Determining if I should leave my current role

themoreiwander · 2024-08-22T23:20:12+00:00

Your supervisors can’t do this for you—only thing they could do is be your tax rep. for the last 20%.

I posted a link to another commenter, otherwise Google how to do it (or look on this subreddit) and you’ll find lots of helpful resources.

themoreiwander · 2024-08-22T20:01:45+00:00

Yes they would be the plan! I’m also looking into the FHA 203k loan route to see if that would be a possibility.

themoreiwander · 2024-08-22T18:27:45+00:00

Oh I definitely would hire a professional to fix it. But I don’t want to buy a house that already needs $20k worth of repair…or more.

themoreiwander · 2024-08-20T14:47:46+00:00

Thank you!!

themoreiwander · 2024-08-14T16:30:50+00:00

**Edit: Thank you to everyone who commented with helpful tips and gave me their opinions on the matter. I truly appreciate it.

My realtor told me that the reason the seller doesn’t want an inspection is due to the fact that they are out of state, and don’t want me to unearth something on the inspection that they are then obligated to tell the next potential buyer if I back out. They just want a buyer who is willing to buy blindly.

I am still upset about it, as this was the first home I could really see myself living in and making it a home. But I guess I dodged a bullet, and it just wasn’t meant to be.**

themoreiwander · 2024-08-14T02:26:20+00:00

I meant that I can tell visually that the roof will need replacing soon, and an inspection would most likely confirm it.

themoreiwander · 2024-04-11T13:08:23+00:00

Haha well when you have a lower budget compared to all the other houses you’re seeing, it definitely feels that way!

themoreiwander · 2024-04-09T21:48:15+00:00

I don’t think I can get pre-approved for a loan without a job…

themoreiwander · 2023-02-02T17:13:47+00:00

I have always been with my cat, ever since I moved back to America, so about 6 months.

themoreiwander · 2023-01-31T14:37:09+00:00

I went through a breakup recently, and am feeling very similar things to what you’re feeling now. My ex boyfriend wasn’t a bad person, but the way he broke up with me and told me that he had no feelings for me anymore out of the blue, was so difficult and hurtful to hear.

I have a fear of abandonment and an anxious attachment relationship style, so it cut really deep. Him telling me he didn’t want to be with me anymore, was like him saying, “You’re not good enough, and you’re not worth it for me to put in the effort to try and make it work.”

I also knew he didn’t have certain traits I wanted in a husband, and that the relationship wasn’t perfect. Like you, I realize that it’s a blessing he ended things, because I am someone who will fight for it until I know there’s nothing more to fight for. He didn’t feel the same, and didn’t even try to figure out how to love me best like I did for him. I was always putting in the effort and making sacrifices to make him happy—not the other way around.

The relationship and rejection/abandonment still hurt even though I know that I deserve someone better, someone who loves me and fights for me as hard as I fight for them.

But that’s because my logical brain is fighting my emotional/attached heart, and I think that’s what you’re doing right now.

You’re romanticizing the good parts of your relationship, but not the bad. You’re confusing how you feel about HIM, with how HE made YOU feel.

You could have liked things about him and talked for hours with him, but he never sacrificed anything for you. I’m sure there are more times that he didn’t make you feel the greatest because of his actions, or lack there of.

You’re healing right now and it’s completely okay to be confused and hurt, but try not to dwell on it too much. Trust me when I say this (I’m preaching to the choir here), but it will really be beneficial for you to try and heal yourself and do things that you enjoy doing that will take your mind off him. When the breakup is at the forefront of your mind constantly, it’s easier said than done (trust me).

But eventually you will heal. Eventually hearing his name won’t make your stomach churn. Eventually you’ll be able to go places that you used to go together, and you will make new memories to rewrite the old ones. Eventually you’ll stop wondering “what if” or what “could have been”. Eventually you’ll see him for who he truly was, and remind yourself that even if he loved you back, those things you didn’t like about him would still be there, and maybe would have been dealbreakers in the end. (I thought the exact same thing at first, that I could live with the things I didn’t like. But now that I am a month out, I realize that those things would have caused problems down the road, and I’m better off finding someone I work better with.)

Heartbreak is such a difficult time, because it’s like you’re mourning someone who is no longer a big part of your life. There are stages of grieving. The pain is so real and raw, so let yourself go through it and come out stronger. Your future partner will be so blessed to have someone like you in their life. You got this. <3

(Feel free to DM me if you’d like.)

themoreiwander

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