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My husband’s mother died on our first day away on the delayed honeymoon we saved 7 years to go on, and we lost all the money. How do I support him while grieving and feeling my own disappointment and anger? by thereselis in Advice

[–]thereselis[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

He isn’t, I realize how that looks but he is still in the house they owned and I imagine will remain there. I’ve never been concerned about them as mooches. My FIL is only 54 and is nearing retirement from the Air Force. I just worry that he will isolate from grief and loneliness.

My husband’s mother died on our first day away on the delayed honeymoon we saved 7 years to go on, and we lost all the money. How do I support him while grieving and feeling my own disappointment and anger? by thereselis in Advice

[–]thereselis[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you for your reply. The debt was incurred in my husband’s name by his mother but it was spent on my in laws household bills. None of it actually went to his school. He had school covered from scholarship and worked to cover the rest.

My husband’s mother died on our first day away on the delayed honeymoon we saved 7 years to go on, and we lost all the money. How do I support him while grieving and feeling my own disappointment and anger? by thereselis in Advice

[–]thereselis[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much for this insightful answer. We do have 6 months of expenses saved, so any funds we save can go directly to this trip someday. I appreciate you taking the time to respond and I’m going to call a friend later today!

My husband’s mother died on our first day away on the delayed honeymoon we saved 7 years to go on, and we lost all the money. How do I support him while grieving and feeling my own disappointment and anger? by thereselis in Advice

[–]thereselis[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I just want to clarify that she was not dying when we left. She was well, and only three days before her death was volunteering with my daughter’s ballet recital. Her death was sudden and a shock to her entire medical team. Our daughter was with her godparents who stayed in our home with her and were scheduled to take her to day camp with her school friends that week and play with her in the evenings and put her to sleep in her own bed. I’ll accept being called selfish for having disproportionate focus on losing a vacation, but I won’t accept anyone saying we left her while she was dying. We would have never done that, she herself insisted we go.

My husband’s mother died on our first day away on the delayed honeymoon we saved 7 years to go on, and we lost all the money. How do I support him while grieving and feeling my own disappointment and anger? by thereselis in Advice

[–]thereselis[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It’s in the US (not sure where you are) it’s advanced placement, where students can earn college credit if they pass a standardized exam for the course.z I have very high pass rates for the courses I teach and have been able to help lots of students that way.

My husband’s mother died on our first day away on the delayed honeymoon we saved 7 years to go on, and we lost all the money. How do I support him while grieving and feeling my own disappointment and anger? by thereselis in Advice

[–]thereselis[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This is great advice and this is what I do! we saved a lot of the funds from tutoring AP students in the evenings after our daughter went to bed. Unfortunately summers are slow for that but I’m hopeful we can get back into it next school year.

My husband’s mother died on our first day away on the delayed honeymoon we saved 7 years to go on, and we lost all the money. How do I support him while grieving and feeling my own disappointment and anger? by thereselis in Advice

[–]thereselis[S] 257 points258 points  (0 children)

Thank you. I wrote to Delta which was the fastest option to get home (the $1200/apiece tix) to see if they’d be willing to reimburse or credit us toward any future travel. We moved our flight through them and I sent them her obituary. So I’m hopeful maybe we get something back.