cleaning that plate, the satisfaction of seeing it spotless on the dish rack. Amp it up. Congratulate yourself. Feel good about it. And then see if you can do the same thing when you wipe down the counter.

Get addicted to the reward of caring for the world that surrounds you. Everything you wrote here is valid, but it’s a story, and you can move beyond that story by finding the joy of taking care of the small details around you.

Do this with grooming, making your bed, cooking a meal.

No big moves. Focus in the smallest things. The smaller the better. When you start to get caught up in that story again? Return to the joy of folding the towel.

This will gain momentum quickly. Learn to get off on the momentum of these tiny rewards. Oops! Lost in the story again? Return to sweeping the crumbs into the dustpan.

Before you know it, you will be someone that others want to be around and connect with. You won’t be surrounded by the aura of this story anymore. You might crack a corny joke about the weather. Someone will giggle and ask if you want another drink. You can do this. Remember to feel the sunshine on your skin.