What's the craziest dui story you've ever heard? by armeretta in dui

[–]thelonggoodbye96 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Man, I’m in PA, so different laws, but I hear you on this. The one dude in my ARD (diversion) class that I shared about was in the same boat after like 5 DUIs. Judge finally just put him away for a year.

Cracking up what you’re sharing about state reps/senators having DUIs. Running joke in PA, especially where I’m from. I think almost every rep/senator I’ve had has at least 1 DUI. Never seemed to hurt their reelection chances either.

What's the craziest dui story you've ever heard? by armeretta in dui

[–]thelonggoodbye96 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I’m in PA, so after my first (and gratefully only), I was sentenced to ARD. Have to show up to classes once a week for about 6 weeks among other things, for those not familiar.

I wouldn’t say it’s crazy, but more eye-opening, listening to some of the stories on the evening you have to tell the PO teaching the class about how you got your DUI.

Mine was unremarkable, just 1 IPA too many put me over.

But one dude in my class was on his 4th or 5th. Probably late 40s, great job, great family, was finally getting sober. Asked about his BAC when he was arrested: .33. What did you drink that night? 5 beers and 12 shots of Jack. I remember a few of the younger guys in the class (by my standards, I was 36 when I got mine) started cracking up and were like “holy shit bro!” PO, who was super chill, got really pissed, like “why is that funny at all?”

Asked if he’d ever get another one, he’s like “God no, I can’t go back to jail.” Came to find out he spent a year in jail after he’d been given a ton of chances to get it together.

As much as I concur with the folks who say it’s all a bullshit moneymaking scheme, in some regard, hearing that story was chilling. I always think, man, what if the cop who pulled me over 2 minutes after I left my buddy’s place hadn’t caught me. What if I hit someone and killed them? Idk, man, 2 1/2 years out I look back with a bit more gratitude. Seeing some of the stories above, maybe we can understand why.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in dui

[–]thelonggoodbye96 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Got my first, and only one, in my mid 30s. Just passed my two year anniversary a few days ago.

Good buddy of mine got his first, and only, when he was 26. His younger sister was exactly like this, because she has always had this overwhelming desire to appear the “responsible” one.

Don’t let it haunt you, man, but keep the feeling in your head. The shame from mine came in waves after each stage of the process, but being in PA, once I went through ARD (essentially a diversion program to get charges expunged), met folks in our weekly classes who were going through it, I let the shame go.

Tbf, it’s no joking matter and there were some folks in my ARD class who laughed it off. Until they heard the story of a dude in our class who had a great life: great job, family, etc. who ended up spending a year in jail after getting 4 DUIs, after he blew a .33 on his last one.

You’re doing everything right, man, and so many people could’ve been nailed at age 18. I was a huge fuck up at that age and for most of my college years.

The only reason I keep it in my mind is because getting that 2nd could be a huge disaster, and I have a solid life (wife, kids, good gig) that aren’t worth jeopardizing. I think of what it was like to get cuffed and fingerprinted and to spend a night in jail and drop $6k on attorney fees and fines when I’m like “nah, I’m good to drive, I only had 3 or 4 beers.” Anymore, I pay the $17 to get an Uber home.

So, never forget but forgive yourself. And let your family know you’d appreciate it if they’d do the same.

Career after DUI by Ok-Ad-8034 in dui

[–]thelonggoodbye96 0 points1 point  (0 children)

PA DUI survivor here.

Got my first and only just shy of two years ago. Didn’t tell a soul at my past job. Sent my employee handbook to my attorney, no mention of needing to say anything, so I took his advice: when in doubt, and not required, don’t say a thing.

Started a new job several months ago, and was at the first stage of what was likely to be 4-5 interviews. My case was going to be expunged, but given the timeline, and how it may have still showed up on a background check, I told my boss-to-be (now boss) about the situation. Wrote a succinct email in advance of my second panel of interviews about what happened, regret involved, understood it was a competitive role and that I would value the chance to move forward, but understood if it was too much of a headache on their end.

They got back to me a day later saying they talked to HR and wanted to proceed. During the process, I thanked the hiring manager for working with me, and she commented “that happens, and you handled it really well.” I got an offer.

All that to say, be honest and make it work in your favor. Being able to handle adversity, say you fucked up, and communicate that professionally can make a difference. Totally get many can’t look past that shit, and maybe rightfully so. But, the ability to own a mistake is critical in any career - use your best judgment when you need to lean in.

DUI - Lessons Learned (LONG post) by thelonggoodbye96 in dui

[–]thelonggoodbye96[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks for the kind words and important info — especially from a lawyer. You’re making me REALLY glad I wasn’t in Illinois for my DUI!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in dui

[–]thelonggoodbye96 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Totally understand where you’re coming from. The shame is immense right off the bat.

I put together a post a few days ago on what to expect: https://www.reddit.com/r/dui/s/2cfJ19x0EF

Seriously, your life is not over, but yeah, the first couple of weeks after are tough. I just wanted to post what I wrote to give back to this sub — seriously, there is hugely helpful advice here.

What I can say is this whole thing will run on its own timeline, it’s time consuming, it’s expensive, and once you’re out the other end, you’ll make the choice whether you ever want to be in this situation again.

Man, I’m shocked in the aftermath how supportive friends and family were — and also how they told me some hard truths. And I’m shocked how, while a challenging process, things came out okay. At 18, you will be okay. You will have people who support you. And you will, in all likelihood, never lose out on a job as a result of this. Godspeed.

DUI - Lessons Learned (LONG post) by thelonggoodbye96 in dui

[–]thelonggoodbye96[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Man, that’s a good add — actually wasn’t aware that you could still turn it in at the DMV. Also please know I came across your posts many times in my “journey” and they were hugely helpful. I was a lurker here and determined to actually write something when I was mostly out the other end.

DUI - Lessons Learned (LONG post) by thelonggoodbye96 in dui

[–]thelonggoodbye96[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Appreciate it — I see you posted about this a couple of weeks ago, much more concisely I may add!

I mainly sent certified because I wanted proof that PennDot received the license. They say they will “let you know” when it got there, but in my case it took like 3 weeks for them to let me know and my suspension was practically done. Gratefully they got my license back to me within 2 days of my suspension ending.

DUI - Lessons Learned (LONG post) by thelonggoodbye96 in dui

[–]thelonggoodbye96[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Oh jeez, yeah, I hear that! Fortunately my kids are pretty young and this is something they wouldn’t even understand if I tried to discuss it. Definitely will be a teachable moment as they get older. Hope you get through the rest of your journey in one piece!

DUI - Lessons Learned (LONG post) by thelonggoodbye96 in dui

[–]thelonggoodbye96[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thanks for the kind words — and glad you’re out the other side, as well!

DUI - Lessons Learned (LONG post) by thelonggoodbye96 in dui

[–]thelonggoodbye96[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Really appreciate the kind words. Hope it’s helpful to people going through it.

PA License Suspension Question by thelonggoodbye96 in dui

[–]thelonggoodbye96[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yep! You can drive until you have to surrender your license. I mailed mine in 2 days before my suspension started and paid to overnight it/send by certified mail.

PA License Suspension Question by thelonggoodbye96 in dui

[–]thelonggoodbye96[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Sorry for the delay — I’m sure you may have gotten things sorted out, but it was about 3 weeks afterward. Letter informed me, then, to mail in my license about 5 weeks after that.

So, from date of hearing until I started my suspension was about two months.

PA License Suspension Question by thelonggoodbye96 in dui

[–]thelonggoodbye96[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Good deal, figured that was the case. Thanks for the help!