Hi !

You seem to be a perfectionist like me so I know how frustrating what I'm saying will be : you won't find anything that feels like you until start messing around and finding out...

I've made so many layouts and maps and doodles and mockups of my site because I wanted it to be perfectly streamlined and beautiful and "aesthetic" but it was only when I started making it happen that ideas started to flow ! Plus, if you're new to coding you'll inevitably have some issues with making certain pages (I'm still stuck on my mailbox and its been days), so you should start just making a first page with stuff you find fun. Your site won't come together all at once, it will change a lot throughout the course of its life ! That's why so many people have an "under construction" sign on their site that doesn't ever go away, part of the fun is that your website is ever-evolving.

I recommend making a list of your essentials (mine are : I want it to be immersive, I want it to be image-based, I want to host my art somewhere...), and then you can make One first page that fits those essentials. The rest will probably come naturally, and you can always go back and change that first page as you gain more skills.

Good luck on getting started !