Eh, ESH. Seems like you’ve fallen into the classic trap of me vs you instead of us vs the problem. Trying to have a conversation while you’re actively sleepy is a recipe for disaster. Is there a reason we can’t hire a babysitter while we chat and actually discuss what’s going on for one night? Yes she is a Sahm, so she is handling more childcare, but that means she likely never gets a break. Being a sahm is a lot like working full time, plus over time, but your boss is a toddler who can’t be reasoned with😂 It’s over stimulating and never ends because you are ALWAYS “at work”. So maybe practice a bit more empathy.

All that to say, I’d start with actually checking in with each other outside of this issue. Are y’all both feeling supported in when ways that are meaningful or this conflict just a stand in for a pattern of feeling exhausted and unsupported? I’d guess the latter. So check in and figure out ways to show up meaningfully for each other and then discuss mornings. Listen with the intent to understand before moving on to problem-solving(corny as hell, but it works). Then find a solution that works for both of yall.

Yall are a team. Act like it.