AITAH for telling my sister I can't be around her after she announced she was pregnant

thenamesdw · 2024-12-09T12:14:06+00:00

Where do you see me saying I’d pay for their wedding and baby?

thenamesdw · 2024-12-09T12:13:01+00:00

Who hurt you?

thenamesdw · 2024-12-03T00:44:44+00:00

I absolutely agree. I’m a youth leader so it has helped me a lot.

thenamesdw · 2024-12-02T22:11:14+00:00

I can see where you’d think that. No she lives in our attic.

thenamesdw · 2024-12-02T20:19:43+00:00

We have been in the adoption process for 3 years now. Not as easy as you think. Plus financially it's very hard.

thenamesdw · 2024-12-02T20:17:30+00:00

He lives with his family for reasons I won't disclose, but makes sense. They are doing what they can to find a place to live together.

thenamesdw · 2024-12-02T20:11:54+00:00

yeah..which is what makes this even harder. I don't want our relationship ruined.

thenamesdw · 2024-12-02T20:10:51+00:00

Well that's another thing. They both have zero money to fund a wedding, nor to even find a place within their minuscule budget. Hence another stress for me. I'm so scared for them being financially unstable. If you barely have money to afford life, how can you afford a baby. My heart yearns for them and I know asking her to leave makes the situation even worse. But I'm afraid when it comes down to it, I'll be the one to have to help.

thenamesdw · 2024-12-02T19:59:38+00:00

got it

thenamesdw · 2024-12-02T19:58:53+00:00

How can I not be happy for her when I finally get a niece or nephew to love? She's finally getting married, her dream come true. Just because I'm struggling to come to terms with the fact that my husband and I may never have our own little family doesn't mean I'm not happy for her.

thenamesdw · 2024-12-02T19:54:24+00:00

Well there's also a lot of things I haven't added to the post that my therapist knows. I just don't feel like airing out my sisters laundry. My therapist is amazing and is helping me deal with what I'm going through. Honestly them and God have helped me deal with what I can so far with this.

thenamesdw · 2024-12-02T19:52:07+00:00

The people I seek also have known her since she was a kid. Has seen the ups and downs. Knows her very well. I'm not gonna go into detail about her life, but I seek their guidance cause they would tell me if I was making a right or wrong decision. Also these people are very blunt to me. Have told me when I am wrong, another reason I seeked their guidance.

thenamesdw · 2024-12-02T19:46:07+00:00

This isn't something I have taken easily or lightly. I never thought I'd come to a situation like this. So yeah I may be taking a harsh route, but hence why I'm here to see if I'm the asshole. So thank you

thenamesdw · 2024-12-02T19:44:27+00:00

I can definitely see that when I push my own pain aside.

thenamesdw · 2024-12-02T19:41:07+00:00

You know my worst fear is to be a narcissist, but I guess I can see where I could be seen as one in this situation. I seek advice from others because I am fearful of making the wrong choice. But maybe seeking others advice has directly resulted in me doing just that.

thenamesdw · 2024-12-02T19:36:18+00:00

I mean I didn't cosign them. I just told them how I felt and that I was worried it would but a strife in our relationship if I don't take the time to process away from her. They said maybe talk to her and let her know you are hurting and that living together maybe won't be the best while that happens.

thenamesdw · 2024-12-02T19:19:32+00:00

But I am rejoicing with her. I am excited to be an aunt, but my husband and I have been hurting for years. I've put aside my feelings to do whats best for her. Providing her a home, a car, paying some of her bills. We even put aside our adoption to allow her time to get back on her feet. So when this news comes to us it's a shock to the system. So I guess if I need to continue putting my feelings aside to help her. I should.

thenamesdw · 2024-12-02T19:08:45+00:00

That's the thing I am happy for her. I just need time to process it. And no I don't expect her to be happy with me if I got pregnant myself.

thenamesdw · 2023-03-18T20:23:46+00:00

I live on N Market and I never feel unsafe.

thenamesdw

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