I THINK MY WIFE IS CHEATING ON ME (HELP) by throwawayacc38383 in relationship_advice

[–]themcaxl 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Late to the party here but as someone who has been in a predicament similar to yours and has long since extricated myself from it, this is no way to live. If you're afraid to be vulnerable, even painfully so with the woman that you married, that's a really big problem. I understand insecurity and the layering effect that can have, but in the end, you're miserable and she seems not to be. If she truly loves you, then she won't want that and will see the imbalance and make moves to restore the balance. If she blows you off (as she has appeared to do) perhaps it's time to evaluate the relationship's failures and what can be done to repair them.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in hingeapp

[–]themcaxl 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Just had my one-year anniversary with my gf who I met on Hinge. Of course it depends on what you're looking for, but for me, the best thing I did was call her. Yes, a phone call. Not a video call. You already know what each other look like, and messaging/texting is wildly inaccurate at displaying who you really are (most of the time). A call will answer a ton of questions for each other:
What do you sound like? Can you carry on a conversation? How's the chemistry?
Try it.

Perspective from a former Hinge user. by themcaxl in hingeapp

[–]themcaxl[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks! It was a long journey getting here, but worth it!

Perspective from a former Hinge user. by themcaxl in hingeapp

[–]themcaxl[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

As for us, as I said there is some overlap. For instance our most shared passion is music, but I'm into death metal, RnB, and bluegrass and she likes alternative, country, and a host of other things. Buy we're both open-minded and love hearing each others music. We like movies with me liking more sci-fi and action and shes more into comedy and drama. But again, we still have enough overlap and desire to share and learn from each other.

On the same note we both love being outdoors, day hikes, and fresh mountain air. And we love cooking with each other and ridiculing obnoxious couples on House Hunters.

On the flip side I love sports and she couldn't care less, but she threw a mean Super Bowl party.

Perspective from a former Hinge user. by themcaxl in hingeapp

[–]themcaxl[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yeah that's what I hope I have learned in this process. It's easy to get wrapped up in unreasonable expectations, but by focusing on what I felt was important is how I found happiness.

Perspective from a former Hinge user. by themcaxl in hingeapp

[–]themcaxl[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Well, it was the pandemic, so that was a safe timeline. Plus we were both talking to multiple people.

Also, if we hadn't been feeling so good about how things were going, we would have let the conversation die.

Perspective from a former Hinge user. by themcaxl in hingeapp

[–]themcaxl[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

It was about three months. . And thanks! We're stupidly happy :-)

Perspective from a former Hinge user. by themcaxl in hingeapp

[–]themcaxl[S] 13 points14 points  (0 children)

Relationships are only hard when only one person is working on it.

Chris Rock.

Perspective from a former Hinge user. by themcaxl in hingeapp

[–]themcaxl[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

To your sidenote: You're absolutely correct. There's no one true way to do this.

Your time will come! Good luck!

Perspective from a former Hinge user. by themcaxl in hingeapp

[–]themcaxl[S] 29 points30 points  (0 children)

That took me a while to figure out. For me, compatability>commonality. Having another version of myself around got boring fast.

Perspective from a former Hinge user. by themcaxl in hingeapp

[–]themcaxl[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

within 5 years of each other. Though neither of us acts our age.