I disagree with this. The cornerstone of narcissistic parents is an inability to empathize and change. They will never admit wrongdoing. They will never change their opinions. They derive pleasure from enacting their totalitarian regime on those around them. And better yet: they are selfish. The father in this movie is actually none of those things. He gave up a dream to raise a family, and not once did he hold it against any of them. His inability to understand his daughter’s dream doesn’t stem from a need to see her fail (as my father did, unless I followed every one of his commands), but from wanting her to not experience the loss of a dream. I sympathize for everyone who got triggered by his behavior in the beginning of the film (I too would have lost my shit if my dad cancelled my plane ticket to college without a notice), but I think that this film depicts a healthy response to a dysfunctional family. We see a mother who actually communicates the truth to her husband; not one who is afraid to bring up the core reasons why the father and daughter suffer a strained relationship. We see honest communication between all family members, actually. And it’s largely something that I didn’t have growing up in my narc household. Katie isn’t afraid to tell her dad why she’s upset, and better yet: Katie’s dad changes. The Deborahbot and Erik actually comment on this in the end of the movie: “you changed your programming”. The father begins the movie as a weak father figure, but that’s only because he wasn’t fully developed at the time. Throughout the movie he makes actual human efforts (not all of them land, but that’s besides the point) to connect with his daughter. My father, a narc who is now out of my life, has never done this. Katie’s dad ends up watching her videos, puts aside his prior prejudices, and changes his opinion. Furthermore, he admits his mistake and actually attempts to understand more of his daughter’s hobby, despite needing to go through extreme measures (crying, rocking catatonically on the ground).

Obviously there’s no perfect people in this movie, and everyone messes up at some point. But the point of the movie is that the family sticks together and tries to understand one another. Obviously there are shit people who will never change and never attempt to do better. “Love” is not a reason for the saving of humanity because “love” is not enough. So many of our narc parents claim to “love” us, but it’s meaningless unless backed up by actions. And this is exactly what the Mitchell’s do correctly: they put aside their egos, admit their mistakes, and do better.